Mommy Fail — The Bump
August 2014 Moms

Mommy Fail

i just don't know what to do. My LO went from months of waking every hour, to sleeping 4 hour chunks in the Merlin Magic Slee Suite, to now sleeping like 2-3 1/2 hours then waking up and demanding to be nursed back to sleep or his will screams and cry for hours (while I'm trying so hard to rock him back to sleep). I'm not for crying it out (when it goes on so long), he sleeps in our room, and I'm fine with nursing but every 4 hours. That's how he eats during the day. Anyways this is more of a vent. I just feel like a failure at night because I hate the crying and I pick him up.

Last night I put him down at 7:45. He was asleep. He woke up at 8 and cried till I rocked him to sleep. Then slept till 10:30. Well since it hadn't been 4 hours I tried to get him back to sleep....2 hours later her finally went back to sleep. I just kept rocking him as he fought me but I felt like if I gave in and nursed then he would know that if he throws a fit he will eventually get nursed :( so he gave in at 12:30. Slept till 3:30 then nursed and woke at 6:30.

I know I need to work on sleeping but it's hard when I have to work. Ok I'm done with my rant. I'm just trying to hang in there and begin baby steps to sleep training.

Thanks for listening :)

PS if I would of just nursed at 10:30 it would of all be solved :(

Re: Mommy Fail

  • One more thing, just to get it off my chest, my PED is annoying. She keeps telling me to feed him more and so yesterday he ate 2 ice cubes worth of squash with oatmeal at 6;00 and nursed both sides at 7 before sleeping. It makes no difference becAuse I failed as a mom and haven't taught him how to go to sleep on his own :(....

    My PED makes me feel even more like a failure
  • I nurse and rock to sleep as well, so I guess I'm failing with you :)
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  • My LO STTN a majority of nights... So I can't sympathize there. However, I do have a cluster feeder on my hands and I am constantly feeding him all day, no schedule. Which leads me to my question. Do you think your LO is waking up because he actually hungry or do you think he's just up and you're comfort nursing to get back to sleep?
    As I mentioned, my LO cluster feeds all day and I can't imagine not feeding him knowing he's hungry just to get on a schedule. It seems to me that you're doing the right thing if he's actually hungry...
    I think sleep training worked for me but it is easier when babies are older and you filter out why they are waking up.
  • A friend of mine has a son who's 2 months older than DS and she said the 6 month growth spurt was huge! I mentioned that DS had recently gone from eating every 3 hours at night to every 2 and she said that her son increased his night time feedings from for about a month at around this age, grew a ton, and then started STTN on his own! She said try to wait it out and did not recommend trying to cut back on feedings at this age!
  • I don't mind feeding him at all. I definitely don't want him to go hungry but I don't think he is hungry more at night then during the day. When he wakes after an hour or two hours it's just cause he doesn't know how to get himself back to sleep without nursing or rocking. He just loves for me to hold him. And I know he's teething and in pain. So I don't mind but I guess I'm just so tired that some nights I just don't get it :(

    Also it's so hard to believe you are doing the right things when everyone is doing something a little different. I'm such a schedule and planner person that learning to go with the flow or with my gut is killing me :)

    Being a mom is so tough. And all in all I have such a good baby. He's easy going but he just has rough nights sometimes.
  • I hear you on rough nights!! I know we were both using the merlin suit, our guy just rolled over in it so we're transitioning yet again! My ped is the opposite though. She believes a parent should respond to all cries and feeding is normal at this age during the night. However, she does say to limit him to every 3-4 hrs for food at night, like you said so he's not eating more at night than during the day. If he wakes other times his pacifier ir soothing usually does it. Not quite the same boat, but we're up on average 3-4x a night still here.
  • Thanks everyone for sharing. It's nice to know I'm not alone. :)
  • I wish I had some advice but my dd sttn from day one. I think God blessed us with that with everything we have gone thought with her. Don't feel like a failure because you are not. Do what feels right for your LO and you.


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  • My LO will be 7 months this Tuesday and just started waking up the past few nights to eat at night. She has been STTN since around 7 weeks so this middle of the night feeding is exhausting. I feel like she's gotten so much bigger the past 3 days! She's also not taking long naps like she had been at daycare.

    I'm hoping my good sleeper will come back!!
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  • Don't be so hard on yourself. The Mommy life is the toughest job on earth.
    Just do what is right for you and your baby. And if that means giving in...all you are teaching little one is that mama is there when baby needs you.
  • The sleeping is now getting worse and worse. He is a little constipated now from the oatmeal/iron. He was trying to poop at 3:00 and woke every hour before that probably cause his tummy hurt :( his poop is soft but he has to push it out. Ahh!! The juggle of sleep, solids, and all these changed have me feeling so exhausted.
  • Sounds like a rough night! I think we are in the throws of growth spurt and teething so I feel you on the "getting worse not better" scenario. I am planning to ask for an early mother's day gift in the form of a keurig so I can get a quick cup of coffee in the morning to wake up. Still survival mode!! Hope tonight us better for you!
  • @blondee4685 I'm going to try oatmeal with my little dude this week and I remember how it got my little girl constipated and friend of mine said to mix it with P's: pears, prunes, peach, etc to help with constipation. I'm going to try pears since he's tried that fruit already. Today is rest day of solids and breastmilk only because his poops are thicker and he's getting a little rash because of it.
  • Great advice.
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