@lorindriel nailed it. I hate when people randomly pop in to share their sob story thinking that will make it ok that they're trying to dictate how people should post when it's a public forum. Everyone has their own struggles. Jaspersmommy33, These ladies you're talking about who have all this support or have it "easier than you" have their own bad times they're going through. So don't think for a second just because you're 19 and don't have the greatest support system you're going through worse things than the rest of us.
If you don't believe in it why are you continuing to support it with your presence?
Why do we care?
Ok miss plant, let me break this down for you.
Almost 9 months ago a community of women who would birth their children in March of 2015 started getting pregnant. They came to this forum over the course of the last NINE MONTHS and formed bonds, made connections, HELPED and SUPPORTED each other, gave advice, shared the ups and downs of life and loss. We laughed and cried together and we loved this placed housed on the Bump. Many of the women had been here for years, shared birth and loss stories, helped other struggle through trying to conceive, cluster feeding, marital difficulties, hard times, bad baby showers, and avoiding terrible name choices. Six years some women had been here helping each other.
Then the Bump aka XO Corp aka a company that while they may mildly care about our lives wasn't actually ingrained into the community and did not care about our daily symptoms and our losses decided they wanted a change. Because they didn't like us. Because we were deterring them from making more money and competing with new apps that, I can confirm, did not have near the traffic or community loyalty the bump had. Over the course of about six months to a year, they made a series of BUSINESS decisions that negatively impacted the community.
Then, recently, they set fire to it. They destroyed the foundation of our 9-month established support system. They got rid of a core group of people who have their time to work for free and labelled them as trolls and bad apples because they wanted clarification and questioned things they knew would hurt their community of moms and dads. They deleted whole forums, long histories of people's pain and loss and the memorials and outpouring of support and love to their angel babies. They deleted their most active forum and called it a "hacking" to calm us down. They fired all the hard working volunteers that kept their safe space for them thanklessly for years and replaced them with corporate drones. They didn't tell use to leave but they sure as hell booted a number of people out and showed us the door.
If you want to know why we stick around and are so bitter about it, that's why. Because we had an amazing group here with some lovely ladies I'm sad you'll never meet and they burnt it to the ground. I don't know any of these women now, you included, and most of them just come here on their phones to use us as their personal Doctor Google when they should be getting this information from their OB/Midwife nurse line, a doula, a good maternity book, or their moms. And if your OB or Midwife told you an app forum was an ok place to get medical advice I will eat my hat.
This used to be a community of women who shared their lives and now it's a haven for one-timer single question nonsense, where saying Aww and sugar coating life is emphasized. I'm not digging it. I don't want what from people in real life, why the eff would I go online to get it?
[ insert mic drop here ]
Thank you so much for explaining this. I wasn't very active the first couple months and when I started reading the forums I could not figure out why so many people here seemed so angry, I knew there must be a good reason but didn't want to dredge up hurt and pain during an already difficult /exciting time for so many. I'm glad to be able to understand it now.
Re: Pain after sex?