Intro and Question (Warning Living Child Ticker)

lcwed

I am 36 and am having my first miscarriage.  When I went in for my first appt and dating u/s at 8 weeks, I was only measuring 6 weeks.  I am meeting with my doctor tomorrow to discuss options and am leaning toward a D&C because we are leaving for vacation next week and I am still having pregnancy symptoms but no mc symptoms.  The only caveat is that we have a super high deductible that we have not met so we would be paying our deductible of $2500.  I haven't called our insurance company for specifics because I can't verbally talk about this without breaking down.  My question is, given the cost, is the D&C worth it, or should we wait it out?  Not sure what to expect so any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.

mrsjg2013

I'm very sorry for your loss.  Your experience sounds similar to my first loss... growth stopped at 6 weeks, discovered at 8 1/2 weeks.  It's a very personal decision as to which method to choose... how are you feeling emotionally about waiting/miscarrying naturally versus the d&c which would be a more immediate method?  In my situation (everyone is different, of course), I did not begin miscarrying until 3 weeks after discovery of the MMC, so at about 11 1/2 weeks along.  Sorry if it's TMI, but there's a decent amount of blood and I had a decent amount of discomfort with the natural miscarriage, ended up going to the ER and was admitted because I kept passing out due to the blood loss.  Some women never have extremely heavy bleeding like I did all at once, they just have heavy period-like bleeding for an extended period of time.  Honestly, if I could've done it again that way for my most recent miscarriage (3rd one, baby stopped growing at 11 weeks), I would have.  I had to have a d&c- I would prefer to let my body handle things naturally  than to introduce a foreign object into my body.  (personal choice)  I will tell you that the recovery after the d&c was tough for me.  I passed very large clots for over a week afterward- each one causing pain as my cervix struggled to pass it.  If I kept up on my double dose of pain meds (Tylenol with codeine and Ibuprofen 600), it was tolerable.  Please know that some women don't experience this at all.  I'm so sorry that both options seem problematic with vacation plans   I would ask the doctor to take your HCG levels and ask his/her opinion about how soon the miscarriage may start before deciding for sure. 

KingLED

I'm so sorry for your loss.

As for the options, have you considered cytotec? That would give you the getting it over with part without the massive bill. Though you might still have some bleeding on your trip no matter what option you choose. 

ETA: And the symptoms might take their time going away. I've had pregnancy symptoms for up to a month or more after a D&C. It all just depends how fast your body does its thing.

KingLED

Yeah, don't let scare stories sway your decision. I've had several D&Cs and never had a single issue. They were all pretty painless and quick healing/minimal bleeding after.

My most recent loss I passed naturally (twins, one passed 3 weeks before the other) and it was just heavy period discomfort for about 5 weeks or so.

Every person is different in what they experience. There are a lot of personal stories in the advice and experience thread if you are interested in reading them.

Good luck.

lcwed

Thanks guys.  I will ask her what my HCG levels were and about the pill.  I'll also ask her what the D&C involves so I will know what happens and what she thinks is best.  I've known since Monday that it was probably a mmc and still having the pregnancy symptoms has been awful, so waiting it out is not appealing to me right now.  I don't mind bleeding/spotting during vacation.  Thanks for the great advice and sharing your experiences.

meredithcarole

@lcwed‌ I am so sorry for your loss. We have a high deductible plan and I know the sticker shock that comes along with a D&C. That being said, I don't regret mine from the stand point that it gave me a little closure. I am sure whichever way you go will be fine.

lcwed

@Gastro‌ I am so sorry you are here too. I remember you cleared up my wondering about gas used on OBEM. Sorry I missed your goodbye if you posted one. @meredithcarole‌ thanks for sharing I talked to my doctor and we decided to try the pill first and then do a D&C if that didn't work. I took the pill Friday night. I had some cramping and a lot of what I would describe as vagina farts for lack of a better word. I passed some clots, one particularly large but have had very little bleeding and only some brownish spotting. Thanks so much for the support.

stephy1221

I am so sorry for your loss.

I opted for the D&C after things weren't progressing on their own. From a financial standpoint I second guess that decision, from an emotional/physical recover standpoint it was the right move.

It was just too hard for me to walk around pregnant after finding out I would not be having a baby.