Hi Everyone!
My husband and I have decided to start TTC our first child this November (so excited)!! We have been married for 4 years now so we are constantly asked when we are going to start our family. Some family members know we are planning to start trying this fall but we have not told them any specifics.
My question for all of you is: They are already asking me "Did you get your IUD out yet"? almost weekly. I just keep saying not yet as my husband and I decided we would keep it to ourselves when we do get pregnant for at least 8 - 10 weeks (ill probably tell my mom sooner but that's it). I don't want "Did you get your IUD out yet"? to turn into "Are you guys pregnant yet?" and I am not good at fibbing, never mind fibbing on the spot, how do I answer these pesky relatives without making them feel like I am blowing them off? Or making them suspicious and asking more questions? Its specifically my sister in law and mother in law bugging me....
Thanks in advance!
Heather
Re: Intro and a question
Personally, I think it's weird for someone to ask you if you've had your IUD out. I would just say no, not yet. And then maybe ask them if they'd like to do it for you, lol. Maybe they'll stop asking then.
ETA: or you could use my real life story, which is that my OB coudn't get the IUD out. It had migrated from my cervix area to somewhere else in my ute. It took 2 visits (spaced almost 6 weeks apart ) and help via a ultrasound to finally get it out.
Marriage: 12.18.04
DD1: 5.19.10
DD2: 4.11.12
I have to agree with PPs. I know I am guilty of asking people personal questions like that. However, I limit it to people I am actually close to. For instance, I can have those conversations with my best friend and I currently have those conversations with my SIL, but they are almost always the instigators of the conversations.
Also in agreement with PP I think you should just tell them you aren't comfortable having this conversation with them. Personally, if I do not want to have the conversation with a certain person I just give a general "no more kids" (not true) or "we'll see"
Personally when that happens to me i joke around about it. I get asked when the 2nd baby is coming. And I answer them "as soon as DD turns 18 so i dont feel lonely" lol and other jokes too.
I think it's sort of weird that your family members know your prefered method of birth control, frankly.
That aside, unfortunately, since you have decided to tell them your TTC timeline, the questions seem only natural. Other than saying "when there is something to tell, you will be amongst the first to know" I am not sure I have much advice.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
Thanks all. DH and I have always been very open and honest with our families because we are close with them. It has always been normal for us girls to sit around and talk birth control preferences/experiences or future family plans. DH and I talked recently and decided that this was something we wanted to have to ourselves. So again, your right I am dealing with the consequences of that openness. I'm so used to sharing everything that I'm just not sure how to deal with getting a little privacy and having people respect it!
Mostly I have been avoiding my SIL and only talking with her via text. We have always been very close and I know she doesn't understand why I've been so absent lately. Looks like I'm going to come right out and tell her to back off.
I am loving the "we'll see" and "when there's something to tell you'll be amongst the first to know" so thank you for that.
Heather
First off your family knows you have an IUD? my family and I are close but my birthcontrol is not something we regularly discuss...