January 2015 Moms

Grandmother-in-law rant

gingerygirlgingerygirl member
edited July 2014 in January 2015 Moms
My husbands grandmother is a mean lady. She hates me. Like legit HATES me. After her daughter (my mother-in-law) passed away last march, she hated me even more...if that's possible. She blamed me for her daughters death. (My mother-in-law was an amazing wonderful woman who had been battling scoleraderma for the past 10 years...yeah, science and medicine is all my fault.) She has insulted me, threatened to physically hurt me, and even yelled for a solid twenty minutes at me in a public place. She has disowned my husband and I. I don't mind, I never really liked her either. Good riddance.
Fast forward to yesterday: she called me! What? Weird. She found out from a relative that I'm pregnant. (I purposefully never told her. She's never going to meet my child and hubby agrees.) After calling me a filthy whore for getting pregnant so young (I'm 21 and married...that makes me a whore?) she asked which hospital I am giving birth at so that she can be there in Karen's (MIL) name. Seriously? She really thought I was going to tell her that? Even if my mother-in-law was still alive, I wasn't going to have her in the room with me. Just my mom and hubby. It blew my mind that she thought I was going to give her the details about my baby! She wanted to know the sex, the due date, everything! When I refused to give her any information she said "Well if you're not going to tell me anything then you better start praying that social services doesn't take that poor child away from you when I'm done talking to them!" Uh, excuse me? What the hell! Where does she get off with that?!
She's done wrong by us so many times that I can't even write it all down.
Sorry this is so long, just UGH! Some people! This lady is legit crazy and I never want her around my family!
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Re: Grandmother-in-law rant

  • Wtf!? Total nutcase! Scary
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  • Wow I'm sorry you're having to go through this. At least you have your husbands support.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Wow. That sure is scary. I'm glad you and YH are on the same page.
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  • When did she have her first kid? How do her dates line up? Maybe you could let her know what a whore she is by basing it on her childbearing years?

    What's hilariously ironic is that she was 18 and unmarried when she had her first kid, and then a few years later had two other kids by two different men. I really don't understand this woman.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • If someone threatened that they will have a part in having my children taken away from me, I would get a restraining order, contact some authorities, do whatever I could to make that crazy stay away from my family.

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  • You need to make your husband deal with her. He needs to call her and stand up for you as his wife. It's his family therefore his problem. 


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  • gingerygirlgingerygirl member
    edited July 2014

    It sounds like she has dementia. Her behavior is very unbalanced.

    She's only 59...I think it's more that she's grieving in a very bad wrong way. (I know dementia can happen at that age but it seems unlikely)

    @TXUltraRunner‌ he has dealt with her, multiple times. Up until yesterday, we hadn't heard from her in months.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Start recording phone calls also. Unfortunately my husband's brother got married to this thing(too much background to describe the crazy) that would randomly call his mom and have a 30 minute conversation with her. Followed by him calling and saying he is getting a restraining order for how his mom keeps harassing and stalking them. It was overly ridiculous, but his mom got a lawyer involved on her end to protect herself, recorded conversations and documented missed calls, voice mails and even if accidentally seeing them in the grocery store or in public keeping those receipts. After a year of this and an actual court hearing she was the one granted a restraining order against the daughter-in-law. Save everything and document it, it will only benefit you in the long run.
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  • Start recording phone calls also. Unfortunately my husband's brother got married to this thing(too much background to describe the crazy) that would randomly call his mom and have a 30 minute conversation with her. Followed by him calling and saying he is getting a restraining order for how his mom keeps harassing and stalking them. It was overly ridiculous, but his mom got a lawyer involved on her end to protect herself, recorded conversations and documented missed calls, voice mails and even if accidentally seeing them in the grocery store or in public keeping those receipts. After a year of this and an actual court hearing she was the one granted a restraining order against the daughter-in-law. Save everything and document it, it will only benefit you in the long run.
    Please do not record conversations unless (a) the other party knows about it (pick up the phone and announce "this phone call is being recorded" or (b) you are positive that it is legal in your area.  In some states, it is illegal (a crime) to record a conversation without the other person's knowledge.  In some states, only one person needs to know about the recording.
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  • Wow, she sounds like a piece of work.  I'm very glad that your husband is on the same page as you.  I like the idea of changing your phone number or perhaps blocking hers.
    BFP #1 09/26/2013 EDD 06/04/2013 MMC 11/01/2013
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  • WTH! If I was you I would go ahead and start a journal with dates on her interactions with you. Just for later on down the road should you need it. I wouldn't want to think that you would have to use it should she do something crazy like false accusations but you never know. She sounds unstable! I would also make it known to the hospital when you get there, if you can that she is not allowed in your room. I hate to say it but she may find out the hospital through other means. 

    I am always a person that likes to be prepared...so its just a suggestion. 

    Good Luck and hope she seriously all bark and not bite. 
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  • pray67pray67 member
    I am sorry you are going through this, but this is just crazy! You should'nt have to deal with this especially when you are pregnant. I would also let the hospital know of her so that she is not allowed inside. Does she know where you live? I am wondering if there was anyway you could stop her from coming near you once you are back home with the baby. I would be scared to have such a person around me or my baby. I dont know what you could do legally to not have her around you.
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  • pray67pray67 member
    I am sorry you are going through this, but this is just crazy! You should'nt have to deal with this especially when you are pregnant. I would also let the hospital know of her so that she is not allowed inside. Does she know where you live? I am wondering if there was anyway you could stop her from coming near you once you are back home with the baby. I would be scared to have such a person around me or my baby. I dont know what you could do legally to not have her around you.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Forgive Her For Her Angry Heart And Move Forward With Your Wonderful Life. Your Husband Should Take Responsibility For Talking To Her And You Need To Share How She Treats You With Other Members Of The Family. If They Hear How You Are Being Treated They Will Most Likely Keep Things To Themselves. Plus Hospitals Have Security In Maternity Wards So No Wrist Band No Mean GIL.
  • CanukMamCanukMam member
    edited July 2014
    Advice: Record those fucking calls. JUST in case social services DOES land on your door.

    Also, family court is different then regular court. That recording just might save your ass. Maybe you can call one of those lawyer help lines to get a little advice. Or hit up the reddit legal advice forum.
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  • She sounds mentally ill. Perhaps someone in the family from whom she is not estranged should assist her in seeking treatment.
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  • Fuuuuuuuuuuck her.
  • 95139513 member
    peggels24 said:



    Start recording phone calls also. Unfortunately my husband's brother got married to this thing(too much background to describe the crazy) that would randomly call his mom and have a 30 minute conversation with her. Followed by him calling and saying he is getting a restraining order for how his mom keeps harassing and stalking them. It was overly ridiculous, but his mom got a lawyer involved on her end to protect herself, recorded conversations and documented missed calls, voice mails and even if accidentally seeing them in the grocery store or in public keeping those receipts. After a year of this and an actual court hearing she was the one granted a restraining order against the daughter-in-law. Save everything and document it, it will only benefit you in the long run.

    Please do not record conversations unless (a) the other party knows about it (pick up the phone and announce "this phone call is being recorded" or (b) you are positive that it is legal in your area.  In some states, it is illegal (a crime) to record a conversation without the other person's knowledge.  In some states, only one person needs to know about the recording.

    This! In NH, recording someone without their knowledge is considered illegal wire tapping.
  • efujanefujan member
    Wow!!!  Sorry you have to deal with this.

    As others have said - document document document!  Get something on record to help support your side should child services become involved.  And avoid saying or doing anything to add fuel to her fire.  It sounds like you've been doing that, and that's got to be insanely tough to do in this situation!!!  Just keep taking the high road & not letting her find ways to build some sort of whacked out case to social services.  If you give her nothing, they will likely ignore her.

    Then, move on.  Do what you can to find forgiveness for her so you can get some peace in your heart.  You've got a sweet little baby on the way & don't need that stress in your life!!!  GL!!
    Myles was so pumped about the baby . . . until he figured out he'd have to share all his toys!!!
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  • 95139513 member

    Here is a list: clicky

    Twelve states currently require that all parties consent to the recording: CA, CT, FL, HI, IL, MD, MA, MT, NV, NH, PA, WA. (There are a few caveats listed in the article)

    All other states, and DC, are one party states, meaning only you have to know it is happening.

    This being said, at least in NH, if you make it clear that you are recording them and they continue to talk, it is considered acceptance.

  • This might sound over the top, but seriously, protective order. She is harassing you and you don't need this kind of stress.
    BabyFetus Ticker
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