Military Families

A Question. Also, sort of an intro, but mainly a question.

CytheCythe member
2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
edited October 2014 in Military Families
Hello ladies, a few of you may already know me I am Cythe, an active poster over on TTGP. MH is Navy and we've been actively TTC #1 for 5 months now. He just came home today and told me that his next scheduled deployment is most likely getting moved up from Spring 2016 to Fall 2015. I'm fairly sure we're not pregnant this month (he was underway during most of my FW) so, if we conceive next month we'd be looking at July 2015.

My question is this, for any moms with experience or any of you wonderful ladies who have delivered while your husbands have been deployed, would you choose to continue TTC if you knew your husbands wouldn't have been there for the birth?

I've dug through some of the threads on this board, and have seen quite a few great responses about finding help and how to plan for going in to labor/giving birth alone. I have no family in the area, but I do have some wonderful friends who would help. I'm just curious with the whole process and coming home without YH, if you would chose to do it again.

Thanks, ladies!

Edit for words.
TTC #1 since May 2014
3 failed IUI cycles
Oct '15 - IVF 1 - 10R, 3M, 0F
Sept '16 - IVF - 12R, 11M, 5F and 3 perfect day 5 blasts - MMC 7w5d
Jan '17 - FET 1 - BFP, EDD 10/14

Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

Re: A Question. Also, sort of an intro, but mainly a question.

  • NSLNSL member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    My husband was midway through a 12-month deployment when our second son was born, so take all of this with that in mind.

    IMO, giving birth without your spouse there isn't ideal, but it's not something that will have a long-term impact on your family.  The hard part comes after the baby is born when you're parenting alone, and then when your husband comes home and has to adjust to life as a father as well as a husband.  It's hard, it's emotionally draining, and it absolutely does impact the bonding experience between both parents and their new child.

    If we had known that H was going to be deploying we definitely would not have been TTC-ing.  As it was, I found out I was pregnant on Monday and he got his orders on Wednesday.  Surprise!  We made it work because that's what you do when you're faced with undesirable but unavoidable situations, but I would never recommend that anyone purposely plan a pregnancy with a deployment looming.
    Cythe
  • I wouldn't have done it intentionally for a first child.  It almost happened anyway, but we got lucky.  For a future child, maybe.  Depends on some stuff.
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    Cythe
  •     
  • Thank you ladies for your honest answers. As a hopeful FTM, I don't even have real experience bringing home a baby, much less L&D or parenting.

    I appreciate the insights from each of you.
    TTC #1 since May 2014
    3 failed IUI cycles
    Oct '15 - IVF 1 - 10R, 3M, 0F
    Sept '16 - IVF - 12R, 11M, 5F and 3 perfect day 5 blasts - MMC 7w5d
    Jan '17 - FET 1 - BFP, EDD 10/14

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker
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