Smoking

Drove2u

I used to smoke a pack a day. I'm now 5 weeks, 2 days pregnant and since I found out I have cut it down to three cigarettes a day. I want to stop completely and can't tell friends or family that I'm still smoking. I feel like a loser because I never thought I would still smoke while pregnant. I just need support to stop. It's really the worst.

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Drove2u

Thank you. I've read so much about it where some say what you say while others say you will have a baby with problems. My mom smoked more than three cigarettes each day with her three children and we've never had any problems besides all becoming smokers at some point. I just think how I'm affecting the baby each time I smoke but the withdrawal just gets to be too much sometimes.

cMichelle0423

What WCIBN said. With my first pregnancy i smoked between half a pack to a pack a day and I made myself quit cold turkey the day I found out I was pregnant. Knowing that I had another life depending on me to quit, actually made it pretty easy. (Not saying that it'd be easy for everyone.) Stop being selfish and quit. Having the mentality that it's "too hard is what's keeping you from doing it.

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designchica

You have cut back a lot and that is commendable.  I know how hard it is to give it up.  I quit smoking cold turkey 86 days ago (though I did have to do the nicotine gum for a couple of weeks)

As far as withdrawl, I did the nicorette gum cut in half twice a day for the first days.  Then the next week I did half  a piece of gum once a day.  By the third week I was only doing it a few times a week and by the fourth week I was off the gum completely.

It isn't easy, but I promise you that it can be done!!  Look how far you have already come.  I know you can do this.  I  am not going to lecture about the dangers to the baby, you already know that.  But what I will say is that YOU CAN DO THIS IF YOU WANT TO!  

I think what others have said about having someone to call is really helpful.  I had someone that I emailed and told that I was quitting smoking.  He was really the only one I announced it to and he was very supportive and I was able to email him when I was craving a cigarette and reach out for support.  It was very helpful.

I also got a calendar at work and with a giant marker I wrote, "1" on the first day I quit smoking.  Every day that I come in to work I look forward to writing another number for each day that I haven't smoked.  I still enjoy it.  Today I got to write, "86".   I cant' wait to write 100!

Little things like that may seem silly but they can be the thing that keeps you from smoking when you are really craving it.

Hang in there and keep pushing forward with this. 

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sandrabrooke

I don't have much advice, but my sister quit smoking and always says the money she saved from it paid for daycare!  

Drove2u

Thanks everyone! @designchica‌ is nicotine gum safer then? I have some but it says it raises blood pressure which isn't good so figured might as well get the real thing if I'm doing damage anyway. But if it's safer than I will try that for sure. I see a doc on June 13. My goal is to tell her I don't smoke by then. :-)

Drove2u

I actually made my own cigarettes with a filter and a machine so a pack only cost me about $1.25. And I used all natural tobacco. I know it's still not good for you but I never smoked the chemical cigarettes.

designchica

I am not sure, but I do think the gum is a little better because you are not getting the smoke. However, the nicotine is still bad for you, so I only used them as a tool to help me wean off the nicotine.

alexandrac86

Quitting smoking has been the only issue I struggled with. Caffeine, no problem,didn't any anyways besides my morning coffee : ) Modifying the foods I ate and all those little things you do when you find out wasn't an issue. Smoking was. It was easy to cut back, but to quit all together was very hard. Smoking was my only vice before. I didn't drink or drown myself in food. I smoked. All you can do is remember your baby. It's not just your health anymore. Talk to your doctor and try like hell to do it on your own. It's harder for some than others. Set goals even if they're small ones! Good luck!

PrimRoseMama

See my response here:
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12356980/guilt-riddled#latest

Ask your doctor about some smoking cessation aids & get into group therapy to help yourself. Try to create new routines. It's tough to quit but keep trying.

coffee89

Aside from asking your doctor, some insurance companies have support programs available as well.

Mimaloo

I quit smoking two years ago because of the e-cig. I bought the Smokefree brand (pricey but worth it). I started out buying the regular nicotine cartridges and each time I bought a new box I went down in the amount of nicotine until I was at 0. Eventually I forgot I even had the thing. 

Good luck to you - I know it's hard. 

Drove2u

@alexandrac86 funny that you say it's easy to cut back, because it is. Completely stopping is so hard. it's physical as well as psychological. I really really want to stop.

@mimaloo I like the ecig idea. I will try that.

caraleeb

You can do this!! i went from a pack to 0. Cold turkey, its been 15 days. Is it hard? YES do i think about it all the time still? yes. is it worth it? YES! Did i cry for 3 days straight, yes. Its so hard but 3 a day is so close to none. Just make the leap. I got rid of mine, all my lighters, and refuse to buy any so i dont have any to even think about. Its been so hard but its so worth it you really dont need those 3 i promise.

Shortstack06

I would definitely consult your doctor, or even call and get preliminary advice before your initial appointment. There are plenty of risks if you smoke through your entire pregnancy but you seem on a great track with cutting back and trying to do what is best for you and baby. 14years ago, a doctor told my aunt one a day won't harm the baby. She had a healthy 8 lb baby. But information and the ability to gain knowledge has changed since then. The best advice, is ask your doctor what is healthy for you.

Drove2u

Thanks everyone. Ugh I'm still at 3 a day but you have all given me motivation to just stop. And so that's it. I'm done. I feel like I will cry for 3 days too without it. Ha! And just be so miserable. But it's only three days out of mine and my baby's entire life. I've been bleeding for a could days too and I almost feel like I'm losing my baby now. I went to the doc yesterday and all they could do was check my cervix which confirmed no miscarriage but why am I still bleeding? They couldn't tell me and don't do ultrasounds until week 8. I did get blood drawn though. Next appt is next Friday. I hope baby sticks.

mmariel

I smoked almost a pack a day until one day even before my missed period, it made me throw up. Getting nauseous right after helped me quit. I still crave one once in awhile but then I remember how sick it made me. I know people that have smoked their entire pregnancy and their babies are fine. It does however increase the risk for issues.

SSCmomma

I quit before I got pregnant but I smoked for 21 years and was also up to 2 packs a day.  It sucks but if I can do it, you can do it!  Just keep trying and if you slip up, just try again.  Good luck!!!!

Drove2u

@Nicb13‌ thanks for asking. So it's been rough. I've been bleeding and cramping. One midwife told me that I'm in the process of miscarrying and another told me that I may just not be as far along as everyone though. This was based on one beta level no trend yet. So when I found all this out I smoked a cigarette but otherwise I haven't been smoking at all. I've just been beyond stressed. This Friday I go for an ultrasound and hope to get some answers.

Drove2u

I will. Thanks so much girls!! :-)

Erze

I quit smoking right after I found out I was pregnant. I even tried to light up, but I couldn't do it. There was this guilt from knowing that I was carrying another life inside me. Good luck, dude. 

KittyMu82

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time OP, good luck with the quitting attempt.

I think stop worrying about what's happened so far and keep your mind focused on not smoking in the present, taking each hour as it comes.

It might help to download a whole bunch of aversive information and pictures etc about what happens to the baby when you smoke (I know that would be stressful and awful to look at - but that's the point) - and then glancing through that information whenever you feel the urge to smoke - and reminding yourself that if you can just keep it together for a week or so it will get much much easier.

Also try to think of the reasons why you smoke. If it's mostly about stress relief, come up with a tool box of activities or things you can do to de-stress instead. Even if some of those are expensive (e.g., a massage) - it's worth spending on those things in the short-term while you get yourself off the cigarettes.

You might also want to enlist family members' help. Other strategies involve not carrying around any cash and giving your credit card account details over to your significant other - so they can check and monitor that you aren't spending money on cigarettes. That will really motivate you to stop as you said yourself, you would hate it if the family found out.

Just have a thing about everything you can do to stop yourself - and seriously I would explain what you are going through to loved ones who care about you so they can support you through this too.

Not telling them is enabling you a little to continue smoking.

Good luck OP.

KittyMu82

Another strategy is to give yourself a big tangible reward every day that you don't smoke. E.g., your husband gives you $100 a day (whatever amount is appropriate in your circumstances). Big enough to be rewarding. I know that improving the health of your baby should be reward itself - but in reality, short-term and tangible rewards (that you can touch and enjoy NOW) will actually be more effective in changing behaviour.

Erze

Well, since I've been called a douche for not being helpful...

Perhaps you can look into buying a vaporizer e-cigarette. You can buy flavoring that has absolutely no nicotine in it and has two ingredients: Vegetable Oil and Flavoring. You can also adjust the level of nicotine, if you buy the oil with nicotine, so that you can gently ween yourself off of the nicotine addiction. That way you are still able to "smoke" and have the habit while not inhaling the toxins that come with cigarettes. I think that was part of the only reason I was able to quit is that I had been cutting down, like you are doing now, before I found out. It's cheaper than buying cigarettes and healthier. Of course, talk to your doctors and make sure that it's healthy before hand. There are a lot of reports that are coming out on the pros and cons of vaporizers.

I am sorry if that came off as callous. That was not my intention. 

Drove2u

hey guys! thank you all for being so encouraging but I just found out that I miscarried. Hopefully see you sometime soon in a future group.

Drove2u

hey guys! it's all good @erze only had good intentions.

Erze

I was just talking with OP in a private message and apologized if I came off as callous or condescending. She said I didn't. Anything else? Or are you going to shut up and respond to the fact that she just miscarried and keep her and her family in your thoughts? You don't think it's callous to continue arguing with me when something was clearly misinterpreted? Grow a heart.

Erze

Okay..

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Drove2u

hey guys! I was in a private message with @ezre and really she is a good, caring person. I think what she said may have come out wrong and I didn't take offense to it at all. She had good intentions in her suggestions and I  hate that everyone is fighting now over my post. In the end, there is no baby and none of this really matters anyway. I hope you all have great, drama-free pregnancies. I'll be thinking of you all!!!

Erze

You don't know me. I stopped trying to defend myself. Think what you want. I don't have the time or energy to stress out about what complete strangers think of me... I certainly don't want this drama in my pregnancy. Good luck to everybody. @Drove2U, once again I am so sorry for your loss and I hope to see you around soon. Enjoy your anniversary tonight. 

KittyMu82

Oh I am so, so sorry to hear that My thoughts are with you.

DrBatlyMD

So sorry for your loss

alexandrac86

I am so sorry for your loss, I've been there myself. Just know for some reason it wasn't mean't to be. It will happen again!