I've got the baby-weaning blues

AmyP523

Ok, just need to vent a bit to some fellow mamas....

My 5 1/2 month old son has pretty severe eczema and recently his condition has been flaring up.  He's also developed other troubling symptoms, including lack of weight gain, irritability/sleeplessness and increased spitting up.  We had a doctor's appointment yesterday, and the doctor strongly recommended that we immediately switch him to a soy-based formula, along with Benadryl 3 times per day and some topical steroids to help with the redness and itching.  I asked if eliminating dairy/milk protein from my diet would allow me to continue to breastfeed, but the doctor really felt like even that may not be enough, and that at nearly 6 months, he had gotten all of the major health benefits of breastfeeding, and that this would be a good time to transition him over, as we also prepare to introduce solids in a couple weeks.  

I have very mixed feelings about weaning.  In some ways, it's a relief that I won't be solely responsible for feeding my baby which has been hugely stressful, and that formula will allow us much greater flexibility in feeding him.  I won't have to abstain from foods or drinks that could affect the breast milk, and I won't have to tote my pump around everywhere I go.  I also know that eliminating milk protein will help him to be a healthier, happier baby, and that he may actually start sleeping through the night- which means my husband and I may be able to sleep through the night (the sleep deprivation was doing a number on my emotional well-being and my relationship with my husband...I'm not very nice when I'm overtired.)

Physically, I'm uncomfortable and engorged (despite short pumping sessions every few hours to relieve some of the fullness), and I've been noshing on York peppermint patties and taking tylenol for the discomfort.  I know it's temporary, but the physical & emotional effects are wreaking havoc on me.  I know I didn't do anything wrong, or fail as a mother because I'm not able to breastfeed to a year (my initial goal), but it's still discouraging and hard to come to terms with.

Vent over.  I feel better already

Chichigo

If you don't want to wean, please seek a second opinion. Also, be aware that there is a significant crossover of milk and soy protein intolerance. Many women follow elimination diets and successfully breastfeed.

kwitt22

Your pedi suggested benadryl for a 5 mos old? I would absolutely seek a 2nd opinion. You're not supposed to give benadryl to kids 5 and under. 

Mizuiro007

I'm in a very similar situation. Mine is 13 weeks and has protein sensitivity. Doctor said I can keep breastfeeding as much as he can tolerate between formula (not soy for him but partially hydrolyzed protein) but what's the point when it just makes him sick. I think it's so much harder when you're not ready for it, when it's forced on you like that. As much as breastfeeding stressed me out, I still loved the feeling of feeding my baby and that close contact.

I knew it had nothing to do with anything I had done or didn't do, but I struggled for the longest time (even before we figured out what was happening we knew it was the breastmilk making him sick) I struggled with feeling defective or like a failure. After all, as a mother you should be able to feed your child and here I was making him sick by doing just that. It was devastating. Honestly, I think all that kept be from really sinking into a deep depression is my LO.

Within a few days of moving him to formula he was such a different baby and he's so happy. As soon as he sees me he lights up in this cheesy grin that spreads all the way to his ears and my heart just melts. Even if it wasn't how I'd wanted to feed him, I was doing what was best for him and at some point it just kinda hit me that it didn't matter anymore. I just had to give myself permission to let go of the guilt and move on, for both of us.