"I'm sure it's the breastfeeding"

MiaMyPuggle

Anyone have anyone in your life who isn't a big proponent of breastfeeding, so any ailment the baby has just HAS to be bc of BFing??? I'm getting fed up with hearing from some family members that she has this or that bc of BFing. It's nothing I'm eating! I'm going to continue BFing despite what you say....lay the F off and let me be! Sorry....I'm trying to keep the peace, so I needing a sounding board. Thanks!

CopperT0p

My MIL was like this for DS1.  She thought he was a slender baby because of BF'ing and said I must be "starving" him.  Now he's a healthy, happy 40lb 3.5 year old. She never comments on it anymore.  We're lucky that we live in an area where BF'ing is encouraged and quite the norm so I don't often come across friends or strangers saying such things. 

peanutmuse

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish.

But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

RingOfFire11

Yes, most of my family. My situation is different though. DD2 is intolerant of SO MANY things I eat. I can't have dairy, soy, eggs, beef, corn, nuts, wheat, and now black beans. They don't think it's worth the trouble but there's no saying she'd be able to tolerate the prescription formulas either (and I don't want to pay for them). If I'm not complaining, why are they?! She's doing so good on BM and now that we've narrowed down the problems, she's so happy too. I just ignore them and move on.

hbrooks88974

peanutmuse said:

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish.

But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

What?! Selfish? How?

peanutmuse

hbrooks88974 said:

peanutmuse said:

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish.

But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

What?! Selfish? How?

It's selfish because my MIL is crazy. And a bitch.

Mostly it has to do with how she views her daughter as a mother. MIL considers SIL a super mom. (She does fine, but super mom is a stretch.) She had her son 7 weeks after mine was born. And quit BFing at 2 months. But I plan to BF until he self-weans or my supply tanks. Anything I do is bad or selfish in MIL's mind. No specific reason, other than because it's me doing it.

tahloulah10

For the most part, I've been lucky that family, coworkers, and even strangers have been supportive. I have one co-worker, though, who wanted to BF her daughter and her milk never came in. When I talk about an issue with sleep or BFing, she automatically tells me to use rice cereal because Stella must be hungry.

MiaMyPuggle

peanutmuse said:

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish. But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

What?! Selfish? How?

It's selfish because my MIL is crazy. And a bitch. Mostly it has to do with how she views her daughter as a mother. MIL considers SIL a super mom. (She does fine, but super mom is a stretch.) She had her son 7 weeks after mine was born. And quit BFing at 2 months. But I plan to BF until he self-weans or my supply tanks. Anything I do is bad or selfish in MIL's mind. No specific reason, other than because it's me doing it.

I bet it's bc she wants to feed him and she's jealous she can't. 

peanutmuse

MiaMyPuggle said:

peanutmuse said:

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish. But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

What?! Selfish? How?

It's selfish because my MIL is crazy. And a bitch. Mostly it has to do with how she views her daughter as a mother. MIL considers SIL a super mom. (She does fine, but super mom is a stretch.) She had her son 7 weeks after mine was born. And quit BFing at 2 months. But I plan to BF until he self-weans or my supply tanks. Anything I do is bad or selfish in MIL's mind. No specific reason, other than because it's me doing it.

I bet it's bc she wants to feed him and she's jealous she can't. 

@MiaMyPuggle - false, haha. I bring bottles of pumped milk every single time we go there, which is at least every Sunday. She has given him bottles two times. Two.times. She declines every time. I worked 4-6 days a week until 2 weeks ago. So he has been doing bottles for 1/3 of the day since he was 6 weeks old. I definitely do not monopolize his time and she knows it.

She also told my husband on Saturday that he does too much to help me. Sorry lady, but you can't have it both ways. You can't say that BFing is selfish, but that my husband shouldn't be responsible for the baby (including feeding him.... bottles).

wifetomrb101

@kellydew09 - I'm so glad I'm not the only one! My SIL's are all about BF'ing...and I am too, when it works.  None of them have had a baby with dairy sensitivities.  I just got DD2 onto the bottle.  She can (thankfully) handle Nestle GoodStart - the plain stuff, without the added Omegas and stuff because it's 100% whey based, and there's no modified milk ingredients, casien or skim milk powder.  It's the only cheaper formula that works.  That being said, she has a sensitivity, not an intolerance.

ETA: what do you use?

NenaMarie84

My parents have never come out and said things directly but they hint they wish I would do formula. They'll say things like it would be easier to just give her formula or that I should give her cereal because she's not getting enough from just BM. It's annoying but overtime I've gotten used to it and let it slide because it isn't worth arguing over.

MiaMyPuggle

peanutmuse said:

MiaMyPuggle said:

peanutmuse said:

I posted about my MIL a few weeks ago. She told me and my husband that breastfeeding was selfish. But my MIL is a bitch. So there's that.

What?! Selfish? How?

It's selfish because my MIL is crazy. And a bitch. Mostly it has to do with how she views her daughter as a mother. MIL considers SIL a super mom. (She does fine, but super mom is a stretch.) She had her son 7 weeks after mine was born. And quit BFing at 2 months. But I plan to BF until he self-weans or my supply tanks. Anything I do is bad or selfish in MIL's mind. No specific reason, other than because it's me doing it.

I bet it's bc she wants to feed him and she's jealous she can't. 

@MiaMyPuggle - false, haha. I bring bottles of pumped milk every single time we go there, which is at least every Sunday. She has given him bottles two times. Two.times. She declines every time. I worked 4-6 days a week until 2 weeks ago. So he has been doing bottles for 1/3 of the day since he was 6 weeks old. I definitely do not monopolize his time and she knows it.

She also told my husband on Saturday that he does too much to help me. Sorry lady, but you can't have it both ways. You can't say that BFing is selfish, but that my husband shouldn't be responsible for the baby (including feeding him.... bottles).

Well, she's a hooch. She seems like one that argues for the sake of arguing to get under one's skin. That's how it sounds, anyway. Must be exhausting. 

wifetomrb101

kellydew09 said:

@wifetomrb101‌, I self diagnosed us and put him on Alimentum and his spitting up has significantly decreased. He also had a rash on his chest and back that is all but gone (because he's not scratching it all the time). We have his 6 month appt tomorrow, so I'll ask them to confirm if he has sensitivity, an allergy, it intolerance.

@kellydew09 - I hope it's 'just' a sensitivity rather then an allergy or intolerance!  Good luck tomorrow!

llars924

Sorta.  My daughter had started to reject BFing at certain points a few weeks ago and would only take a bottle (either pumped or formula, she isn't fussy).  When I told my mom and sister, they were both like "oh, so you are going to be done BFing then?  what a relief!"  Conversely, my MIL and SIL were both like "oh, how sad."  My sister wasn't able to breastfeed due to some issues, and so she and my mom think it is much easier to formula feed.  My SIL breastfed until almost 1 with both of her girls.  So, it's two opposite opinions.  She is now back to wanting to nurse whenever she can.  I was just at my mom's house for a few days, and she was sorta pushing the formula bottles and was a little annoyed when I was taking time to pump and then use the milk I pumped.  My husband doesn't get it either, he thinks I have it so easy with her because all I have to do is "whip a boob out" and she will fall asleep.  I just keep setting little goals for myself, to make it as far as I can and try not to listen to anyone else.  My little girl is so sweet and happy, I must be doing something right!

RedSaffron

Yes. I'm fighting a bf battle with SO's whole f*cking family including him. Everyone in his family starts with bfing until two-four weeks in and they completely switch over to formula. SO has been pushing me to give DD formula so I can go back to work, but I told him I can pump when I do. He doesn't think I will pump enough for DD so he wants to have a back-up plan. I understand the back-up plan, but I'm not okay with completely switching. His cousins side-eye me when they find out I'm still bfing DD at 5 months (I'm not flaunting, they ask). What the fuq is wrong with people?? Everyone is telling me that its gonna be tough when DD has teeth, blah, blah. Stop trying to discourage me.

Babychuu

Actually, I haven't had too many negative comments about breastfeeding, but I'm living in Germany and its way more accepted here. The only comments I really get are from my Grandma in America, and she isn't really pushy, just curious as to why I "bother" with breastfeeding when he is already so old (he'snot even 5 months yet). 

angmarkoe

I'm actually surprised you get negative comments for breastfeeding! It's pushed on me and I'm made to feel terrible because I DON'T breastfeed.  I had every intention of, I really do think it's healthiest and best for baby.  But my kid is a pig and I was never able to keep up with his needs no matter how hard I tried and eventually got frustrated and a mess because of it all.  I'm over all that now but have now opened myself to getting told constantly by family, friends and co-workers that any time there's something up with my LO it's because I DON'T breastfeed.

MiaMyPuggle

angmarkoe said:

I'm actually surprised you get negative comments for breastfeeding! It's pushed on me and I'm made to feel terrible because I DON'T breastfeed.  I had every intention of, I really do think it's healthiest and best for baby.  But my kid is a pig and I was never able to keep up with his needs no matter how hard I tried and eventually got frustrated and a mess because of it all.  I'm over all that now but have now opened myself to getting told constantly by family, friends and co-workers that any time there's something up with my LO it's because I DON'T breastfeed.

DD had a dairy sensitivity and milk protein intolerance.....which is finally getting better (not throwing up as much.....so much improvement).....so, if she breaks out on her face or her body, has diarrhea or is cranky one day, they automatically assume it's something I did and they think it would be so much easier to FF and not worry about affecting DD. It's just insanely annoying and it's like I run and hide when I have to feed her bc I know I'll get the, "so, you decided to continue to BF" or "how's the formula working out?  Oh, wait, you're still BFing?!?"  Blow me, family members!

megngregk

The thing that pisses me off about this is that every other mammal in nature is "breast"fed. Hell…where do people thing cows milk comes from?! The animals have to be impregnated so that they will lactate to provide milk for all our dairy drinking humans. Seriously people, figure it out.

But yes, human milk is bad for human babies. Flucking idiots.