When to let friends/family know?

jojop627

I am currently 11w3 days and had doctors app this morning. Since I have a retroverted uterus, they couldn't find heartbeat with the doppler. My doc told me to come back in two weeks so we can try to find heartbeat then. She also recommended waiting to tell people until after that appointment. By that time I will be 13.5 weeks! We did have ultrasound at 6.5 weeks and saw baby and heartbeat. We are dying to tell people!! How long did you wait to tell family/friends? Would I be safe telling people before the next doctors appointment?

babypeach15

I told my mother and close relatives when I first found out at 6 weeks. We just announced it on FB this week and I am 13 weeks and 2 days.

HungryRunner76

I waited until I was 14 weeks with my daughter and I probably will do the same with this one.

It's completely a personal decision that you and your husband should make together. The general "rule" is after the first trimester is over because that's when the majority of miscarriages occur; however, they can and do happen anytime (not saying this to worry you and you shouldn't worry unless there's reason).

jasbaby2

We aren't telling family until about 16 weeks and won't be telling friends until sometime later. We are just not comfortable before that, not sure we will be comfortable even then. We've had two losses just since July though so we are cautious.

You should do as you like. I don't say this to scare you but I saw a heartbeat at 6.5 weeks in November and then at 9 weeks found out there was no more heartbeat. I would wait but there is nothing wrong with telling anyone you want whenever you want.

makeoutside7

I told my mom and sisters the day I found out. I told my close friends after the 6.5 heartbeat ultrasound. We just told my husband's family this week after our 12.5 week US. We will be announcing it on social media this weekend I think. Last time we made the mistake of telling a lot of people and then there was no HB at our 8 week US. Untelling people was really hard. So this time we are more cautious and waited until after 12 weeks.

kwink86

I agree it is a personal decision. We are planning on telling our parents on Mother's day, we will be starting 14 weeks. Our next appointment is on the 12th and as long as everything goes great, we will start telling everyone else the following weekend.

YummeeCookee

I had my NT on Monday, since that turned out great, I started telling close friends this week. I was going to wait til Mother's Day (when I next see everyone) to tell my family, although my Dad and parents in law already know.

OP- you have to think of it this way: most of the traditional reasoning to not tell too soon is because you want to feel comfortable that its a sure thing and all is looking healthy. For me, it was a matter of thinking that if things did not go well, who would I want to be supporting me and will I feel comfortable telling others bad news. I am private and have done past grieving on my own. So we waited to tell our parents until after the initial appointment, after we saw a heartbeat. As already mentioned, having a good NT made me feel secure in telling close friends. By the time I get to extended family, employer, everyone else, I'll be in 2nd tri.

Good luck w whatever you choose.