Some of my friends are butt hurt over not opening gifts at the party...

Mrs.Greg

Yeah. I don't even know what to say about it. I told 4 friends that we only have an hour in the party room, we are serving food and cake, we might not have time for presents. All of them were saying their kids would be disappointed, their kids are so excited to see Lydia open their gift, they're sure there will be enough time, blah blah blah. Sheesh! Don't get me wrong, opening gifts at parties is definitely the norm in my circle of friends. But I can't help that our party is right at dinnertime (5:30-7:30) so I thought we should serve food, which could take away time for presents. Now I feel like I need to rush people to eat, then rush cake, just so we can squeeze in presents. Ugh!

Oh! And I've been preparing Lydia for the possibility of not opening presents at her party. She's fine with it, she says she is excited to play with her friends. Why are my ADULT friends being so whiny??

honkytonk_kid

Yeah, it's silly, but on the other hand it IS fun to watch kids open presents. Would she be ok with opening presents while everyone eats their cake? She can eat hers after.

notkateanymore

Are you kidding me? The birthday girl should skip eating her cake because some people are being idiots? Hell no.

notkateanymore

I'll switch places with your "friends" I'd be super happy not to open gifts.

Mrs.Hizzo

I tried to do the "open at home" thing at my oldest's 5th party, and all his friends had a fit. So I cut everything else short and let him open his gifts. At that age, I do think it's a big deal for the friends to see the birthday boy/girl open their gift. Maybe you could squeeze it in?

notkateanymore

Mrs.Hizzo said:

I tried to do the "open at home" thing at my oldest's 5th party, and all his friends had a fit. So I cut everything else short and let him open his gifts. At that age, I do think it's a big deal for the friends to see the birthday boy/girl open their gift. Maybe you could squeeze it in?

Is it the norm in your area? I've never seen a kid throw a fit about it in the 10 years I've been going to birthdays.

Mrs.Greg

The thing is, I know some people will be late showing up. But it's not like our 1 hour starts when everyone gets there. It'll start at 5:30. I know it's not my fault if people show up late but I'll still feel bad if we start cake before everyone has at least started to eat food. Ya know? I did just remember something - I'm making cupcakes so cake will actually go pretty quick, right? So if I can get over the weird guilt about waiting for everyone to eat before we start doing cake, we might be able to squeeze in gifts too. Ugh! I've been so excited for Lydia's party until my friends started stressing me out about their kids being unhappy. Not cool.

notkateanymore

Ignore them. Do what you want and throw the gifts in the trunk and haul them away!

honkytonk_kid

KateMW said:

Are you kidding me? The birthday girl should skip eating her cake because some people are being idiots? Hell no.

Meh... Birthday kid gets the first slice- eat some before, finish it after opening presents. It's cake, not a 4 course meal. This is what I've seen lately, it seems to work fine? I guess that's if the birthday girl wants to open them at the party, if the kids would rather play go for it.

honkytonk_kid

Mrs.Greg said:

The thing is, I know some people will be late showing up. But it's not like our 1 hour starts when everyone gets there. It'll start at 5:30. I know it's not my fault if people show up late but I'll still feel bad if we start cake before everyone has at least started to eat food. Ya know? I did just remember something - I'm making cupcakes so cake will actually go pretty quick, right? So if I can get over the weird guilt about waiting for everyone to eat before we start doing cake, we might be able to squeeze in gifts too. Ugh! I've been so excited for Lydia's party until my friends started stressing me out about their kids being unhappy. Not cool.

Aww don't stress out about it! Some things seem like big deals when you're talking about them or asking opinions (hello every issue on this board) that aren't a big deal at all. Do what you want! I doubt the kids will even notice, and your friends will get over it.

sunnydays99

It's the norm here to open gifts at parties. I've tried skipping it before and always end up doing it anyway. FWIW, the parties I've been to (and hosted) that had 1 hour in a party room have all had plenty of time to eat, have cake & ice cream, open gifts and socialize. As long as food is prepped and set out it's been no problem at all.

olga1311

I personally think opening presents at a party is so needless anyways. Everybody is bored silly sitting through this. I can't imagine kids caring enough or even being able to sit through this. I am glad that in my circle of friends opening presents is the norm only for baby showers.

Andrewsgal

They can tell their little precious snowflakes that this party and gifts are not about them. Do what you want.

Mrs.Hizzo

KateMW said:

Mrs.Hizzo said:

I tried to do the "open at home" thing at my oldest's 5th party, and all his friends had a fit. So I cut everything else short and let him open his gifts. At that age, I do think it's a big deal for the friends to see the birthday boy/girl open their gift. Maybe you could squeeze it in?

Is it the norm in your area? I've never seen a kid throw a fit about it in the 10 years I've been going to birthdays.

I wouldn't say there's a norm. Some people do it, some don't. I think it was just these kids. They all cornered me with a half hour left in the party and asked when DS was opening his presents. I said, I think he'll do it at home guys, I mean would you rather sit and stare at him opening presents or keep playing? And they said, watch him open presents. They were all standing there staring at me and I was starting to feel like I was in a scene from Village of the Damned, so we opened presents.

Mrs.Greg

LalaMama81 said:

Why did this even come up? I wouldn't have mentioned it at all and they're ridiculous for complaining. If the kids actually care, you can make a game day decision.

Well, we all met at the park the other day. One of the mom's asked what food I'd be serving because on the invitations, I wrote "pizza and appetizers will be served". So we talked about food first and then I mentioned we would only get an hour in the party room, we might not have time to open gifts since we're serving food. So I brought it up.

Mrs.Greg

cjcouple said:

oh geez, do we have to go over this again?

there is nothing weird about opening gifts. some kids do enjoy watching the bday kid open them. it takes like 15 min.

on the other side, it's nbd to skip it. when my ds asks why they didn't open presents I say because they ran out of time. he shrugs and says oh. ok. they wont throw a fit.

do whatever you want.

None of my friends said their kids would throw a fit. It was more like "Awwww but Sohpie is so excited about Lydia's gift. She'll be sooooo disappointed if she doesn't see Lydia open it!!" We have never skipped gifts at one of our parties and have only ever been to ONE party where they skipped and it was a school friend's party, not a friend-friend. So all of our kids expect it. But dude, I seriously thought my friends would understand, not get all whiny.

zbeesma86

invite them over for a gift opening party after the birthday party?? if they want to watch them open them so bad. super odd for an adult to be pissy over something like that. I would be giving DH a high five if we were told we didn't have to sit and watch a kid open gifts!

spring_time

How many kids are invited to the party? If it is 5 kids, and 4 want to see it opened, I am sure you can manage.  Most times I have been in a party room, it has kind of devolved after 30 minutes.  The last 15-30 minutes consist of the boys tackling each other, playing ninja warriors, and rolling around on the grubby floor.  A distraction of opening gifts would be a welcome time killer.  Of course, you aren't dealing with rambunctious 4 year old boys, so it might be more calmer atmosphere.

If these are good friends, you could invite whoever wants to come see gifts opened back to your house afterward. Just have pop and an easy snack available.

If it is a mix of friends and family, you could open the friends' gifts and open family gifts at home.

One of my cousin's was short on time and sent us a text message that evening of her DS playing with the gift.  DS thought that was really cool.  You could do that, or just take a pic of your DD with her gift and send it to your friends.

FWIW, I get why people do not like watching kids open gifts. I also understand that there are tons of kids who do not like watching others opening gifts.  It is brutal to watch a 1 year old struggle through a pile gifts. However, I do not think it is at all strange that some kids actually enjoy watching others open the gift he/she picked out. At 5 years old, I find kids to be pretty efficient gift openers.

ETA: If you really don't want to open up gifts at the party, then don't.  Your friends, and their kids, will get over it :-)  I was just giving some other options.

kcisthebombdotcom

I went to a party recently with 20 kids and an hour was plenty of time for food, cake and presents. I think you're overthinking it. If there's enough time at the end, do it. If not no biggie.

magentawarped

KateMW said:

Ignore them. Do what you want and throw the gifts in the trunk and haul them away!

Don't forget to let out an evil cackle as you do.

jf198400

We have been to several parties at party places and there is never time for presents. Some of the kids ask about it, and the adults just say there isn't time. No big deal. I've only ever seen presents opened at parties at home.

notkateanymore

I'm really looking forward to a couple of months from now discussing this AGAIN on my BMB in time for the babies 1st birthdays.

jensriot

We have a couple kids that really do like to see their gift opened by the birthday kid. It's easy to grab that gift and have DD open it in front of them before they go. It's win win for us. They get to see the gift opened, DD gets to say thank you personally and anyone who doesn't want to sit through gift opening can go on with playing. If just a couple people care, can you quickly open their gifts after food?

blushingbride_08

I've actually never been to a kiddie party where they opened presents at the party. My ds is still opening presents and his bday was last month. It can be overwhelming.