Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

The pain of a loss...

At 10w pregnant, I was just gearing up to tell my parents and close friends when sadly today I unexpectedly had a miscarriage. If the pain wasn't the indication, I went into emergency and they confirmed the loss.
The emotional pain is one thing but the physical is another. I get severe period pain but this is something else. At one point whilst in emergency I actually laughed with the nurse because if I was struggling with this then I will be useless at giving birth.
I'm feeling very emotionally empty though and the physical pain just adds insult to injury. I'm normally the strong one out of my husband and I so when he saw me break down he knew how much this was and will continue to affect me. Really just looking for any kind of support here as I'm not sure what I'm in for... I just want to feel normal again....

Re: The pain of a loss...

  • I'm so so sorry for your loss. I'm in a very similar boat. Yesterday, I spent the the day in the ER and they confirmed my miscarriage at 12 week. My heart, body, soul are shattered. You are not alone in this pain.
    My heart goes out to you, I don't have much to offer right now in the way of comforting words, except that I truly understand what you are going through.
  • I am so sorry for your loss. Once your loss sinks in and your hormones level out, days get easier. You just learn to cope in everyday life with your pain, but the pain doesn't go away. Don't be afraid to be selfish these next few weeks.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish that none of us had to be in these situations, or at least that there was something I could do to ease everyone's pain. It gets easier over time and you will feel more like yourself again, but there will be ups and downs. Let yourself feel whatever it is you feel at any given time - don't feel guilty about being upset, about not being the strong one, or about reaching out for support. And remember, too, that what happened isn't your fault and you're not alone.

    If you haven't or aren't planning to tell many people about what happened (we didn't), or even if you do, definitely stay connected on this board. Reading the posts here and all the love and support from these ladies definitely helped me get through things.
      

         TTC #1 --- BFP #1 5/15, loss at 5 weeks --- BFP #2 12/15, loss at 4+3 --- RE testing 3/16 normal, still trying for our rainbow    

  • I am so sorry for your loss. I was 11w3d went to ER and discovered baby stopped growing 3 weeks prior. I too was gearing up to tell everyone after my 12w sono, so heartbreaking. The physical pain deffinitly makes the emotional pain worse. 10 days after MC I feel better physically and finally emotionally as well, but I still get cycles of sadness throughout the day, it will happen but does get better with time.
    And if it is any consolation - my MC at 12w4d was by far worse than my 3 natural/unmedicated childbirths (the emotional aspect does play a big role). The aftermath/recovery was worse as well. Just saying that so that you don't truely doubt your abilities when the time comes. It's good you were able to have a laugh amidst a difficult time though - but I felt the same way when I was in the ER last week.
    I hope you get your rainbow baby soon. We will never forget what we have gone through but the intense sadness won't last forever. *hugs*
  • I am so, so sorry for your loss. My first MC was at 9.5 weeks, and it's so hard when you're that far along because you're SO CLOSE to being able to tell people.  It's such a hard thing to go through, but it will get better eventually.  Sending you positive thoughts. 
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