Losing hope after 3 rounds of IUI

babycrazy8

Hi guys, I'm on my third round of IUI post two years of trying naturally - currently in my 2ww (10 dpo). I decided to test today and it's a BFN. I know that it may still be too early, but I have heard many stories where others have seen a BFP from days 8-10 and I guess I was just hopeful. Last month my period arrived just before I was scheduled in for bloods. I am trying to keep my head up but the whole process is starting to take its toll on me and my husband. Especially as we were previously told my tubes were blocked, but randomly I managed to conceive but unfortunately had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks early this year. How do others cope with this long journey? Thanks for listening!

MrsBwIVF

BFP mentioned

I'm so sorry for all of your struggles, I know how difficult it can be.
We struggled for almost 3 years with natural, clomid, 2 iuis, all which only resulted in 1 pregnancy conceived naturally that we lost early on.
We decided on moving on to ivf and lost twins early on. We did ivf again with frozen embryos and were finally successful, I'm currently 12w3d with twins.
It DOES happen! It's a hard, heartbreaking, terrible, emotional, frustrating, everlasting journey. And it only makes it worse that it's such a taboo subject and most of us don't know anyone close to us irl that are going down this dark road that we can talk to about it.
The way we coped is we kept our super strange sense of humor about everything. Our saying eventually became "only us would this happen to" and eventually, our doctors began chiming in with it.
We also decided to let more people around us in on our struggles. It felt better to not be feeling so ashamed of the fact we were facing this battle. Because, there isn't anything to be ashamed of! And when we started opening up to our families, it was amazing. It felt like a cloud had been lifted and we were able to open up and they were able to attempt to understand. Also, although DH and I aren't the most religious people, it felt amazing to hear that those around us that are, were keeping us in their prayers. It was so great when we finally got to spread the news to hear people tell us "finally! I've been praying/hoping/wishing this for you!" Having that great feeling of support, really helped me through the darkest of days.
So try to keep your head up, remember it's NOT your fault, and keep thinking of the end of the journey, when you get to hold lo in your arms. And know, you are not alone in all of this! Good luck!

tlateef

You're not alone. After 3 iui cycles it finally happened for me although the blood test from the third cycle was a bfn. Turns out I ovulated later than expected so even after my 2ww it was still too early to tell. Wasn't until the following month (that I took off from treatments) that I found out. I even bled and everything which turned out to be implantation bleeding (very much like a period). While this may not be your case don't lose hope! I work with many other women who have gone down this road and patience is very helpful to keep the stress down. I'm 31w3d with twins now and trust me when I say it can happen to you too. Some things to discuss with your doctor might be what other options you have such as dosage or medications. We had met with our doc during our month off to do this and had decided the following month we would be upping some of the meds and doing a stronger cycle. Turns out we didn't need to but it was nice knowing we hadn't exhausted our options and that we weren't forced into IVF just yet. Good luck to you on your journey, I hope you get your happy ending soon. My best advice from my own experience is to just stay away from the home preg tests. They just get your stress level so much higher and it isnt worth the tears. After my first cycle I stopped with them and yes you don't have that time to prepare to hear bad news from the doc- but it felt just as bad hearing from the doc as it did reading the stick so why hurt yourself twice? Good luck again!

Malbright1015

Infertility is such an emotional ride. There are days you feel positive and then days where you are at your lowest with no hope. But, you have to stay hopeful and faithful. Mu husband and I are Christians so we pray together a lot and have tons of family members praying as well. The support from friends and family is helpful. If we end up getting pregnant we will definitely share our story so that it can help others in their struggle. We are on our 5th iui. The first 3 I took clomid 100mg, and these last 2 I took the same dose of clomid and we added the fsh injections plus a trigger shot. Our 5th iui was yesterday. I can't believe it's been 5 already. I do feel a lot like its never going to happen but I try to not let my mind get the best of me. Reading my devotional book I have and looking up scripture in my bible has helped me be more at peace during this time. I'm like you and I start testing each month at 10dpo, and each time it's negative I still hold on to the hope that it could still be positive. Two out of the 5 iui's I did get my period before my blood pregnancy test. The devestation is too much to handle each month, and each time a cycle fails I feel like I can't bear to go through another one. But we do, and we push forward because we want kids in the worst way. I wish you the best of luck and I will pray for everyone who is struggling.

babycrazy8

@MrsBwIVF @tlateef @Malbright1015 thank you all for your responses. All your comments have helped me - especially today when I feel the lowest I have in a while. Your stories are inspiring and humbling. You are all such strong people to go through everything you have been through and then tell your stories. I really can't wait for the day when we have our baby in our arms. We like you @MrsBwIVF (also congrats!) have just started to open up to friends and family more, it has really helped. Though no one is going through the same situation or have had fertility issues, it just feels good to be able to tell someone the struggles we are going through on a day to day basis. @Malbright1015 (good luck with #5 - you're amazing) we some how keep pushing on with the next treatment each time too. I know what we are aiming for and I just need to remind myself of that each time I start to lose a bit of hope. @tlateef congrats!!! That is so awesome with your twins! Again thank you guys so much you have really picked me up and helped me get through today. We will keep going and do it with a sense of humor too. We have some how lost that part of us since stepping on this gigantic emotional roller coaster! xxx