Made my mom cry last night...whoops (long)

beffysky

So my 29th b-day is coming up in a few weeks.   A normal b-day celebration in my family requires EVERYONE getting together, including my IL's to have a big dinner, do gifts, etc.  I was deluded enough to think that I'd be PG by my B-day, as by then it will be 5 months TTC (I know, still very normal to NOT be PG, but I was hopeful).  With my long cycles I still won't even be finished the 4th by then! 

 So I told DH that I did not want to do anything for b-day except something small w/him.  My mom calls yesterday to set a date to do my b-day celebration.  I told her I didn't feel like doing anything, that DH will be away on my actual b-day and I'll just have dinner that night with her and my dad.  Mom launches into some guilt trip about not celebrating w/my brother, SIL and nieces, or DH's family.  She literally spends 6-7 minutes re-asking the same questions as if I'll have a different answer.  Asks "Are you mad at somone?"  No mom, I just don't want to do anything.

THEN she goes into the guilt about how it's a very special day for her, and she wants to celebrate it.  Yes, I know it's special to you mom, and that without you such a day would not exist, but HELLO it's my birthday, respect what I choose!  She goes all silent on the phone (I think she's hung up on me) and insted I hear her sniffling and whimpering.  "Anything else?" I ask.   No, she says, "I guess I don't have anything left to say."

 PSA ladies, don't do the motherly guilt thing with our kids!

Melaina25

Tell your Mom she should be happy she gets to see you at all on your birthday.  I haven't spent I birthday with my mom since 2004 and not with my Dad since 2002, so if you don't want to schlep the whole family out that's ok!

Melaina25

PS- Is your picture the KoolAid man or a college mascot?

beffysky

Melaina25:

PS- Is your picture the KoolAid man or a college mascot?

Ha--it's a mascot--Otto the Orange from Syracuse

Melaina25

Ahh looks a bit like this all smushed up and tiny

gingerfamily

If it is tradition to spend the day with your entire family I can see why she'd be disappointed if you didn't this year.  She is just being your mom and being concerned. 

I always send my mom flowers on my birthday.  It's my way of thanking her for bringing me into the world.

Rachel&Joe

Obviously it's your birthday and you can do what you choose, but...  If I were you, I would want to celebrate my birthday to the fullest.  It might be your last one before you are a mom.  If it takes you a long time to get pg and you are already getting bitter about it, it's going to be a long road for you.  Do not let this bring you down.