Secondary IF

February book club discussion The Four Agreements

pettycrockerpettycrocker member
edited February 2015 in Secondary IF
What did you think of the book? How would you rate it on a scale from 1 to 5 (5 is best) 

What message did you take away from this book and do you think it will help you to better deal with 2IF in the future? 

Favorite quotes from the book? 



March book is The Five Languages of Love By Gary Chapman! 


Spontaneous pregnancy #1
DD1 July 31, 2011

Trying for #2 since Oct 11
732973 Clomid Cycles
2 IUIs 
3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



BabyFruit Ticker

Re: February book club discussion The Four Agreements

  • Did anyone finish the book in time?? I think we're going to do 6wk book clubs instead of 4.  We seem to be having a hard time getting our shit together lol... I am gonna try to finish the book this weekend  #-o


    Spontaneous pregnancy #1
    DD1 July 31, 2011

    Trying for #2 since Oct 11
    732973 Clomid Cycles
    2 IUIs 
    3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
    Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
    Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
    Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
    Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I didn't start it until last weekend because I was in the middle of another book. I keep falling asleep at night and only took the metro once this week. I will be done it tonight. Sorry.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
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  • Sorry late to the discussion.  I can't do this from mobile and have trouble getting on the computer (DH steals mine a lot) ;)

    What did you think of the book? How would you rate it on a scale from 1 to 5 (5 is best).  I would give it a 3.  I agreed with some of it and disagreed with other parts.  The writing was choppy and seemed simple but then I had trouble following other parts and found myself having to reread parts over again.  Maybe that was the point and I missed it?

    What message did you take away from this book and do you think it will help you to better deal with 2IF in the future?  The take home message I got is to love yourself and treat yourself kindly.  I think all of the agreements go back to that.  2IF makes it very hard for us to feel successful and that we deserve to love ourselves and be kind to ourselves.  I know this is something I struggle with a lot and something that I need to work on.

    Favorite quotes from the book? "Whatever life takes away from you, let it go.  When you surrender and let go of the past, you allow yourself to be fully alive in the moment.  Letting go of the past means you can enjoy the dream that is happening right now.  If you live in a past dream, you don't enjoy what is happening right now because you will always wish it to be different than it is.  There is no time to miss anyone or anything because you are alive.  Not enjoying what is happening right now is living in the past and being only half alive.  This leads to self-pity, suffering, and tears.  You were born with the right to be happy.  You were born with the right to love, to enjoy and to share your love  You are alive, so take your life and enjoy it."  This resonates so much with me.  I would love to give my daughter a sibling, but sometimes I worry that in 5, 10, 15 years or whatever I will look back and not remember or have good memories of her childhood.  Especially if she never gets a sibling.  I need to focus on the present moment and finding joy in what I do have.


    Me: 31     DH: 33
    Dx: Me: Recurrent Pregnancy Loss; DH: Low Morphology (2%)
    BFP#1: MC 3/1/11 at 6w1d - EDD 10/21/11
    BFP#2: 5/3/11 - EDD 1/9/12 - DD Born 1/6/12
    image
    TTC #2 since 12/13
    BFP#3: MC 2/8/14 at 4w5d - EDD 10/13/14
    BFP#4: MC 5/6/14 at 4w4d - EDD 1/9/15
    BFP#5: MMC discovered 8/4/14 at 9w1d - D&C 8/5/14 - Baby Boy with Trisomy 16 (maternal origin) - EDD 3/8/15
    BFP#6: CP 11/6/14 at 4w2d - EDD 7/14/15
    IVF #1 with ICSI & PGS: May/June 2015, ER 6/3/15, 17R/17M/15F
    IVF #2 with ICSI & PGS: July 2015, ER 7/16/15, 16R/11M/9F
    PGS results = 6 normal embryos (4 boys, 2 girls)
    FET 9/23/15 = BFFN
    Natural FET 11/4/15 = BFP!
    Beta 9dp5dt = 92

  • Okkkkkk! I FINALLY finished the book! I am giving it a 2. It was so redundant for me. I kept waiting for it to get good and it just missed the mark for me. There were some good parts and I liked the whole idea of the book but I just didn't like the way it was written.



    I have no quotes because I felt like I had to force myself to even finish the book, I couldn't bring myself to highlight a single paragraph.


    Spontaneous pregnancy #1
    DD1 July 31, 2011

    Trying for #2 since Oct 11
    732973 Clomid Cycles
    2 IUIs 
    3 Fresh IVFs= 1 Ectopic treated with MTX
    Spontaneous pregnancy #2= Ectopic #2= lost left tube
    Spontaneous pregnancy #3= DD2 January 29, 2016
    Spontaneous pregnancy #4= Ectopic #3
    Spontaneous pregnancy #5= Baby #3 is a BOY!!! 



    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I finished it on the metro this morning. Ehh. I really disliked the writing, but liked the message, so 2.

    I took away being more proactive in letting things go and moving on. I tend to dwell on the past and tale everything personally (so that section really stuck with me) and it affectes my whole day, week, etc. Will it help me with IF? Maybe. I tend to blame my current IF on L, who of course had no purpose to creating my issues, but she was the cause of them. It makes me sad that I think like that sometimes, but I don't think I project that to her; it is a bottled up deep dark feeling type of thing. If I could just let it go, I would probably be a better mother. 

    I don't think I could pinpoint a favorite quote, books don't stick to me like that. I am not a quoter. Sorry.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
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