@peeppeeppeep I didn't deliver my first here, we were living somewhere else when he was born, although he was also born in a small community hospital it was only 20 miles from a larger one. But many first time moms deliver up here and I think because of the general atmosphere being different they don't have as much fear? I really don't know! I'd love to speak with more FTMs and see what they have to say.
Most women plan to deliver up here, but many do not/cannot. The hospital does have very strict rules. You have to be low risk, not breech in the later part of your pregnancy (although they have dealt with a few flips), not more than a week overdue, no GD, etc. Since many women go overdue they end up getting transferred before they even have the chance. Others choose to make the drive to the bigger city no matter what. And yes, at least 1-2 times a year you hear that so-and-so had her baby at a gas station or one of the resorts along the way because they don't make it, but that's pretty rare. For the most part they either schedule inductions so they are already in town or stay with family/friends for the last week or so. I was actually originally planning to drive back to the hospital my son was born at, which is about 3 hours away, and just stay at our lake cabin for the last couple of weeks, but it won't work with my work schedule to do that. So then we thought we'd just drive down when I go into labor, but after looking at the notes from my first birth my doctor has advised against that. Instead she recommends we come in to the hospital and she'll check me out, and then I can decide if I want to transfer or just birth there. If I transfer she'll actually some with me in the ambulance which makes me feel a lot better. I plan to deliver at the hospital just because it seems easier than dealing with all of that, but ultimately it's my doctor's call.
So we aren't entirely isolated up here, it's just an added step/pain in the ass.
Ah, this all makes a lot of sense. Thanks for taking the time to write out such a detailed response - and I hope all goes smoothly for you!
I went med free the first time and hope to do the same this time around. While many women have perfectly smooth labors with epis, I do know that the trend is that one intervention often leads to another and another. I figured if something didn't go so smoothly that it would just be because of me and the baby, not the fault of an epi administered too early or pitocin, etc.
I was also scared of a catheter and other possible issues like an epi only taking to one side, back pain later on, bfing trouble, etc.
I prepped by reading a ton. I actually did it by having a few coping techniques in mind, not going to the hospital early ( my dr actually had me go to his office, not the hospital), taking it one contraction at a time (you really feel perfectly normal between contractions, it's so crazy), my MIL who was actually amazing (and calming- so out of character), and then just being lucky to have a very low risk pregnancy.
The natural birth board is amazing and was so helpful. I would be glad to share any experiences. This is my my birth story- https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/8356709/very-late-longgg-natural-hospital-birth-story-5-13-12#latest. In my new mother exhaustion, I put my due date, not my sons bday lol!
I tried so hard not to get an epidural with my first delivery, but it just hurt too much. Perhaps I wasn't prepared enough. I often wonder if women experience pain differently because I thought I was dying. I am not trying to scare anyone, but I think I was on the verge of passing out. This time round I plan to approach the delivery the same way and labor as long as I can without the drugs, but won't beat myself up if I succumb to interventions. Good luck!
I tried so hard not to get an epidural with my first delivery, but it just hurt too much. Perhaps I wasn't prepared enough. I often wonder if women experience pain differently because I thought I was dying. I am not trying to scare anyone, but I think I was on the verge of passing out. This time round I plan to approach the delivery the same way and labor as long as I can without the drugs, but won't beat myself up if I succumb to interventions. Good luck!
It could have been back labor! I've heard the baby's position can make all the difference in a painful labor and manageable labor. There's a girl on the NB board who had back labor with her first and it was terrible, then didn't with her second and said she barely noticed the contractions since the pain was so different. Ina May Gaskin also has some theories about this and our general feeling toward labor/delivery and the culture surrounds it. She claims that at The Farm that women experience less pain because they are taught that labor pains are manageable and not to be feared. The psychology behind that is very interesting to think about, but I don't think it's ever been studied and there's a lot of controversy around most of Ina May's theories.
I had a very pleasant delivery but after I remember thinking I felt like I'd been hit by a bus and every muscle in my body was sore. Yet in my cultural anthropology class I remember hearing of a woman who was traveling with her tribe, walked away for about an hour to delivery her baby, then briskly walked to catch back up and keep going. Which she would have done alone if she hadn't invited the anthropologist to join her. That baffled my mind. I could barely get up to take a shower let alone briskly walk over rugged wilderness with a newborn strapped to me chest. And don't even get me started on the first PP poop! Either that woman is a pain management beast or my pain was the result of incorrect birthing techniques or completely psychological.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
My plan is to have a med-free birth. My doctor is completely on-board as long as there are no complications. She only asks that I allow them to put an IV in, just in case they need to get to me quickly. Overall, I am really really happy with her.
I am planning to do the Birth Boot Camp classes. The series I'm looking into starts Jan. 6th and ends Mar. 10th (one week after my due date). That was the closest one I could find to my due date.
@kcbizme I am not trying to be negative but be wary about the IV. You will be essentially strapped to the bed if that's what she requires, and not able to walk around or manage your pain in the shower so it will really work against you if you want to go med free. I forget what it's called but maybe ask her if you can just have the needle in place so you can still walk around to manage your pain.
Many doctors will allow the port to be placed and not start the IV. I will have a port placed but will not be hooked up to any monitors or IVs unless needed. That's standard at my hospital unless there are complication so I will be able to walk, be on my birth ball and in the tub. Definitely ask what your hospital's practices are.
* edit for quote fail*
I specifically told her I want to be able to move around and walk. My interpretation was that she would allow all of that and her only request was the iv, so I would guess she meant the port. I will definitely clarify though.
@kcbizme and @aylacbw - it's called a hep lock. (Don't know why). That's where they put the IV needle in the back of your hand and then seal it and tape it down.
You just tell them to only give you the hep lock and that you want to move around while laboring. If an emergency happens they just pop the cap on the end and voila you're hooked up on the IV.
@EmpireRecords24 I definitely do my faire share of eye rolling with Ina May, too, but I find the psychology side of her book fascinating to think about
I went med free with my first and intend to try and do the same with this one (mostly because I have an irrational fear of epidurals.)
Apparently I'm the only one that HATED the Ina May books. I just couldn't stop rolling my eyes through them.
Haha, I hated the book too! Like, OK, I get that it's a 'magical' experience, but finger painting to get in touch with birth? Really? I had to skip 70% of the book to get to the parts that didn't assume I was so emotionally delicate that a feather could fracture my 'inner self'. So stupid, I'm a woman, not a 4 year old.
As far as the nurses "not allowing" you to do things, screw that noise. You tell them what you will allow them to do. It's your body, they don't have any more authority over it than you. Just educate yourself on procedures during birth, and decide ahead of time what you will allow. For example, if you don't want internal monitoring (requires you to stay stationary and has a chance of membrane rupture) tell them you are not going to allow it. Or if birthing on your back is painful as hell, don't do it. That position is just about their convenience anyway. Screw their convenience, you're the one giving birth.
Just don't be an asshole about it, stay polite, and be firm. Your body, your say.
The birth stories in Ina May's Guide are... interesting. There were a few that were very "Kool Aid"ish. Like the women who just gave birth climbing in bed with the woman in labor, the German couple who just randomly decided to have a baby there without telling anyone back home, etc. Some were probably OK but years later I don't remember those.
But I did love when she explained what certain medical tests were for and why she recommended/did not recommend them. There are some things she does support, it's not all anti-hospital/medical treatment. And the psychology part fascinated me, if you can't tell. I really do believe psychology and culture can affect certain outcomes, not just in birth but life in general, so it was interesting to hear things from birth perspective. I just wish she'd actually get some research-backed studies done to prove/disprove her theories.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
I tried so hard not to get an epidural with my first delivery, but it just hurt too much. Perhaps I wasn't prepared enough. I often wonder if women experience pain differently because I thought I was dying. I am not trying to scare anyone, but I think I was on the verge of passing out. This time round I plan to approach the delivery the same way and labor as long as I can without the drugs, but won't beat myself up if I succumb to interventions. Good luck!
This was me too. I wanted a natural birth first time around but ended up being induced and just couldn't handle the pain. I was really shocked about how intense the pain was. It was kind of discouraging because now I think that maybe my pain threshold is too low for a natural birth but we'll see what happens second time around!
The birth stories in Ina May's Guide are... interesting. There were a few that were very "Kool Aid"ish. Like the women who just gave birth climbing in bed with the woman in labor, the German couple who just randomly decided to have a baby there without telling anyone back home, etc. Some were probably OK but years later I don't remember those.
But I did love when she explained what certain medical tests were for and why she recommended/did not recommend them. There are some things she does support, it's not all anti-hospital/medical treatment. And the psychology part fascinated me, if you can't tell. I really do believe psychology and culture can affect certain outcomes, not just in birth but life in general, so it was interesting to hear things from birth perspective. I just wish she'd actually get some research-backed studies done to prove/disprove her theories.
This is pretty much my reaction 100%. Even though some of it is kool aid ish I still feel like I benefitted from reading it. And I totally agree on research backing her views.
Re: Natural Birth
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
* edit for quote fail*
I specifically told her I want to be able to move around and walk. My interpretation was that she would allow all of that and her only request was the iv, so I would guess she meant the port. I will definitely clarify though.
You just tell them to only give you the hep lock and that you want to move around while laboring. If an emergency happens they just pop the cap on the end and voila you're hooked up on the IV.
Haha, I hated the book too! Like, OK, I get that it's a 'magical' experience, but finger painting to get in touch with birth? Really? I had to skip 70% of the book to get to the parts that didn't assume I was so emotionally delicate that a feather could fracture my 'inner self'. So stupid, I'm a woman, not a 4 year old.
As far as the nurses "not allowing" you to do things, screw that noise. You tell them what you will allow them to do. It's your body, they don't have any more authority over it than you. Just educate yourself on procedures during birth, and decide ahead of time what you will allow. For example, if you don't want internal monitoring (requires you to stay stationary and has a chance of membrane rupture) tell them you are not going to allow it. Or if birthing on your back is painful as hell, don't do it. That position is just about their convenience anyway. Screw their convenience, you're the one giving birth.
Just don't be an asshole about it, stay polite, and be firm. Your body, your say.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.