A baby shower rant.

Leah821

Sorry to unload about this but I really need to vent. So, my baby shower is less than three weeks away and one of the two friends who is throwing it suddenly realized she is scheduled to be out of town for work (I clear the shower date with her months and months ago-invitation have obviously gone out and a bunch of family is coming into town just for this etc. etc.). My friend who is flaking cooks for a living and had offered to contribute most of the food as well as the location for the shower, which was going to be on the rooftop deck of her apartment building, so now we have no food plan and much worse, no location. My other friend who was throwing this with her means really well but she gets overwhelmed easily and doesn't have much experience throwing any type of party to event so I am basically going to have to step in to host my own party in my own home and I am PISSED. Any pieces of advice or words of encouragement would be much appreciated Trying my best to keep this in perspective as just a party when the really important thing is a healthy baby...thanks all.

thefuturemrsdaniel

Well a plus is that now you don't have to worry about lugging the presents from the party location to your house. That's always a good thing

LoveLee85

Oh man....that's a massive oversight on your friends part! I'm so sorry. Maybe look for a free/cheap hall to throw it? What time is the shower? You aren't required to have a huge full meal....unless it's at lunch/dinner time-or says so on the invitations! Yikes.

To make you feel better, I just found it my shower with my DH family will be hosted at a restaurant.....the 'invitation' was a text message and its 'buy your own plate'?!?! I'm mortified, but nothing I can do since its in a few days.

Yiggle09

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. First thing you must do is get out to your guests the change in venue! I had to practically host my own shower as well because my mother is flaky. Even up to the day she was changing plans and things. I had to buy the food/ drinks, pick it up and drive it to the venue. I had to pick the key up at the venue which was very inconvenient because it was a parish house at a church that was only open tues wed thurs 9 to 2 pm! I asked her for weeks about decorations and we finally got together to see what we needed and she had that pretty much under control. When she got to the venue I had already gotten there because I had the key and the food. She acted all surprised and said I wasn't supposed to be there and see everything. With my husband helping with the table set up, my friend val, my mom and me decorating we barely finished in the two hours we had to set up. Without me I cannot imagine. Sorry, didn't mean to add my rant to yours or take away your issue! I just feel like I can relate to what your going through. Despite all this the party was great, I was exhausted but very happy with how everything turned out. You just need to buckle down and focus on yourself and the party and try to let your anger go. My husband was super pissed for me that my mother allowed me to do so much for the shower. He kept saying your paying so much for this party, we should have not had a party and just bought everything ourselves and I was like, the food was 260 my friend val split it with me and I bought 60 bucks worth of chips and soda, all in all I would much rather all the hassle from the party and to have had the experience. Let me tell you, I have never felt so much love directed to me as I did at my shower. I truely felt humbled by the generosity of my family and I would not change that for the world. Hopefully my words were helpful? GL and focus directed to you!

krose92

thefuturemrsdaniel makes a good point, lugging gifts back to the house can be a royal pain in the butt!

If it makes you feel better, DH's family has yet to actually plan the shower they offered to throw for me.  They didn't even ask about dates.  Thankfully, hubby let them know that I'm busy the two weekends they had kind of figured on throwing it (sister's wedding shower/bachelorette party and a trip).  Oh, and there's a very good chance that my baby shower will become a joint shower with DH's sister in law, who's 2nd is also due in September.  

LaurenNewph

@Leah821 first thing first just figure out where you are going to have it and let the guests know! Everything will fall into place, and try not to stress too much!

@krose92 I feel like it's a little unfair you'd have to share your baby shower with someone who probably already had one! Is your family throwing one for you?

WDDCH

Things happen, don't stress. Try to have fun with it since this is just the way it is and I'm sure it'll all end well. Positivity can make all the difference in the world.

berenice090515

Don't stress, it may be a lot but since it was her fault she can't let you still have it on her apt. I mean if you can get the other friend to help with the clean up maybe she can lend you a key?
Or go with your home idea and just try a very budget friendly menu look for sales etc...

CaboBride2015

berenice090515 said:

Don't stress, it may be a lot but since it was her fault she can't let you still have it on her apt. I mean if you can get the other friend to help with the clean up maybe she can lend you a key?
Or go with your home idea and just try a very budget friendly menu look for sales etc...

I would definitely ask if you can still use the venue and as other PP mentioned, unless your having it at lunch or dinner time I don't think you have to go nuts with a meal. Snacks and sweets are fine. Do you have another family member or friend who could jump in and help so you don't have to worry so much about it?

tlc11934

Can you still have it at your friend's house? Just because she'll be out of town doesn't mean she should screw you out of the awesome venue. If you're close enough for her to host, you're close enough to snag a key.

She should also help come up with an alternative food plan - pay for 1/3 of the catering along with your other two hosts?

Taekarate1978

Just to add to your rant: my best friend had not said a word about a shower. Another friend and my mother took over and invited my best friend to help. My flaky best friend said well, we were planning a surprise shower on the 4th of July. We always have a huge party on the fourth, I don't want my shower to invade our celebration. My other friend said, umm this 4th which is on Saturday, that no one knows about?? So needless to say, my other friend and mother completely took over and have only told me the date: August 16. Im grateful they took over from my flaky but well loved best friend.