I'm only 7w2d. DH and I have only shared the news with my mom and his parents and plan to keep it that way until like February! Well after we had our US and saw the heartbeat, my FIL decided it was safe to share the news with anyone and everyone he saw. Without our permission, he created an email to everyone in his address book and said, "we're going to be grandparents!" :-O He ran into an old H.S. friend of mine (someone I used to date too...) and blurted out the news to him too!!!! ~X( We're from a small town so between his email and sharing the news with Chris, the secret is def out. DH and I are shocked and frustrated but kind of have to accept the reality. Has anyone experience something similar to this? How did you handle it?
Thanks for letting me vent!
"Will you be my Valentine?" 2/14/2004
"Will you marry me?" 7/4/2008
"Wanna get a cat?" 7/4/2010
TTC #1 since 2/2011
Me: 28 DH: 29 2 Cycles Femera, 4 IUIs, IVF#1 (BNF), IVF#2 (BFN).
I am sorry - this sucks. My mom did something similar to me last year when we were pregnant with twins - thankfully only with family though. Sadly and selfishly she did it just to complain with some other people about how DH and I would never be able to handle DD and twins. Unfortunately I miscarried so it was extra frustrating that she told the additional people that I then had to un-tell.
Hang in there. Hopefully as time goes on, you will look back and laugh about it.
Me: 35 DH: 35 - Married 10 years PCOS and MF Two failed rounds IUI in 2010 IVF #1 in 2011 - BFP 8/5/11 - Our IVF miracle was born 4/8/12 FET 9/23/13; BFP -Twins-10/3/13; EDD 6/10/14; MC 11/1/13; D&C 11/4/13 FET 3/28/14; BFN - 4/7/14 IVF #2 - Transfer 2 embryos 11/14/14; BFP 11/24/14 - Beta 265; 11/26/14 - Beta 612; 11/28/14 - Beta 1263; 12/1/14 - Beta 3571; 12/3/14 - first u/s - two gestational sacs; 12/17/14 - two healthy heartbeats (132 and 134) Our IVF miracles were born 7/16/15
It's so frustrating! Since we went through IVF, and half the family contributed money to help us, we didn't have too many family members to surprise. But, when I posted on FB this week, I was really happy to see over a hundred comments and likes from people who had no idea. So, at least maybe you still have that.
I'm sorry - that is frustrating! When I was 6w, a great aunt found out I was pregnant and told the whole extended family - she actually told people we were having twins b/c we did IVF. I was a bit annoyed, but I knew she was just happy for us. I told her if anything happened or if we didn't have twins, she would be designated to give everyone the update.
Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!! Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. My mom and I went through this with previous pregnancies, so with this one she was very well behaved. I only gave her permission to tell people this week! It was hard for her, as she was so excited, as I'm sure is true for your FIL, but this is YOUR news, and he had no right to share it.
***Losses mentioned.*** TTC #1 since May 2012. Me: 37, OH: 41. Ectopic August 2012 => tubal damage. Stage 1 endo removed June 2013. IVF #1 Oct/Nov 2013: Long Lupron with Gonal-F. 7R, 7M, 7F. 2 txfer@3d. Nothing frozen. => M/C @ 8 wks. Selected RPL panel all normal. Very hyper and brittle response to stims. IVF #2 (antagonist protocol) Feb 2014 => Converted to IUI (Perfect conditions). BFN. IVF #2.1 w/ new RE June 2014: Antagonist protocol. 33R, 31M, 30F, 19 blasts to test!!! I made it through without crashing!! Hats off to Dr. Fancypants!! ET of one 5AB blast. BFN. 13 10 CCS'ed snowflakes! FET #1 PUPO as of 7/29 Betas: 8/7@24, 8/9@97, 8/11@334 (etc.) Two sacs on 8/15, one seen on 8/18 after a bleed. U/s 8/25 (6+3) "perfect": 5.9 mm + HB@120bpm! U/s 9/4 (7+6): 15.9 mm + HB@172 bpm! Please, PLEASE stick this time!!!!
Sorry that happened. I guess they're really excited, but nobody ever understands IF brain. I didn't tell my family until 12 weeks with DS and 10 this time. I would've told them sooner this time around (my family.. not the IL's because I know they have BIG... maybe the biggest mouths!!), but we were visiting them so I thought it'd be nice to be able to tell them in person and see their reaction. But I def would've killed them if they'd done that. I would let him know that you didn't plan on telling everybody until further along and ask him to zip his lip (in a nicer way) for now.
MC Sept '10, MC Dec '10, DS born 2012
Clomid + TI = BFP #1 March '13, MC April '13
Gonal F + trigger + IUI #1 = BFP #2 10/21/13, MC 10/31/13
Thanks ladies! We had a good talk with DH's parents this afternoon and asked them politely to zip it from this point forward! They were apolegetic and are just sooo excited! I'd rather have them overly excited than anything else I guess. If it ends in a miscarriage, they are responsible for telling everyone and ensuring I don't get any pity emails too! We'll be keeping this news to ourselves if there's ever a future pregnancy and announcing when and how we want. :-bd
"Will you be my Valentine?" 2/14/2004
"Will you marry me?" 7/4/2008
"Wanna get a cat?" 7/4/2010
TTC #1 since 2/2011
Me: 28 DH: 29 2 Cycles Femera, 4 IUIs, IVF#1 (BNF), IVF#2 (BFN).
Re: Mind a mini vent here?
Hang in there. Hopefully as time goes on, you will look back and laugh about it.
PCOS and MF
Two failed rounds IUI in 2010
IVF #1 in 2011 - BFP 8/5/11 - Our IVF miracle was born 4/8/12
FET 9/23/13; BFP -Twins-10/3/13; EDD 6/10/14; MC 11/1/13; D&C 11/4/13
FET 3/28/14; BFN - 4/7/14
IVF #2 - Transfer 2 embryos 11/14/14; BFP 11/24/14 - Beta 265;
11/26/14 - Beta 612; 11/28/14 - Beta 1263; 12/1/14 - Beta 3571;
12/3/14 - first u/s - two gestational sacs; 12/17/14 - two healthy heartbeats (132 and 134)
Our IVF miracles were born 7/16/15
Me: 40, rheumatoid arthritis, Hashimoto’s, low ovarian reserve
DH: 42, bi-lateral varicocele (corrected in Dec 2013)
2008 Married
2009 Started TTC #1
2012 Hormone studies/ultrasound, HSG, Clomid
BFP ended in MC
2013 3 rounds of Clomid
Hormone studies/ultrasound, SIS, polyp and bicornuate uterus removed
DH varicocelectomy
2014 Hormone studies/ultrasound, HSG, SIS, removed 2nd polyp
IVF #1- retrieved 17, 3 mature for 2 day transfer, BFN
IVF #2- September…our last chance….. retrieved 22, 6 mature blasts, 2 embies transferred, BFP (300 beta) on Oct 1st, Beta #2 675 Oct 3rd, Beta #3 2,484
EDD Twins 06/09/2015
1/30/2015 PPROM at 21 weeks, 3 days. Hospital bed rest to let these sweet peas cook. Holding on for 34 weeks!
Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility
IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN
IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!
Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!
((hugs))
***Losses mentioned.*** TTC #1 since May 2012. Me: 37, OH: 41. Ectopic August 2012 => tubal damage.
MC Sept '10, MC Dec '10, DS born 2012
Clomid + TI = BFP #1 March '13, MC April '13
Gonal F + trigger + IUI #1 = BFP #2 10/21/13, MC 10/31/13
Gonal F + trigger + IUI #2 = BFP #3 1/16/14, ectopic w/ heartbeat & rt salpingectomy 1/29/14
IVF #1 - ER 5/9/14 transfer cx'd due to high P4
FET #1 - 6/26/14 transferred 1 AA blast BFP!! Beta #1 13dp5dt - 1548 Beta #2 15dp5dt - 2748 Beta #3 18dp5dt - 7586