how to stop babysitting — The Bump
June 2015 Moms

how to stop babysitting

DH has a daughter from a previous relationship, his daughter doesn't live with us but has a child who she cannot find care for most weekends and we watch. Well due to the fact that the kid is over we have had to put finishing construction projects on hold, miss my family events and numerous other problems. Dh sees nothing wrong and won't say anything. I'm fed up, and frankly nervous that when I bring home baby she will think since I'm home she can drop her kid off anytime. Which is not the case because I want bonding time with my kid and my husband. But for now we need to start working on our house again to be ready for June. How do I politely tell Dh that this needs to stop/become less frequent and she needs to find a more permanent solution to her babysitting issues?

Re: how to stop babysitting

  • He's your husband. Have an honest and frank discussion with him about your concerns.
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  • I would just tell DH that caring for your own child comes before caring for anyone else's child, even if the other child is family. Since his daughter chose to bring a life into this world, she needs to be responsible for caring for it. It would be good for her to start looking into other options now, while there's not a huge time crunch, so she has a good routine figured out by the time your baby comes.
    housewifebecomeshertaboullio84[Deleted User]mamabearMoni
  • taboullio84taboullio84
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    edited November 2014
    Just seen it was a grandchild. Pfft . say no. .
    Not either of ya'lls responsibility. Sounds like she's using you . no ma'am
  • So it's his grandchild?
    How old is this child?
    Just say no.

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  • Does she just show up at your door unannounced with the child? It sounds like you (or preferably DH) need to explain that you won't be able to watch the grandchild because you are going to be fixing up the house. Is she busy working? Is there a father in the picture? They need to figure out regular child care that doesn't involve you. If your DH won't talk with her, you will have to do it.
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  • Definitely have a talk and put your foot down. Otherwise it will cause a lot of tension between you and hubby, and too much added stress to what seems like an already stressful situation. Construction can be very hectic and difficult to live through, especially when it's on hold and your home is all tossed up in limbo. If you want to compromise you can work with her on specific times you are willing to sit, otherwise just say no! Not worth the stress or the possible strain/resentment building up in your marriage.
    Friends since 2010 Couple since May 2013 Married on September 20, 2014 BFP on Sept 29, 2013 --2 days after returning from our honeymoon! DH has 2 kids, DS 21, and DD 20. I have 1 DD, 9 years old. photo imagejpg1_zps607c3ff5.jpg photo d73df80d-90ce-42a7-9957-d6ba6fc01682_zps6f945c37.jpg

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