The all encompassing sleep question

MelanieCSU

My DS will be 8 weeks old on Monday and while it's great that he is starting to be up more he seems to have a really difficult time falling asleep for a nap. It seems like he and I battle for him to nap all morning/ early afternoon. Is anyone else having this same problem. If so what is helping you get your LO to sleep? I have tried laying down with DS, rocking him to sleep, walking him, taking him for a car ride, and taking him for a walk. Today after trying all of those I just let him cry in his crib for about 15 minutes and he finally fell asleep. Now I need a nap.

Also, I am trying to transition DS from his bassinet, which he is starting to get to big for, into his crib in his bedroom. I'm not sure how to go about doing this without being up all night running between rooms. Anyone already make this transition or any STM's have advise on this?

I am very thankful that DS is starting to sleep a little better at night. However, his sleep is all over the place he will sleep anywhere from 2-5 hours and there does not seem to be any pattern to it. Anyone else experiencing this or anyway to get DS into a better sleep patter?

redtoes13

Letting him cry himself to sleep is not a bad idea. I did it with DD1. She is a great sleeper! I have to recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" as an amazing sleep book.

biokitty42

I don't usually weigh in on these because DD1 is a crap sleeper, but this needs to be said.  8 weeks is way, way, way too young for CIO.  An 8 week old has unpredictable sleep patterns, and they need your help to get to sleep and soothe themselves.  They are not capable of self-calming.  It is hard, and crappy, and it feels like life sucks, but right now, you need to be doing whatever your baby needs to get to sleep.  CIO isn't okay until at least 5-6 months, and that's the absolute earliest that even CIO experts and advocates recommend.

My LO also needs a lot of help to fall asleep, especially in the evening and early night.  Sometimes she's awake from 7 until 11 p.m., and nothing seems to help.  It sucks, but that's the way it is.  Time will take care of it.  In the meantime, swaddling really helps a lot of babies, as does loud white noise.  I would give those a try and see if they help.

doglover31

My LO is 8 weeks old and has days he fights naps. I can tell he's tired too he just won't sleep. I just rock and comfort him, and try laying him down in different places. I'll try his swing, bouncer, rock and play, crib, etc. He will either fall asleep or I just have to deal with a cranky baby.

He also has sporadic sleep patterns at night. Some nights he will do several long stretches, but the last 2 nights it was every 2 hours. They are just so young at this point to really have a set schedule. But boy do I hope he is doing longer stretches by the time I go back to work in a month!

redtoes13

I meant to add this, but got distracted. I meant cry it out with a nap if they are super tired. I did this with my LO only once so far and she slept in five minutes. I agree that they are too young for this at this point, but thought I would try it the other day. Sleep training is months away at this house. Good luck!

pshaortao

My 8wk's sleep schedule is all over the place too. Sometimes she is ready to start the day after 8 hours, other times she will sleep more. I think we just have to suck it up. I was bad at catching her sleepy cues until more recently so that has helped.

rlyttle

Usually the swing puts DD to sleep when nothing else works. CIO is not a god sleep training method at 8 weeks, but don't feel bad for letting him cry. Sometimes you have to do that to stay sane! We just put DD in her crib one night and she hasn't skipped a beat. I don't really have any tips for transitioning.

Everyusernameistaken

I second the swing, swaddle, and white noise to help with sleep and transitioning to the crib. The carrier is another option -- I call my Ergo "the magic sleep machine"!

Also, Troublesome Tots is an AWESOME sleep website/ FB group...it really helped me with LO #1.

kleigh926

I'm one of those horrible parents who lets her baby cry sometimes. DS has cried for 15 minutes before. He is rarely happy when awake unless he's being held and I simply can't spend all my time trying to get him to calm down. I have a toddler and myself to take care of too. I usually will take breaks from whatever I'm doing to attempt to get him to stop crying and go to sleep (like giving a paci or changing his position) but it often doesn't work and he just has to cry for a bit. Babies cry. Sometimes they are going to cry no matter what you do, and it sounds like the OP tried a lot of different things to help him. Sometimes we also have to take a break from holding the baby or trying different things because if we don't it will drive us insane. 

I'm not recommending CIO sleep training. I am saying that chastising someone for letting a baby cry for a few minutes after you've tried several other things is ridiculous IMO. 

HorseLover11

I think its fine if a mom is ok with CIO or not - we all have our own system and as long as our children are happy and healthy that's all that matters. Some think you can't start a schedule for months while others start sooner - different strokes for different folks and we all need to respect each other's methods and share our successes in whatever method were using as we all have the same goals

biokitty42

For the record, I'm not anti-CIO.  I've used it with DD1.  But CIO is not an appropriate method for babies this age.  It's just not.

I'm also not saying that you can't put your kid down and take a mental health break if you have to.  Everyone has been there.  Sometimes you need a little time away from the screaming.  I have two kids now, and DD2 often cries for ten or fifteen minutes while I try to get everyone ready to leave the house -- but that is with me talking to her, giving the paci, and patting her when I can.  Leaving an 8 week old to cry themselves to sleep is not appropriate.  End of discussion.

conradraging

kleigh926 said:

I'm one of those horrible parents who lets her baby cry sometimes. DS has cried for 15 minutes before. He is rarely happy when awake unless he's being held and I simply can't spend all my time trying to get him to calm down. I have a toddler and myself to take care of too. I usually will take breaks from whatever I'm doing to attempt to get him to stop crying and go to sleep (like giving a paci or changing his position) but it often doesn't work and he just has to cry for a bit. Babies cry. Sometimes they are going to cry no matter what you do, and it sounds like the OP tried a lot of different things to help him. Sometimes we also have to take a break from holding the baby or trying different things because if we don't it will drive us insane. 

I'm not recommending CIO sleep training. I am saying that chastising someone for letting a baby cry for a few minutes after you've tried several other things is ridiculous IMO. 

There was no "chastising", just solid advice and she is correct in saying that 8 weeks is considered by experts to be way too young for CIO. No one was rude or "ridiculous", and when someone asks for advice and gets it, I don't get the WKing...

Anyway, OP, you don't sound like CIO is what you intend to keep doing, so no criticism from me. Usually when DD is inconsolable, I swaddle her, give her a pacifier, and put her in the swing. I always check the diaper and offer the bottle first, even if she just ate or was changed because sometimes she just needs a little more food or another change. But usually the swing as fast as it goes, in combination with the swaddle and paci works. If not I would try the carrier.

kleigh926

It didn't even sound like the OP was using CIO or wanted to use CIO as a regular method, just that she had tried lots of other things and didn't know what else to do. So coming in and saying "It is way, way too early for CIO and you need to be doing everything you can to stop your baby from crying" seemed unnecessary. I know that when I try a few things and nothing is working, I need a break for awhile and that means my baby cries.

Leaving an 8 week old to cry himself to sleep for 45 minutes is not appropriate. 15 minutes when you've already tried 5 other things? That's more understandable to me.

emmylu30

I'm not going to touch on the CIO debate but I try to never let LO stay up for more than 2 hours at a time. I've found that the longer he's up, the longer it takes to get him down for a nap. I look for his tired cues and get him down ASAP which is normally an hour or hour and a half after he wakes up. Typically swaddle, paci, and swing or glider do the trick.

Edit to add that as far as transition to crib I started out with naps and then when getting the hang of that add in the first stretch of night then all night. We used the magic Merlin sleep suit as a swaddle transition which coincided with crib transition and DS1 did really well with that so will do again with this LO around 9 or 10 weeks.

jht14

My DD tends to fight naps more than when we put her down for the night. She is also getting too big for her bassinet. I'm not ready to put her in her own room yet so we are moving her crib into our room this weekend.

We use the swing, binky, white noise (she loves the hair dryer on the sound sleepr app), swaddling, anything and everything. I have also has to put her in her crib when nothing else works. But I've also found that sometimes she doesn't want to be held and she's asleep within 5 minutes of laying her down. The more discouraged I get with her the more she screams and fights sleep.

nilvero

I don't think saying CIO isn't acceptable was aimed at OP but PPs who suggested it was okay outside the realm of needing a moment for yourself.

OP, I've started paying attention to his sleep cues, and as soon as I see one, he gets swaddled and given a paci. It seems to help. We will hold him and rock him or just put him in the swing at the highest speed with the noise. A tight swaddle and long lasting white noise has been the key to helping my LO sleep longer. 

Also, we started putting LO in his crib for his first stretch of the night. He will get a bath and/or massage, lullaby, a feeding and then rocked for a little bit. I put him in his crib with his white noise and then I leave. After his MOTN feeding, I was bringing him back with us, but lately he just stays in there. 

conradraging

Love when people try to dictate the kind of responses that are allowed or "necessary" on a post asking for advice. Nobody was even rude, get over it.

ashaw512

If DS is crying for 15 minutes it usually means he's hungry or still hungry if he just got done eating. And maybe he just might need a paci? I'm not saying feed your baby every time your baby cries, I don't believe babies cry for no reason. There's always a reason. Maybe gas? Just wanting to be held? Maybe just wanting to look at you?

I started DDs transition to crib from bassinet by letting her take naps in there during the day and I also let her play in her crib in the evenings just so she would be comfortable in her crib. It worked for her, hopefully it works for DS in a few weeks too.

kleigh926

conradraging said:

Love when people try to dictate the kind of responses that are allowed or "necessary" on a post asking for advice. Nobody was even rude, get over it.

And you're apparently trying to dictate my response as well. I'm allowed to post what I feel is rude or unnecessary just like you're allowed to tell me to "get over it." I felt that she was a little pushy on the CIO thing when it seemed apparent to me that the OP was not suggesting that she wanted to use it as a sleep training method. I'm not really sure what is wrong with me expressing that.

conradraging

Oh you can feel free to express that. Just as I can feel free to express that your response was stupid.

ashaw512

conradraging said:

Oh you can feel free to express that. Just as I can feel free to express that your response was stupid.

It just hormones remember. That's the only reason for all of our emotions that makes think and talk crazy.

str13

@MelanieCSU Sometimes my LO is losing her shit and I just put her down in her boppy and she settles right down and just stares at me! Lol I just have to try millions of things. Sometimes I try skin to skin even though she's 8 weeks! Or I'll go outside with her for a minute, the change in scenery is enough sometimes. Or sitting in the bath.
But don't hesitant to call your pedi, LO may have something going on that's causing them discomfort. I did this with my girl and she actually did have stuff going on! Not just grow spurt or gas. She's so much happier now.

lmk1566

My LO is 6 weeks now & I've noticed that nap/bed time takes a while too. Just a few days ago I was able to get him down in the pnp & bassinet. I also swaddle & use the paci. I've come to the conclusion that I need to set aside about 45-1 hour of sweet talks & paci rectifying before he sleeps. Haven't made the crib transition but I'll be curious on how it goes for yo

Ahlome08

I've noticed that, after feedng DS, if I lay him on my chest upright, for about 20-30 mins swaddled, he will go to sleep easier and stay asleep longer. I guess gravity helps his little digestive system, and he doesn't wake up from spit up or gassy.