Leaving LO with babysitters and/or family — The Bump
September 2014 Moms

Leaving LO with babysitters and/or family

I was just curious how many of you have left your LO with a babysitter and/or family at this point. Also, have any of you allowed your LO to be away from you over night? DH and I are very lucky to have both of our families close by and they are very supportive. They regularly ask to have DS on their own for a few hours so we have been allowing them to do so. My mom has also had DS over night one night as DH and I had been up with him for almost 24 hours and we were exhausted and just needed a break, DS was 5 weeks old at this point. I feel kind of bad for allowing DS to spend the night away from me so early on but I had nothing left to give that day and neither did DH.

Re: Leaving LO with babysitters and/or family

  • I left her with DH once to make a quick trip to the grocery store. We had a wedding at a camp. DH and DS were in the wedding. My MIL stayed with DD while I went to the wedding and reception. I had to come back every 2 hours to feed her and she was only about 50 feet away from me in another cabin though. Don't feel bad about leaving your lo with family though. It is makes you feel guilty then don't do it but if you need the break, take it.

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  • We've had several dinner dates without dd. my parents and his mom watched her. It made me more comfortable having each of them spend several hours with her before so they are comfortable with each other. I think it's healthy to get some time away and aloe time together - you're very lucky to have great help so close!

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    Second BFP 9.12.13, EDD 5.29.14, heartbeat of 114 at 6w1d, mmc discovered on 10-18-13, D&C on 10/23/13 (baby girl/Trisomy 10) 

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  • edited November 2014
    I haven't yet. I've made a few trips to the grocery store by myself while he stayed home with DH, but I don't count that. Dads don't "babysit". It drives me crazy when people say that.
    I keep blowing off invites to things because I'm not ready for other people to watch him yet. He's not exactly a walk in the park and I don't want to put that on others until he's easier to handle. Plus I'm just not comfortable with it yet. It scares me.
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  • We have left DS with my mom and with my MIL. The longest was last Saturday when my mom was with him from 9-4. He has never been gone overnight. He just turned 8 weeks old and we started leaving him probably around 6 weeks. My MIL is going to be watching him when I go back to work in December so I am going to start leaving him with her more often so it's an easier transition for him. He just spent about 4 hours today with her.

    Don't feel bad, if you know your LO is well taken care of. We all need a break every now and then. And grandmas love their time with their grand baby. So it's a win win.
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  • I have left LO with DH a couple of times when I had to get some errands done or mandatory appointments. We have left him with MIL for three hours one time only because she was begging to watch him on her own. We weren't gone as long as she wanted us to be. But oh well.

    I wouldn't feel bad about leaving LO. I honestly am concerned that me and DH haven't had time to go out without him for a date but then again I don't know who I woud trust to watch LO. But I think at some point I will get over that.
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  • My parents are watching both of the kids tomorrow & DH is taking me on a bday date. :) this will be the first time I've been away for more than an hour or so. No overnights yet. I didn't leave DS overnight till he was a year old. I went on a 5 day cruise & it was amazing!
  • I had to leave DS with my sister for a good chunk of a day when I had my gallbladder surgery. And then with DH when I went back to work every other weekend. Luckily DS is a way easy baby and I've have less anxiety leaving him with family ... A friend or acquaintance I am crazy hesitant about.
  • We haven't left DD2 with anyone yet. My FI's parents are very supportive, and they usually ask to take DD1 for a night every other weekend. They haven't offered to watch DD2 though. I don't know if it's because we didn't have them babysit DD1 until she was older or because they're scared of watching a toddler and newborn at the same time!  :))
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  • Left her with my parents for a quick trip shopping, maybe 1 hour when she was 2 weeks.

    Just last week my MIL watched her for 5 hours while Dh and I had a dinner and a movie date, she was 5 weeks.

    Overnight is totally different and won't happen for months yet.
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  • We have left him with the in laws a couple times (for dinner dates) and with my MIL several times so I could run errands. She is great at distracting him rather than just immediately giving a bottle if he's fussy so I can nurse when I get home. We also left him with my brother in law once so we could go to the gym. I'm leaving him with my mom next Saturday while we go to a black tie event - I'm gonna have to pump like four bottles which blows. My husband took him to pick up dinner and I'm currently alone in the house for the first time in forever...amazing. I don't usually leave him for more than a couple hrs just cuz I don't want to have to pump extra!
  • I was away from LO for over 48 hours when I had to be hospitalized with postpartum pre-e complications. DH spent one night alone with her, then she stayed at his parents the second night.  Since she was 3 weeks old every Saturday night my in-laws have taken her every Saturday night so DH and I can be a grown up married couple.  We love it. We don't regret it at all. She'll NEVER remember we let her go so early, and I think that time is important for DH and I to connect and talk without baby around. We nurse before we drop her off and I also leave the milk that I pumped during the previous Saturday night with them, then we nurse as soon as we pick her up.  We love the breather and her grandparents and young auntie (7 years old) love to have her. Other than that though, the only other person who has been alone with her is my 18 year old SIL who is amazing with her. I have NO regrets about time without her so far.. it's good for all of us.
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  • We left her for 12 hours with SIL and FIL, but I don't think I could part with her overnight. Especially since she still wakes up twice a night.

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  • We left her at 5 weeks for a few hours with my MIL so we could go to dinner for our anniversary. Now my parents are going to watch her tomorrow night so we can go on a dinner date. I couldn't be away from her overnight. I was completely lost without her when we left her last time and it only ended up being for two hours.
  • We have left her with my grandma when she was 5 weeks so we could go out to dinner. Tomorrow night is the big one! We are going to a wedding and my mom will be watching her! I am so nervous to leave for such a long time!!
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  • I left LO with my mom and MIL to go to an NFL game with DH (we have season tickets). Other than that, no. My mom will be watching him, so we are going to have a trial run soon. And I'm in my bff's wedding, so she'll be watching him then too. Not overnight yet.
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  • We don't have a lot of family but both kids have stayed with DHs parents maybe 3 times. Once was for bible study and the other two were when DH visited me in the hospital when I got readmitted after a blood pressure issue and then they watched the kids the day I got discharged.
  • I can't leave her with anyone yet. But I wish I could. I have post partum depression really bad. And every freaking thing just stresses me out so fucking bad. I get the worst anxiety over freaking nothing! I swear!! Gah. I did this with DD1 and she didnt spend the night away from me until I had LO! I never went to appts without her. It was insane. She's not going to be a happier baby because of it, and it just made me crazy!!
    The only time I left her was to go to work. I could only leave her with my mom, but it just makes me feel safe for her to be there. In an environment I trust.
  • I've left him every weekend so far with my parents for a few hours. It's energizing to get out bymyself for a while. I get cabin fever pretty easily and it wears me down. I don't leave him for more than 3-4 hours I definitely am not ready to leave him overnight tho. Not until he's a little older and less fragile.

    TTC since 2.11
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  • I'm so jealous! I might feel guilty the next day but I wish I had a family member I trusted willing to take DS for just one night! My mom lives in an in law arrangement so there is no " away" and I'd have to be on my death bed before I allowed my moron ILs to care for my babies. Hell not even then, I'd ask a friend.
    Lilypie - (JLjB)

  • We've left her 3-4 times with my parents to go grocery shopping starting at week 2. We're talking about leaving her with them for a dinner and movie soon work up for when I leave her with them for work in 5 weeks.

    I don't know when I'll be ready to leave her over night. Maybe 1 years old...
    Eliza Mae - September 16th, 2014
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  • 7 and 1/2 weeks! That was our first date post LOs birth. We were gone for 3 hours (dinner and a movie). My family lives out of State but luckily my MIL lives close by. She's great with kids and is a great grandma to all her grandkids; I completely trust her. It helps that she's an experienced RN and has the magic touch with our LO (who is a little fussy when she's not in my arms). This week, I plan on visiting my daycare for a half day with LO to introduce her to the new sounds and smell of the place. Then, 2-4 weeks before I return to work, I will be leaving her at daycare for 1 day a week to establish a routine (mainly a pumping routine since I primarily BF on demand). I am thankful to have 12 weeks of leave and a supportive boss who is okay with me using 2 weeks vacation before returning to the office. Oy! Not looking forward to yet another major adjustment but I'll manage. I know that 12 weeks leave isn't common so I'm very grateful!
  • We are leaving our DS this Saturday for a couple hours just to go to dinner for our 2 year anniversary. DHs grandma and aunt will come to our house and watch him. He will be 5 weeks old on Sunday! Wonder if we'll have anything other than our son to talk about at dinner haha :-) all I know is this mama is getting a big BEER
  • We left DS with my mom overnight on our anniversary when he was 5 weeks. It was difficult but it was also nice to get a little break. My aunt started watching him last week; she'll be babysitting for me 1 or 2 days a week now so I can work. I'm a photographer, so the rest of my job can be done from home, which is nice. Other than that, he's been left with either my mom or MIL a few times for a couple hours so DH and I could do some shopping, run errands, or go out for dinner. It's nothing to feel guilty about; new parents could all stand to take a breather every once in awhile!  
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