Newb needs support

aliford714

hi all!

I've been lurking for a few weeks and I'm just feeling down so I would love some support.

I'm 28 and DH will be 28 in a couple weeks. We've been ttc for about 10 months with no luck yet. Finally decided to schedule a preliminary consult/testing with an RE for next week for both me and DH. I feel like if nothing is wrong it will put me at ease a little bit and if something is going on then we can start to find a solution. Any advice on just getting started with this process? Questions I should ask? Just feeling scared and would love to know more from people that have been through it. Thanks in advance

missteacherlady16

aliford714 said:

hi all! I've been lurking for a few weeks and I'm just feeling down so I would love some support. I'm 28 and DH will be 28 in a couple weeks. We've been ttc for about 10 months with no luck yet. Finally decided to schedule a preliminary consult/testing with an RE for next week for both me and DH. I feel like if nothing is wrong it will put me at ease a little bit and if something is going on then we can start to find a solution. Any advice on just getting started with this process? Questions I should ask? Just feeling scared and would love to know more from people that have been through it. Thanks in advance

Honestly, I would encourage you to wait two more months to see an RE. It can take a healthy couple up to a year to conceive. You're still within the normal range. 

What have you been doing already? Charting, temping, OPKs?

aliford714

I did some opks but have been thinking about starting to chart and temp. Another reason we're wanting to go in sooner rather than later is that DH was diagnosed with a varicocele about 6 years ago so we're thinking it's definitely possible there might be an issue with sperm at the time the doctor didn't think it required surgery and since we were young and not really thinking about getting pregnant at the time we probably didn't ask as many questions as we should have

TheBorg7of9

There is a post somewhere around here where a poster described her first experience at the RE.

I would  just say bring your husband and read up about fertility treatments.

A book I really liked was geared toward men and called How to Make Love to a Plastic Cup.

aliford714

Okay I'll search for that post. Thanks for the recommendation!

TheBorg7of9

aliford714 said:

I did some opks but have been thinking about starting to chart and temp. Another reason we're wanting to go in sooner rather than later is that DH was diagnosed with a varicocele about 6 years ago so we're thinking it's definitely possible there might be an issue with sperm at the time the doctor didn't think it required surgery and since we were young and not really thinking about getting pregnant at the time we probably didn't ask as many questions as we should have

You should absolutely chart your temps!  Do the tutorials on ferilityfriend and download the app.

Also, this is the blog by my husband's urologist.  It has lots of info on male infertility.  https://www.maledoc.com/blog/

If it turns out your husband has a problem, he needs to see a urologist who specializes in infertility.

aliford714

Small world. We live in the Chicago area thanks for sharing

surferP528

Just out of curiosity, what would an RE tell you if you went and had not been temping or using OPKs regularly? I'm not trying to call out the OP at all, I'm just wondering. It seems like that would be a critical first step to know if it's just poorly timed intercourse or a medical issue. I would hope those would be the first items they'd suggest prior to suggesting a medical intervention.

aliford714

From what I understand they are doing preliminary blood work for me and a semen analysis for DH just to make sure there are no glaring or obvious issues. I assume from there they would make appropriate recommendations but that's also why I want advice from all of you I don't want to jump straight to medical stuff if there are other things we should be doing

bsckgb7

I second postponing the appt for 2 months and charting/temping for those 2 months to see what your chart says.  How are you currently timing sex?  Do you have EWCM? 

aliford714

Pretty much having sex every other day throughout the month but not always consistent. Trying to just have fun with it and not make it feel like a job. Try to do every day when I have EWCM. Typically have it for about 3-4 days during my cycle

jnissa

An RE can still tell you a lot without charting. Almost certainly she'll run the standard test battery: amh, fsh and a day three androfollicle count as well as get a semen analysis. So that will rule out anything hormonal and obvious. Then she'll check your uterus and for blocked tubes, also ruling out anything physical and obvious. Plus those day 3 tests and follow-ups can confirm ovulation and whether or not it's close to what the OPK says. So there's a lot. Even if it's just badly timed intercourse she'll at least be able to point them in that direction. 

Eh. They've been trying for 10 months so this appointment is in month 11. By the time she can do any testing with a new cycle it's about a year anyway. Potato/potato. I applaud being open to seeing an RE and aggressive about figuring things out. 

bsckgb7

That's awesome that you are monitoring your EWCM.  EWCM can be a sign your body is gearing up to ovulate (EWCM makes it easier for sperm to move around), but no way to tell if you actually did.  Temping can confirm ovulation AFTER it happened.  It sounds like are doing pretty good though with watching for signs!!  Welcome, you will learn so much!!

aliford714

Thanks so much everyone I was pretty scared about doing an initial post but I really appreciate the support and advice. Next step--start temping this weekend