Possible miscarriage?

taylorb03 · October 2014

Hey guys. I recently got a positive preganancy test and was so happy. We've been trying to conceive and I had all of the symptoms. Missed period (lmp- 9/22/14), breasts tender and painful, and nausea. I called an obstrician who ordered quanitative blood work, which came back inconclusive.

An appointment was made for another blood test, but in the mean time I've had negative urine tests. Within the last two days I've had cramping and bleeding with clots. I called the doctor who stated that my inconclusive test was at positive level of 11, but believes I'm miscarrying and is waiting for the second blood work results.

How does one deal with this? It would have been my first preganancy and I can't stop crying. My other have is very supportive and let's me cry on him while he cries. He wants to try again right away, but I can't stand to deal with this again. I feel rediculous sometimes because we never got an ultrasound (too early), but I don't know. Any advice? Thanks in advance.

Yours truly.

Trampslikeus · October 2014

Going from positive to negative tests in that quick span of time usually indicates a chemical pregnancy or early miscarriage. I'm very, very sorry for your loss. The TTCAL and loss boards here on the bump are wonderful supportive places for women going through this who have a lot of experience and advice. Be kind and gentle to yourself as you go through the mourning and healing process.

ac5008 · October 2014

Don't feel ridiculous. I am of the firm belief that you fall in love the second you see that extra line. When you lose a pregnancy, you lose a bit of yourself, and the dreams that we all have the second we know we are pregnant.

The good news is that you, very likely, will go on to have healthy pregnancies. Many women have chemical pregnancies or early miscarriages and never have another problem. That does not take the pain away of what you lost, but I hope it gives you a small bit of hope for the future. The miscarriage / loss boards and TTCAL are wonderful sources of support and information for women who have been through the worst like you.

I am so incredibly sorry for your loss - and it IS a loss, don't let anyone tell you different. Please take care of yourself, and take the time you need to grieve. I hope you have much success in your future and that your rainbow is right around the corner.

taylorb03 · October 2014

Thank you both for your kind words.

blastocarrier30 · October 2014

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I hope you and your SO can be great supports for each other. Take care of yourself as you mourn and heal.

suzysurparis · October 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. The prior posters covered all the advice very well, but I wish you luck going forward.

BillyHorrible · November 2014

ac5008 said:
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss - and it IS a loss, don't let anyone tell you different.

This. I am sorry for your loss. It doesn't really matter if you are 4 weeks or 14 weeks, its a loss of a baby and everything that comes along with it. Your hopes, dreams, and plans. Take care of yourself.

kimmarie1105 · November 2014

Everything that others have said. Most women suffer a loss at some point in their life. This is a great resource for comfort and knowing you are not alone. You will get through this. It sounds like you have a wonderful support system at home. Take care of each other.

acethebase · November 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss! Losing a baby at any stage is heartbreaking! I'm just going to give you some advice... Let yourself feel how you want to feel, don't bury your feeling because they have a way of coming back out. Be kind to yourself and let yourself grieve however necessary. If you have fb a group that really helped me was "Miscarriage and Pregnancy loss." Also I saw a counselor and talking about it seemed to help. Talk to love ones and people that are there for you. Again I am so sorry!!

RedRaiderLaura · November 2014

I lost my first at estimated 4 weeks and second at 8 wks and have since had 2 live births, another miscarriage, and this pregnancy we're in limbo. It does to me sound like you have miscarried but do wait for your results and if you don't hear anything call and call again. There is no normal way to handle loss. It's hard. It's good that your SO is supportive, but as it was not his body he probably doesn't feel as deeply as you do. Communication is key. If you have miscarried and do not have a D and C, you need to wait at least 2 or 3 periods to try again anyway (gives a better chance for the next to survive). That should give you time to begin healing emotionally and think about if you are ready to try again. My first dr told me around 90% of first pregnancies end in miscarriage and many are so early moms don't even know they were pregnant. My current dr told me 75% miscarriage once. You're definitely not alone.

erbear84 · November 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss - I agree with others, it definitely is a loss. Take care of yourself.

opheliacantswim · November 2014

I'm so very sorry for your loss. There's nothing ridiculous about the way you're feeling. Please take care of yourself.

housewifebecomesher · November 2014

Very very sorry to hear this. The best advice I have is to allow yourself to grieve. You will know when you are ready to try again (and be sure to ok it with your doctor). I had a miscarriage in January 2013 at 8 weeks and went on to have a healthy pregnancy three months later. Unfortunately, this is pretty common and as PPs mentioned, you are very likely to go on to have a healthy pregnancy. The loss board was a fantastic help to me when we went through the m/c. Take care of yourself, pamper yourself, and just make sure if you are feeling out of control to talk to someone. The hormone change can be very hard on your emotions which are already running very high. Hugs to you.

beckynsean11 · November 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. It does sound like a chemical pregnancy, but I hope that it's not. Loss is so hard. It's really important for you & YH to be on the same page when it comes to getting back to trying. If you're not ready, there's no harm in waiting until you are. You'll know when it's right. Hugs!

txngrl31 · November 2014

I'm sorry you are going through this. *hugs*

kayladawn91 · November 2014

I am so sorry you are going through this. My T&P are with you!

BookishMomma · November 2014

I agree with others that it sounds like you've had, or are still having, an early miscarriage. Since my son was born in July 2011, I've had 3 miscarriages and am now pregnant again and terrified of another loss. You are not alone in what you are going through. Please take care of yourself.