s/o: If your church doesn't have a nursery...

HasteTheDay

What is the reason? Doesn't the leadership get complaints about it??

cristiana

They have a very limited nursery service. I do not know why. No clue about complaints either. I've never complained.

AZ_Erica

Our church doesn't have a nursery because chuch is held in a school. they are in the process of building the church and i'm pretty sure there will be one.  I don't think the leadership gets complaints.  It's a very young congregation with LOTS of tots. 

kevschickee2

I have never been to a church with one and the one I go to I havenever seen anyone complain

joseysbride

It's a really small, and pretty rural church.  There aren't a ton of kids.  It doesn't bother me at all, and I doubt anyone else has complained.  We go to church pretty much every Sunday, and have since before dd was born.  Of course, there have been the occassional Sundays where she can't sit still, but overall she is really well behaved, and I just attribute it to the fact that she is used to it.

eclaires

The reason?  It's a 150+ year old church.  There isn't exactly anywhere to put a nursery or cry room.  The church is large, but it's very old fashioned (and gorgeous).  There's simply nowhere it would go.

I highly doubt the church gets complaints.  I've been going there since I was 7, and honestly, I wouldn't send my kids to a nursery even if there was one.  A cry room on the other hand, I would take advantage of.  I think most people who attend our church feel the way I do.  I've actually never been to a Catholic church with a nursery - just cry rooms.  Most other parents I know in our church feel the same way I do about nurseries - it's the way we were raised.

cristiana

eclaires:

The reason?  It's a 150+ year old church.  There isn't exactly anywhere to put a nursery or cry room.  The church is large, but it's very old fashioned (and gorgeous).  There's simply nowhere it would go.

I highly doubt the church gets complaints.  I've been going there since I was 7, and honestly, I wouldn't send my kids to a nursery even if there was one.  A cry room on the other hand, I would take advantage of.  I think most people who attend our church feel the way I do.  I've actually never been to a Catholic church with a nursery - just cry rooms.  Most other parents I know in our church feel the same way I do about nurseries - it's the way we were raised.

 

Totally agree. 

butterbeansmama

my church has a cry room/nursery, a toddler room (2-3), a preschool room (3.4) and then they start Sunday school.

If all your churches don't have nurseries, do they at least have Sunday School at a certain age? What about activities outside of church for the kids? Anything?

 

 

cristiana

DD started attending Sunday school at age 3. It is before Mass, not during. There are always activities planned and available for kids and families, just outside of actual church time.

KoriBrett

I'm not churchy but my guess is -

Some churches are too old and have no room.  Some are too small, also have no room to add on/have people watch the kids, tight budgets, etc. 

Every Catholic church I've been to has had a cry room, no nursery.  I'm thinking that the general idea is that the kids stay with their families, as it is a family type gathering, and if people wanted to go to church without their kids they'd leave them at daycare/babysitter - not depend on free church provided childcare. 

Or maybe I'm cranky.  But there ya go. lol

Desert*Flower

We have a cry room, but the church stresses that it is only for young babies.  Once baby is calm, they want you to return.  One of the Deacons recently said that the children are part of the community too

Kersbear

We have a cry room and Sunday school classes as well, but we don't use either.  Carter comes to mass with us though and that's how we prefer it.  We don't go to the cry room either, we sit in the church.  We'd like him to be there for mass and learn how to behave during mass.  We were raised the same, attending mass with our parents, and would like to do the same with Carter.  There are always a lot of other kids in church during mass, no matter which one we go to.

REOM

eclaires:

 

 honestly, I wouldn't send my kids to a nursery even if there was one.  A cry room on the other hand, I would take advantage of.  I think most people who attend our church feel the way I do.  I've actually never been to a Catholic church with a nursery - just cry rooms.  Most other parents I know in our church feel the same way I do about nurseries - it's the way we were raised.

Ditto eclaires.

Who staffs these nurseries? Are they trained? Same people every week?

No way, I wouldn't do it. Our church has a childrens mass starting in PreK, where the children go into the chapel during the gospel.

eclaires

butterbeansmama:

my church has a cry room/nursery, a toddler room (2-3), a preschool room (3.4) and then they start Sunday school.

If all your churches don't have nurseries, do they at least have Sunday School at a certain age? What about activities outside of church for the kids? Anything?

 

 

Of course they do - at least activities.  CCD classes as well.  And I think one mass has a Sunday School type thing.  I wouldn't send my kid to Sunday school either, though.  As far as I'm concerned, my children can sit in mass for an hour each week and learn to deal with it.  On top of that, they can do activities at the church and CCD classes.  

I just don't understand not making them sit through mass - it's how I was raised.  I also went to Catholic schools and did plenty of church activities.  Jackson is fairly good in church already and he will only learn to get better.  Of course, he'll have days where he is off, but the majority of the time, he will be expected to sit quietly in mass for an hour each week.  I'm not worried about him learning about church at his level - I think he will get something from mass and he'll do other church activities outside of mass to help him learn about our faith.

It's not about the church not being accommodating of children - at least at my church.  There is plenty for kids to do, but IMO (and I think many others in our church), they need to learn to sit through mass.  Not go play in the nursery.

kylara111

My church has no nursery and I can't say I've ever seen a church with one.  Parents are strongly encouraged to bring their children to mass so there is no need for a nursery.  If they start to cry, parents take them out to the vestibule. 

KellyMichelle

REOM:

eclaires:

 

 honestly, I wouldn't send my kids to a nursery even if there was one.  A cry room on the other hand, I would take advantage of.  I think most people who attend our church feel the way I do.  I've actually never been to a Catholic church with a nursery - just cry rooms.  Most other parents I know in our church feel the same way I do about nurseries - it's the way we were raised.

Ditto eclaires.

Who staffs these nurseries? Are they trained? Same people every week?

No way, I wouldn't do it. Our church has a childrens mass starting in PreK, where the children go into the chapel during the gospel.

I work in my church nursery.  We have one paid worker for each room.  We also have one volunteer per room. We are in the same room every week and are the only ones that are allowed to do diaper changes and assist with bathroom needs.  We are all trained in CPR and first aid and many of us have childcare backgrounds.  We teach bible lessons, do crafts and sing songs.  It is very structured and fun for the kids.

getnmarried910

REOM:

eclaires:

 

 honestly, I wouldn't send my kids to a nursery even if there was one.  A cry room on the other hand, I would take advantage of.  I think most people who attend our church feel the way I do.  I've actually never been to a Catholic church with a nursery - just cry rooms.  Most other parents I know in our church feel the same way I do about nurseries - it's the way we were raised.

Ditto eclaires.

Who staffs these nurseries? Are they trained? Same people every week?

No way, I wouldn't do it. Our church has a childrens mass starting in PreK, where the children go into the chapel during the gospel.

Our church has nursery and it's fully staffed.  We have one director who is over the entire thing.  She has one person in each room who is ALWAYS there.  The others rotate.  There are usually 2 other adults, then a couple of teens in each room.  Every person has to go through an application process and background check.  No men are allowed in the room alone with kids or allowed to change kids per our churches insurance policy (unless it's their own child).  Parents also rotate in.  DH and I serve 1 weekend every month, or every other depending on the need.  The director just writes us in where we're needed.

We like having the nursery program because it allows us to go to sunday school and the service without being distracted.  We are also involved in the orchestra and choir and having a nursery allows us to stay involved.  Because I am a SAHM, I also think it's good for our kids to be in the care of others, playing with other kids, and learning from other adults.

HasteTheDay

REOM:

Ditto eclaires.

Who staffs these nurseries? Are they trained? Same people every week?

No way, I wouldn't do it. Our church has a childrens mass starting in PreK, where the children go into the chapel during the gospel.

?

There are volunteers from the church. Anyone can apply to be on the list. The length of the list varies from time to time, but typically a couple will serve every 6 weeks. The are background checked and interviewed. The Children's Ministry Coordinator oversees during services. She takes her job very seriously. We have three services throughout the week, so if someone volunteers in one service they can go to another.

I think it's sad that you wouldn't trust other people in your church to care for your child for an an hour or so!??

HasteTheDay

KoriBrett:

I'm not churchy but my guess is -

Some churches are too old and have no room.? Some are too small, also have no room to add on/have people watch the kids, tight budgets, etc.?

Every Catholic church I've been to has had a cry room, no nursery.? I'm thinking that the general idea is that the kids stay with their families, as it is a family type gathering, and if people wanted to go to church without their kids they'd leave them at daycare/babysitter - not depend on free church provided childcare.?

Or maybe I'm cranky.? But there ya go. lol

Is depending on free church provided daycare a bad thing??

I guess it all just depends on how you were raised. At my church, they are really into "age appropriate teaching" as well as serving each other. So the parents get an in-depth, challenging Bible study, the kids get crafts, games and fun songs that help them learn, and babies get rocked and cuddled so their parents can get the most out of the adult study. It's about learning and growing in faith, not "sitting through". To us, anyway.?

Angela814

I'm Catholic, and I've never seen a Catholic church with a nursery.  I assume it's because they want kids to be part of the service from the start.  No one has ever complained that I've heard.

KoriBrett

Well, the way I see it, all for one/one for all.  If I went at all, the kids would be sitting with us whenever possible.  If there are special activity days or something, sure, but otherwise I really see no reason (other than hissy fits or diapers) why they would need to be elsewhere. 

eclaires

HasteTheDay:

KoriBrett:

I'm not churchy but my guess is -

Some churches are too old and have no room.  Some are too small, also have no room to add on/have people watch the kids, tight budgets, etc. 

Every Catholic church I've been to has had a cry room, no nursery.  I'm thinking that the general idea is that the kids stay with their families, as it is a family type gathering, and if people wanted to go to church without their kids they'd leave them at daycare/babysitter - not depend on free church provided childcare. 

Or maybe I'm cranky.  But there ya go. lol

Is depending on free church provided daycare a bad thing? 

I guess it all just depends on how you were raised. At my church, they are really into "age appropriate teaching" as well as serving each other. So the parents get an in-depth, challenging Bible study, the kids get crafts, games and fun songs that help them learn, and babies get rocked and cuddled so their parents can get the most out of the adult study. It's about learning and growing in faith, not "sitting through". To us, anyway. 

Well, that's well and good - and I think I addressed in my post my thoughts on age appropriate learning and learning about our faith.  Jackson will get that, but he will also learn to behave in mass and go each week.  It's an hour, he can deal, and I think that he will get something out of church at his level as he grows.  Right now, he loves the music.  As he gets older, maybe he'll learn to listen to the gospel and homily or maybe he'll like the first and second readings.

Going to mass each week is learning about our faith, and is a very important part of our faith and I think there is nothing wrong with expecting a child to behave and eventually participate in the actual mass.  He will get age appropriate lessons outside of mass - but he will still be expected to go to mass, as that is part of our faith. 

It's not just about sitting through w/ no outside learning and us expecting him to be seen and not heard.  It's about the fact that mass is a part of our faith and he will go, behave and participate.  That is my expectation of him, and so far, so good.  I do not think playing in the nursery, no matter the craft or the knowledge of the teacher, teaches him that mass is important and that he has to behave.  That's a lesson in itself that is necessary IMO.