Well, don't just lay there like a bump on a log...

littlemissmarla

Does anyone else find themselves feeling guilty if your not interacting with LO constantly? Right now i'm struggling with trying to find a balance between how much time I should give DD to experience things on her own vs. how much "structured" play (as structured as it could be).

I feel as though if i'm not there waving around toys, reading or helping her on her tap a tune piano she will just lay there like a bump on a log. I know babies need downtime and to not be overstimulated but sometimes when I lay her down on her mat and put out some toys she will just ignore them and lay around which then makes me think she's bored and I head right over to entertain her. 

I'm also getting concerned that she hasn't even been attempting to roll because we don't leave her down for long periods of time to even try. She will hang out in her crib for awhile before or after naps and she will sway side to side but nothing significant. I'll bring it up to our pedi tomorrow at her appt.

I'm home with DD right now and whenever I have something else to do I get pretty guilty about not being there to keep her company or show her new things. For any other FTM or STM .. how much "alone" time do your babies get and does anyone feel the same kind of guilt I have been experiencing?

nolemomma14

I've felt guilty about this before too. I felt like I should be doing something with DS every minute, but I've gotten better about letting him check things out for himself. He will be 6 months next week, and he just started rolling 2 weeks ago. He went from showing zero interest in even trying to roll, to now rolling all over the place. I'm sure once your DD figures it out, she will be too!

How much "alone" time he gets is different everyday. Somedays he's content to just lay by himself and look and reach for his toys while I'm doing something nearby, and other days he gets mad if I set him down and walk away to do something. Does she have a jumper or exersaucer? DS loves his, and before he started rolling "played" much better in there than on his mat.

I try not to feel guilty about doing stuff other than playing with him. There's stuff around the house, that I know needs to be done, so if he's able to entertain himself for a little bit, I take full advantage and work on those things!

honeybee434

I will sit DD on the floor with her toys and she will always let me know if she's had enough and is bored by getting fussy and wanting attention. Sometimes she just needs a you moved closer and other times she wants me to sit down with her or hold her. I think if yours wasn't happy with being where you put him that he would most definitely let you know! Some babies are probably more content with just "sitting there" than others.

bullybutt

Meh, STM, so I will just plop DD on the floor (she sits) and throw down a bunch of toys for her.  She will grab whatever fancies her and move on to another one.  I will do this when I need to get the house picked up.  I also will lay her on her belly to get her ready for the crawling phase but she usually gets to squawking and wants to be picked up.  She also has her jumper that I'll put her in and she plays/tries to cram all the things in her mouth.   

ADC1979

I feel that way all the time.  It's hard because LO is in daycare, so I feel like every waking moment he's with me, we need to be doing something.  Even though I know that's not realistic or necessary.  His dad is good at just hanging out with him on the couch.  Me?  If we're on the couch we should be reading or he should have a toy or something.  

Mommy guilt to the fullest.

littlemissmarla

@babybell22‌ haha that is so funny! The bump knows what I'm thinking!

@nolemomma14‌ She does have an exersaucer that she plays in for a bit. I finally really left her alone in it yesterday to start cooking dinner. I was watching her on the monitor and at first she just looked around but after awhile she was grabbing and exploring all the stuff .. I was so proud LOL.

I'm glad to hear other moms give their LOs some "alone" time.

I'm going to work on letting her have some free play and go by her cues, she tends to grunt when she gets upset so I'll try waiting before I head over to entertain her.

It's also always good to hear reminders that LOs develop at their own pace, I'm need to keep reminding myself that!

livkight

I was just thinking about this today! My DD is really content to be on her tummy, on her back, in her jumperoo, whatever. Sometimes I worry that I don't "do" enough with her throughout the day, though we do go for walks, read books, etc. I'm taking a class online, so between that and everything else to manage throughout the day, I do what I can with her and she just goes with the flow for the most part. I'm glad she's so ok on her own, since I'll be even more occupied in about 7 months! :P

Nicole3&counting

Just remember that alone time gives her the opportunity to develop her imagination. If you have s bouncer, exersauer iu play gym use those at diffent times of the day. I will out H in her high chair with a few toys to play with ad well. She will let you know when she needs you! Otherwise let her play!!

Jordanjkmr

I find having siblings around the baby eases the mommy guilt. I may not interact with LO constantly but he is always watching and learning, whether it is his brothers playing, me folding laundry, or the family eating supper. He is part of a bigger group and there is always someone or something to entertain him. And when he is alone for whatever reason, I just feel happy for him that he has a break from the insanity.

It was a lot harder when I had one and he would play on the floor and I would read a book on the couch. The quiet in the room made me feel like I should do or say something even though LO was content. I think that is a huge reason why I find staying home with 2 or 3 is much more enjoyable than 1 ever was.

PregsMcSnoozalot

I say count yourself lucky!    My LO demands to be entertained at all times!!!  If you put him down to play he's all like, "excuse me?!  Ummm, get over here!"  8-}

ChrisB

I love the title of this thread!

Yes, I've had the same guilty feelings almost daily. Always thought I had to be rightthere beside him all the time. I've realized that it's good for them to learn how to entertain themselves, and it's good for me too! 

Artistmom30

With my first, I was very attachment parenting driven. I held DD all the time and felt horribly guilty when I did not, or when I didn't play with her. With DS, I am still geared towards attachment parenting but am more relaxed. I leave him on the floor more often to build strength in sitting up, put him in his exosaucer to play and in his Johnny jumper. I know he needs to be out of my arms to have time to develop his skill set. I love holding him but he doesn't need me 24/7.

BBColt78

Well lady, you know I am STM too and I remember those days. Second baby has more alone time, but Brielle is not much into being on her own. This is where baby wearing is amazeballs. She loves a sling hip carry it the Ergo back carry:)

argonne

DD gets put on our rug with some toys. They don't need huge amounts of interaction for play.  She lets me know when she's bored, but she mostly enjoys it. 

She kind of half-way sits, but she spends most of the time on her belly moving around.  She's up on all fours and rocking and she will army crawl/inch worm to where she wants to go.  I would expect crawling shortly.