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January 2015 Moms
idontevenknow
member
Baby Blues Check In
idontevenknow
member
Hey guys, this Check In is in response to the Baby Blues thread posted yesterday. How is a Sunday check in for everyone? - I'm hoping for everyone's sake that it won't be needed for long. I am on the app 99% of the time, so bare with me in regards to grammar, spelling and all of that jazz. Now let's get down to the nitty gritty- and feel free to recommend questions.
When was your baby born?
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
Are your blues triggered by anything?
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
Have you found ways to cope?
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
Anything you'd like to add?
When was your baby born?
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
Are your blues triggered by anything?
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
Have you found ways to cope?
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
Anything you'd like to add?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Baby Blues Check In
1/8
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
At least once a day.
Are your blues triggered by anything?
Not consistently. ..
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
Sadness, fear and anxiety....producing lots of tears.
Have you found ways to cope?
Getting out has helped a lot. Just feeling the outside air gives me some kind of relief. And shopping.
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
Very. He tries to lift me up, and tries to get me to talk about what I am feeling.
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
yes- she's 11 and I just keep thinking about how fast time has flown since she was this baby's age... I guess that's a trigger for me. I can't even think about it without crying. Also, her behavior freaks me the fk out, making matters worse.
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
At this point no, I'm waiting for 14 days to pass... then if things haven't gotten better, I will contact my doctor.
Anything you'd like to add?
I've read that on top of helping with lactation, brewers yeast and wheat germ help with baby blues.... it's worth a shot.
Dec 19th
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
Mine is the worse at night.
Are your blues triggered by anything?
I won't really say my "blues", but the anxiety is usually brought on by the crying. I feel like failing at BF for the second time makes my depression worse.
What are your feelings when the blues occur? Hopeless and with a strong sense of impending doom
Have you found ways to cope? Sometimes I cry too and just talk to him and tell him I'm sorry that I don't know what to do to help. Other times I just lay him in his bouncer or bed and walk outside for a few minutes.
Is your SO (or family members) supportive? DH tries to help, he just doesn't understand it. I just remind him that it's all hormonal and I won't be like this forever and mainly that its not his fault.
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way? Yes, DD is 4 and she is feeling a little neglected and had been extra fussy and more clingy. She is also acting out which is making things harder for me. Her and DS need to time their fits so it happens all at once. I feel like once I get one settled down, the other one starts in.
Have you sought professional help, or do you plan to? For now I am doing okay on my own. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for years, and I know at what point, I need to seek professional help. I also trust my DH to tell me when I'm getting to the point that I need help if I don't recognize it.
Anything you'd like to add?
Thank you @idontevenknow for starting this.
Also, what is it about your 11y/o behavior that freaks you out? I don't even want to think about my DD as a preteen.
I have mixed feeling about going out in public. It's exciting for me to get out of the house, but then once I'm out and around people, I can't wait to get back home. It's a double edged sword.
My DD is a caring girl, and I love her so much!! but she is moody and self righteous right now- with a mix of fibs galore... I've clearly done something wrong with her. Also, social freaking media. I allow her to have KIK and Pinterest, but just the other day I found snapchat on her tablet and... ugh. There goes her tablet privleges for a month- might I add that this has happened before and apparently taking the device away for an extended period of time was not a hard enough lesson. We are a mess.
Anyway- do you have any walking trails in your area? A park or quiet mall that u can go to before they open- just to walk? Our family took a long walk today and I feel good tonight.
While my dd is giving me a hard time, I think having a LO under 6 and a newborn has got to be SOO tough!
I think it's a good thing that we can say we know our anxiety or sadness is caused by the hormones and know it will pass. I like to think that's a step in the right direction and am hoping this might mean it won't lead to PPD...
I also get the sense of impending doom... it scares me!! I don't know what to do about it.
How often are you having bouts of the blues? At least once a day
Are your blues triggered by anything?
Not really... Just thinking about how I am the only one who can feed him and worrying about if my daughter feels she is getting enough attention.
What are your feelings when the blues occur?see above. I also cry tears of joy at how special my little guy is....
And now much I love my husband.
Have you found ways to cope?
TV, online shopping
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?yes
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way? Just worried she feels left out
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?noy right now
Anything you'd like to add?
I really wish my BMB had done something like this when I had DD 4 years ago. I feel like it helps knowing I'm not alone and have people to talk to who are going through it simultaneously.
It just seems like a lifetime away right now.
Be the worst... lack of sleep does not help.
I feel like I'm always one handed as well, thats what's making checking in with y'all difficult- plus, I'm always mobile... which is ridiculous. I hope today and tonight was/is good to everyone.
@saiven I'm glad u are talking it out with your SO. I know that helps a bit.
@ACH831, Are you afraid to talk about your blues? I know with me, I am afraid to talk to anyone because I might burst into tears talking about it and I hate crying in front of others. SO sees me cry and makes me talk.... which is annoying because I can't talk when I cry, but helpful.
I've been taking issue with the fact that I am no longer pregnant... anyone else? My maternity clothes make me sad, and I feel selfish thinking that way.
I also feel more traumatized by all of this as a settled, successful 30 year old than I was when my first came out at 18. Idk, it's weird.
I'm glad I'm not alone, @papapalie. I was at Target the other day and had the same feelings.
Dec 23rd
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
Atleast once a day
Are your blues triggered by anything?
Usually when LO is crying and DD1 is throwing a fit and I'm alone.
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
Overwhelmed, stressed, inadequate
Have you found ways to cope?
Sometimes I just have to step outside and sit alone for a few minutes
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
I don't think H realizes there's anything wrong. He just thinks I'm irritable... Or tired
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
DD1 isn't getting as much attention as she needs, and I feel terrible. But when the baby is crying and gassy and all I can do is walk around with her and bounce and try to soothe her, she comes in wanting attention and I tell her to go play in her room. I hate it an I feel bad, but sometimes I just can't...
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
I don't think it's so bad for professional help, but having someone to talk to would help
Anything you'd like to add?
Sometimes I think most of my frustration is more towards H. I know he works all day, but when I spend all day and most of the evening trying to soothe LO while she screams, he could put the damn video game down and take a turn for 10 mins!!!
January 11
How often are you having bouts of the blues? 2-3times a day, sometimes less sometimes more
Are your blues triggered by anything?
LO crying, tv commercial, singing to LO, reading to LO
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
Sadness, inadequacy, no real feeling just sometimes start to cry
Have you found ways to cope?
Talking to H and mom
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
SUPER SUPPORTIVE
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
FTM
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
if it gets bad enough, yes
Anything you'd like to add?
Thank you for starting this thread, it's been nice to read that I'm not alone in this
I don't have an outside baby yet, but I'm already feeling sad about not being pregnant. This is my last pregnancy, and I wasn't even able to enjoy it like I wanted to.
I'm going to miss my pregnant belly, and all the movement the most I think. I'm so sad I'll never experience this again.
I've only got a matter of days left, (if that) and I'm trying to savor every last second.
I'm excited for him to be here, but I'm not excited that my pregnancy is about to end.
I really hope I can come to terms with this. It's really difficult for me!
I think I'm just lonely and could use a visitor or to get out of house. But I'm so protective of my baby and worried about germs.... Not sure how to conquer this fear. I may end up staying inside until April when I have to go back to work.
January 20
How often are you having bouts of the blues? A couple of times a day
Are your blues triggered by anything?
When I think how fast everything is going I was just pregnant two weeks ago and now I'm adjusting to two beautiful lil girls which can be nerve wrecking. Also the thought of my husband going back to work tomorrow night
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
I start crying just start feeling down and like nothing excites me which I have no idea y. This should be exciting time right now.
Have you found ways to cope?
Talking to my husband, mom and best friends. Also thinking positive that this will pass its just hormones after birth.
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
Very
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way?
Just when I look at my four year daughter I realize that my newborn is gonna grow fast and it makes me cry
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
Not yet if I still feel like this in a month I will talk to my doctor and go back to therapy.
Anything you'd like to add?
I have a history of anxiety and depression before I got pregnant I was on medication but stopped.
Also thank u for this check in. It makes me feel better that I'm not alone on this.
Thank u for listening it feels better to let everything out and about.
1/20
How often are you having bouts of the blues?
1-3 times a day
Are your blues triggered by anything?
Sometimes nursing triggers them but often times it's random.
What are your feelings when the blues occur?
I feel useless. I feel like I'm not a good enough mother or wife. I feel guilty over dumb things (I had a meltdown the other day because I ate the last of the cheese-its and that must make me a bad wife because DH might have wanted some) I feel down about my appearance.
Have you found ways to cope?
So far the only thing I do is tell DH that 'I need a hug.' It's more or less a code for 'I'm about to break down.' He'll come cuddle me wherever I'm at and let me just cry it out on his shoulder. He'll reassure me that he loves me and that I'm doing a great job and he'll offer to get me something to drink or eat afterwards. He's my everything.
Is your SO (or family members) supportive?
My DH is the only one who knows and he is there for me 100%. I'm terrified of what will happen when he goes back to work.
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to?
Not yet, but I will if this doesn't get any better in the next week or two.
Anything you'd like to add?
I really don't want to air my dirty laundry but I will just say that I'm going through something very very difficult right now as a result of something I did in the past. DH has been incredibly forgiving and wonderful but the next couple weeks may be a little rocky for me which makes things even more difficult.
When was your baby born? 1/22
How often are you having bouts of the blues? Usually once a day
Are your blues triggered by anything? Breastfeeding (or shall I say lack there of). When people make it seem like breastfeeding is what good moms do just kills me.
What are your feelings when the blues occur? Helpless and like a failure. This is probably my last baby and I wanted to BF badly and set myself up for success from the beginning only to be failing.
Have you found ways to cope? Crying
Is your SO (or family members) supportive? My DH is supportive but I haven't really opened up to him about it. I try to cry when no one is watching. I want him to think I am strong but he knows I am sad.
If you are a STM, are your other kids affecting your blues in any way? I have 2 other kids. I Try NOT to cry in front of them so I think they are okay at this point.
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to? If it keeps up I will. I can't let this effect my kids.
How often are you having bouts of the blues? Once or twice a day. Sometimes just for a few minutes at a time and once it lasted an hour or two.
Are your blues triggered by anything?
The time of day, usually evening/night time.
What are your feelings when the blues occur? Anxiety, grief, guilt.
Have you found ways to cope? Turning in some happy MUSIC, singing, dancing!
Is your SO (or family members) supportive? Yes
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to? No and not yet. I will wait and see how it goes.
Edit to say, there is no shame in crying. Let it go, you will feel so much better knowing that DH can see how you feel.
Is anyone feeling better? My LO is now 3 weeks old and I am feeling better... anxiety is still there, but the bouts of crying have left for the most part. It does get better- it will get better.
When was your baby born? Jan. 22
How often are you having bouts of the blues? The past 2 days have been pretty bad. Yesterday it was off and on all day.
Are your blues triggered by anything?
Breastfeeding and my mom going home tomorrow.
What are your feelings when the blues occur? Anxiety, grief, guilt. I was unable to breastfeed my daughter for very long and was hoping this time would go better. It seems to be in most ways but my nipples are extremely cracked and bleeding and I can't reach the LC for our hospital. I feel extreme guilt over my feelings of wanting to give up so I'm trying to stick it out.
Have you found ways to cope? Crying and distraction
Is your SO (or family members) supportive? Yes, but my husband is starting to get upset seeing me so upset and told me he doesn't care how the baby gets fed and wants me to be less stressed.
If you are a STM, are your other kids affected by your blues in any way?
My 3 year old has seen me crying several times and brings me tissues. I wish I could hide it from her bc I know it upsets her.
Have you seeked professional help, or do you plan to? No and not yet. I'm hoping it'll start to pass. I had post partum anxiety and a little depression with my first so I already see a therapist.