Take aways from Tardy for the Party

wildflower75

I guess this could be considered early FFFC...I am watching Tardy for the Party and just a few thoughts that I think would make for good conversation...
1) There are a lot more women that are scared of C-sections/surgery than I thought... They told her one of her twins was breech and she still went through with vaginal birth. That's great and more power to you. She was especially confident since it was her 5th time giving birth but I personally would have opted for the CS given all the risk factors. Maybe this is because I had an emergency CS (after failure to progress) and my recovery wasn't that bad. What say you?

2) She made everyone wear medical masks (camera crew etc) for allegedly the first 90 days. How many people would you let around your newborn in the first month? I plan on keeping LO at home for 40 days (cultural practice) with limited visitors. Are you the take the newborn out the first week type of mom or the ask your family to get the Dtap type of mom?

3) Lastly does anyone on this board have 6 kids or plan to?

morrkim

1.  I think if I can I would like to have a vaginal birth even if baby B is breech.  I have heard that sometimes baby B will rotate after baby A is delivered. I won't know until I am actually in the situation.

2.  I don't plan on being very strict on exposure.  I took DD out when she was only a few days old.  I mentioned the dtap to our families, but did not say they had to get it.  I did make sure DH and I both got it though.

3.   No way.  I wanted 4 kids, but now that I am expecting 2 and 3 I am freaking out about having that many kids, especially the financial side.

carcrashheart

I took DS out of the house as soon as I felt comfortable doing so. I didn't make anyone get vacc's bc we lived OOT so nobody was going to see him frequently besides us (and we did get them). DS didn't get sick until he was nearly a year old. And since then has only had annoying colds. He had a fever on and off for a few days but Tylenol brought it down in 20 min each time so none of us were totally miserable. I'm not a germaphobe or particularly cautious.

No to six kids. We are done at two. I'm too infertile and DH is too old to be dealing with more pregnancies. It takes me at least one year to get pregnant, so DH would be well in to his 40's if we had to have six kids.

lizgrace03

1. I am FTM and not having twins so no major insight here, but I would say that I'm comfortable with the idea of a C Section if I need it. My mom had one with all 3 of us.

2. I hate being cooped up in the house. I am hoping to take him out sometime in the first week maybe? We'll see how it goes.

3. Two kids max. Maybe one and done.

absolutelymaybe

1. I welcome a CS with these babies. In fact, unless dealing with the most ideal situation for a vaginal birth, I would prefer it. No double whammies. Nope.

2. I haven't decided yet. I definitely am not making people wear masks around them, but I don't see us taking them out for a while just because of weather.

3. Hell to the no. Even before knowing we would be dealing with infertility, DH and I wanted one or two, max. Just happened we ended up at our higher end in one go. We have a third and final frozen embryo sitting that we are going to have to decide what to do with. We are probably going to donate it.

kkewhitney

@morrkim‌ I have twin sisters and that's exactly what happened when they were born! My mom's height is exactly 4'11.75" and no one believes me when I tell them she delivered the twins vaginally. The first came out perfectly and then the second was breech. The Dr. was ready with forceps and to intervene but my dad asked "Can we give her a minute?" Twinner turned and delivered herself 20 min later. Yay
As to the questions,
1. I would definitely still try vaginally if baby was breech. Baby's breathing is monitored the whole time, when I asked my midwife about breech she was really confident that it can be complication free.
2. I'll keep exposure to closest friends and family probably for the first 3-4 weeks when we'll have the shower. Everyone else is out of town anyway.
3. We'll see how #1 goes but honestly if you had the room and moolah I'd have. 6. We love children and I come from a family of 4 kids.

mamatohne

1. I fought my doctor really hard against a c/s with my son. I ended up having one. When I held my perfect (huge) baby in my arms I had an overwhelming amount of guilt. He was here and he was perfect and healthy andthat is all that mattered at that point. If it is recommended to me, I will absolutely have a c/s if it means any amount of risk to the baby.

2. I have had whooping cough. It was terrible! I cannot imagine a little guy/girl getting it. I absolutely will make sure anyone who is around him dsily will have a dtap. As far as taking her out in public, I did with my son, But he was born in late April . More than likely we won't be going out with this lo unless completely necessary with ad cold as it will be for us.

3. We want 3 max. 6 is alot!

PineApple85

1. I would like to try for a vaginal birth even if the baby were breech - twins or single. There are a lot of benefits to vaginal birth for the baby - even a trial labor has benefits. I don't want a CS but I'm not opposed if it's in the best interest of my child.
2. I wouldn't make people wear masks - lol! - and I do plan to take DS2 out in the first couple weeks but I'll either wear him or he'll be in the carseat carrier with a canopy to keep strangers away (mostly because it'll be cold season). I mentioned tDap - or whatever it is - to family but I'm not going to restrict contact if they don't get it.
3. Idk about 6, we're thinking 3, maybe 4, right now. 6 seems like a lot. Even if money wasn't a big issue.

wildflower75

I forgot to answer number 3 for myself...
If I had started having children younger I would probably have 3 or 4.
But alas I will be 40 next year so unless I win the lotto we are done with this baby#2.

mb314

1. I would want to avoid a c-section, and I'm a proponent of med-free births where it is safe for mommy and baby, but if my baby was breech or I had other complications requiring a c-section, I would want what is best.  I think there are few OBs/MWs who will attempt to deliver a breech baby. 

2. We took DS out within the first week.  We went out to eat.  I wore him in a Moby, and kept him close and out of contact with others.  No big deal.  I didn't make people get vaccinated.  I might ask my mom this time around because she works in a school and is around a lot of germs.  She may be up to date on her shots anyway.  DH just got a tetanus booster, which also vaccinates for whooping cough, thanks to getting a fishing hook in his finger. 

3.  Six?  no thanks.  We're stopping at 2. 

PineApple85

mb314 said:

1. I would want to avoid a c-section, and I'm a proponent of med-free births where it is safe for mommy and baby, but if my baby was breech or I had other complications requiring a c-section, I would want what is best.  I think there are few OBs/MWs who will attempt to deliver a breech baby. 

This.  There isn't a "baby catcher" OB or MW or otherwise around me that would do breech.  It's automatic CS.

mrsransom

1. I would never risk a vaginal birth with a breech baby.  I don't know of a doctor who would be willing to do that, either.  Like a PP said, it's an automatic c-section at my practice & hospital.  NOT worth the risk!!!  I do understand being afraid of a c-section if you have never had surgery before, but I wouldn't let that fear override any risks that may be associated with a vaginal delivery.

2. We took DS out at 2 weeks.  We went out to eat to see DH's work friends & let them see the baby.  We went out pretty regularly after that.  I have the D-TAP vaccine, DH will get it soon, & we will both get the flu vaccine.  I will encourage close family to do so as well.  I will also have visitors use hand sanitizer for the first couple weeks before they hold her.  That's about as far as I go though.  Other than that, I am pretty relaxed!  Her first outing will probably be to family Thanksgiving at close to 2 weeks old

3.  NO WAY.  We could not afford 6 children.  I don't know many who could!  I also feel that they wouldn't get enough individual attention & time with me....& I think that many would drive me insane anyway.  We plan on stopping at 2, but don't feel quite ready to make any permanent decisions.  We definitely wouldn't have more than 3 though.

thedjinn88

I'm not scared of a c-section but I would look into both to make a decision.

I took my daughter out within the first few days, I'm sure we will do the same. Not asking for people to get vaccinations.

I would be up for 6 if we can afford it, but with his daughter, my daughter, and now son on his way, we are only half way haha

kfo22

1. If baby were breech at 40 weeks, I think I would have to go have a c section... my midwife doesn't deliver breech babies, I don't think. It would probably be a pain in the ass to get care at the hospital, though, being military.

2. I'm not sure.. it will be pretty cold, but I will want to take her out after a few weeks. I'll be nervous, I'm sure. No masks... My husband and his family believe a little germs make you stronger :P

3. DH wants FOUR BOYS. And we're having a girl this time. At this point, we can't afford that many kids. But, neither could my grandparents, and they had 6. We won't be using birth control for religious reasons (UO I'm sure). We shall see!!

wildflower75

kfo22 Just out of curiosity since you mentioned it... Does not using BC include not using the rhythm method?

kfo22

@wildflower75 Nope we could use that! Don't have any confidence in it though... my cycles were always extremely long and unpredictable.

meeshybee

I would be absolutely petrified to have any kind of surgery, including a C-section. That being said, I trust my OB and if she says it's less risky than I vaginal birth I would do it.

I took DS out when he was 5 days old, but that was also not during cold/flu season. I'll probably take LO out as soon as I feel comfortable going out myself. I don't plan to ask people to get shots, especially since Dh, the kids and I will be the only ones in daily contact and then if she goes to daycare they're all required to have them. Masks are just ridiculous. Another bonus of the car seat canopy, it discourages strangers from touching baby.