January 2014 Moms
Options

What has changed?

A post on FB started my thought process on this topic. We've talked about this before, but it seems like things change on a monthly, weekly, daily basis. Amirite?

Based on your expectations of what you thought you would do/not do, what has changed? It could be in terms of anything -- BF/FF/supplementing, co-sleeping/bed-sharing, WM/SAHM, etc.
«1

Re: What has changed?

  • Options
    *snip* I've decided to just ride the waves as they come and stop trying to have all the answers.
    This is exactly how I feel a lot.
  • Loading the player...
  • Options
    I think I might go back to bed sharing. We both get more sleep.
    You gotta do what you gotta do.
  • Options
    This one being my second I decided to just let things fall as they may...which has saved my sanity this time around.  My biggest "I would never" for my first is he still has his paci.  He will be 2 in August and as much as I would love to say he only has it for naps/car rides...he has it all the time.  I swore I wouldn't be that mom, but I am and honestly I am letting him enjoy it until his birthday.  I hope to have it gone by that time, but we will see.
                                                                              Married 12/17/2011
                                                                                  K born 8/31/12                                 
                                                                                  C born 1/11/14
                                                                  BFP #3 Nov 2014: D&C January 2015
                                                                  BFP #4 Sept 2016: Due May 31 2017


  • Options
    Everything. I'm doing everything differently. She is such a completely different baby than my oldest that I'm still trying to figure things out.

    I've always lead toward AP thinking. But this baby is pushing me past where I used to be. I swore I'd never bed share but it is the ONLY way to get any sleep.

    I wanted to cloth diaper but she is just too thin for the diapers have. I use my Ergo waaaay more than the Moby. I tried purees already instead of waiting until 6 months. I let her cry longer than I did with Emily because Ellie cries immediately after being put down.

    I've been contemplating formula for my own reasons.
    __________________________________________________________________________________________ 

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers  
  • Options
    Im surprised how much I enjoy staying home/having two. I thought it would be super stressful and overwhelming everyday. Some days suck, but it was way worse in my head.
  • Options
    Rojovol34 said:
    I never ever ever thought I would have this hard of a time coming back to work, or would I ever want to SAH, but it's all I can think about now. I'm giving myself a couple of weeks to adjust and see if I change and if not I'm going to have serious chats with DH about going part time until he's in school. I am obsessed with my child and want to be with him all the time. Never saw that coming.

    This exactly. I knew I'd have a hard time but I didn't think it would be this bad. It doesn't help that I absolutely HATE my job. It's not what I ultimately want to do... I don't get paid a lot. So after #2 is born in December I'm quitting. The only thing we'll be losing is awesome health insurance. DH and I are actually sitting down to figure out everything financially/insurance wise tonight.

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    image  

     



     

     

     

  • Options
    Aww shucks @ChuggingWater‌ :\"> I'm always lurking.
    __________________________________________________________________________________________ 

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers  
  • Options
    Aww shucks @ChuggingWater‌ :\"> I'm always lurking.
    How are those beautiful babies?

    Sorry for the postjack, Peanut!
    imageimage
    Baby Chugging born 12.28.13
    induction due to HELLP
     image

  • Options
    I thought I'd switch to formula by now. I thought I'd be as structured about things as I was with DD but I find myself saying, "Oh whatever, or whenever you get around to it" to a lot of things. I also thought I'd baby wear more simply because I have two children. He's been in the Moby twice (two flights) and in the Ergo twice.

  • Options
    @ChuggingWater‌ The bambinas are good. Emily is a sassy one now that she's 3. And she moves into the preschool room on the 9th *sob* She's just too grown! But maybe they will convince her to potty train.

    Ellie is a really content baby, as long as she can see everyone. She abhors being alone and will pitch a fit until someone acknowledges her.

    Sorry @peanutmuse‌!
    __________________________________________________________________________________________ 

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers  
  • Options
    cnctfcnctf member
    I never thought I would bedshare, but we have been for weeks now.
    image=
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Options
    I'm a baby hog. I didn't expect to be so attached to her. If we go to family get togethers I hate to hand her off to others to hold. I can't help but feel like time is flying by and I just want to soak up every second with her. Ridiculous I know. I also didn't think I'd be so strict on trying to get a napping schedule. I always thought babies just slept anywhere and it didn't matter when. If Adalyn misses nap time by 30 mins we are so screwed. There are other things I'm sure that I say I would never do and now I do but can't remember now.
  • Options
    BMReid said:
    Thanks, @MarBee1214‌ :) I know you understand all too well.
    xoxoxo @BMReid Davis is a rockstar
    imageimage
    Baby Chugging born 12.28.13
    induction due to HELLP
     image

  • Options
    bensmommy518bensmommy518 member
    edited May 2014
    Before DS I never thought I would co-sleep (now I know better and recommend at least trying it to my friends having babies).  I also didn't realize how I would lean so much towards the attachment parenting style (baby wearing, EBF on demand, co-sleeping, BLW, homeopathic remedies like amber teething necklaces, etc). 

    This time with DD I thought I would swaddle more than I have.  DS loved swaddling once I learned about it but it has not been the hit with DD I thought it would be and just didn't work for us.

    As an aside, for other moms who are gravitating towards Attachment Parenting there is a great event every year that I went to last year and plan to go to again this year called Mommy Con.  If you are interested in all things AP its worth at least checking it out. 




  • Options
    @FSUNole31 I said the same thing and DD will be 2 in September. I keep saying I'm going to take it away, but when shes yelling PASSIS at the top of her lungs I'm just like give her the paci.
  • Options

    I swore I wouldn't bed share this time around and here we are, bed sharing.  I love having my kids next to me when they are infants.  We shared a bed with our son until he was two and he now loves having his own room. 

    Being a mom is the hardest thing I've ever done and all the things you think you won't do before kids goes right out the window.  You gotta do what makes your family work. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • Options
    BMReid said:
    I never thought I'd bed-share, but I love it. And I never thought I'd give him formula. I wanted to EBF SO EFFING BAD, but it just hasn't worked out like I had hoped. I don't want to get into it too much because it makes me so upset. I hate his surgery was such a set-back :(
    Big hugs BM.

  • Options
    amt0312amt0312 member
    I thought I'd be a much more laid back mom. I'm not hyper-vigilant or helicopter like, but getting off to a rough start has really made me much more worried about every little thing than I thought I would be. I thought by now I'd be wanting to take DD out on a lot more outings and getting out of the house, but I feel like if we get thrown off our schedule, it will make things so much harder for us. Mostly, we just hang out at home and go for walks. 

    I was also just telling DH last night how much I miss the newborn period, but when I was in the midst of it, I absolutely hated it. 
  • Options
    @KaitiMac I seriously can't even handle the 2month picture of your LO! She is too cute!!

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    image  

     



     

     

     

  • Options
    Sgriff1Sgriff1 member
    I didn't give a single thought to cosleeping when I was pregnant. When I brought her home and she wouldn't sleep anywhere but on me I was sooo petrified to have her in bed with me. I didn't sleep for weeks because I was certain she was going to stop breathing or suffocate if I shut my eyes...ugh! I wish I would have relaxed and realized cosleeping can be done safely. I now love having her next to me and recently realized that I'm surprisingly "hippie" when it comes to my parenting style. I baby wear in our Moby, EBF, cosleep, and cloth diaper like a boss with no apologies to all my critics. And yes, I have plenty of family and friends shake their head at me and give me grief for all those things.

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Options
    We never thought we'd do bed-sharing, but as of right now, that our bed is the only place where Aeneas will sleep. We have a king size bed, so there's plenty of room. 

    I also thought I'd be EBFing for a lot longer than I did. I really struggled with my supply, and Aeneas would get so upset because he would be so hungry, and I just couldn't give him enough, so I had to stop BFing at 3mo. I know it was more upsetting for me than it was for Aeneas. 
    image

    Married 3/17/2005
    M/C #1 2005 - 6wks
    M/C #2 2006 - 7wks
    M/C #3 2008 - 11wks
    Baby Aeneas Born 1/20/2014
  • Options
    I really thought that by now DS would be sleeping in his own room and crib. But alas he's still sleeping in our room in the PNP. SO & I are on the same page that we want him to be able to roll over before we transition him. Of course this does not help out ST but between DS, chores, condensed work schedule and passing out by 10pm I'm not in the mood. I always vowed that DS wouldn't interfere with ST but clearly I was wrong and we haven't had any ST in months. :((
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Options
    Rebis58Rebis58 member
    I thought I would hate to share my LO and be overprotective of people holding/touching her, but I'm totally fine with anyone holding her, and actually like the break a lot of the time (she wants to be held most of the day)

    I thought I'd EBF til 6 months but I'm considering introducing solids sooner (she's almost 4 months)

    I thought I'd co-sleep (same room, but in a bassinet) til 6 months, but she went into her own room in a crib at 3 months - I wanted my space/privacy with H back and her sleep grunts woke me up

    Other than that I didn't have a lot of preconceived plans. A lot of my friends already have kids and so I saw what happens when you go into parenthood saying "I'll never..." and didn't want to put that kind of pressure on myself.
  • Options
    @tarajeannette‌ what is D-mer? I remember you talking about the sad feelings...

    I'm a STM and a lot has been different. I said I'd never bed share and didn't with DS. This time I had to or I'd never have rested. And I love it. I thought I'd be ready to quit bfing or pumping at 6 months like I did with DS. Nope. Even though I mostly pump now, I'm not even close to wanting to stop. Having a second has been much easier than I expected. We waited almost 5 years bc becoming parents with DS was so hard. We aren't laid back people and our world was rocked. The biggest change of all though has been the size of my heart. I thought I could never love another child like I do DS. And I do. My heart grew for her.
     
  • Options
    @tarajeannette‌ that is crazy. I had no idea that was a thing. The human body is so amazing. I never leak. Ever. The other day I was reading a fictional book about The Middle Ages and a baby was abandoned in the woods. About 15 mins later I noticed my right boob was leaking and I couldn't figure out why. DH was like are you thinking about babies? It dawned on me it was from reading about that baby. Boobs are weird.
     
  • Options
    Arya808 said:
    I did not think I'd be comfortable w/ NIP w/o a cover, but I actually kind of love it. I respect all the mamas who choose to cover up or who don't NIP at all, but I find it really empowering. I don't go whipping them out for everyone to see or anything, but it doesn't bother me when people walk by and see me BF'ing. The most surprising part is that my husband is getting used to the idea and being very supportive (which I did not think would happen). 
    Me too!  I even did it in front of my FIL a couple times, which I NEVER thought would happen.  It clearly made him a bit uncomfortable (he sat at a weird angle from me so he wouldn't have to look straight at me) but I just thought, "hey, if you can't handle this it's your problem, not mine" and nursed on. 
    ___________________________________________________________________________
    image
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Options

    I thought I would be all excited to start him on solid foods (picturing myself whipping up all these organic purees) but
    a) I will do BLW and purees, which I didn't anticipate because I didn't know about BLW until we all started discussing it here on TB.
    b) I love that he loves to BF.  I love knowing that I am providing him all the nourishment he needs.  I love BFing SO MUCH.

    So, people keep asking me when he will start with solid foods (including DH) but I don't feel either he or I are ready for that.  I want to tstay in our BF bubble for as long as possible.

    @thegosiers‌ I truly disliked BFing for a long time. First it was pain and engorgement, then cluster feeding. Then when it finally felt like it was regulating, I realized I was not having PPD, but in fact I was getting D-MER anytime I fed or pumped. Then lopsided supply. It's just a huge PITA. I do it for DD, but I didn't love it.

    But I'm finally feeling like I've got the hang of it and the Boobs of Sadness feeling is less. I really do enjoy it now. I'm glad to hear you're you are loving it!
    I'm glad to hear it has gotten better for you. Every nursing relationship is different, and sometimes it's best for everyone to try something different. Kudos to you for sticking with it through a tough start.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 


    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Options
    This is our second, and we never have a second to ourselves. If one of us gets five minutes, then we tag out and switch kids! I'm surprised we haven't lost 50 pounds just running around!
  • Options
    I wanted to be one of those moms that would be super active and go on hikes, walks, and parks with DD almost everyday.. yeah..its not happening at the moment. We love naptimes together way too much.
    I tried baby wearing with this awful humidity weather and it ain't happening, DD and I would have lost so much weight from sweating if we continued.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Options
    ccip82ccip82 member
    I did not realize how much energy it takes having two children. Sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed, but I would not change anything for the world.

    ________________________________________________________________________________________________

    image

    sibling love  

  • Options
    Rebis58Rebis58 member
    Arya808 said:
    Summer889 said:
    Arya808 said:
    I did not think I'd be comfortable w/ NIP w/o a cover, but I actually kind of love it. I respect all the mamas who choose to cover up or who don't NIP at all, but I find it really empowering. I don't go whipping them out for everyone to see or anything, but it doesn't bother me when people walk by and see me BF'ing. The most surprising part is that my husband is getting used to the idea and being very supportive (which I did not think would happen). 
    Me too!  I even did it in front of my FIL a couple times, which I NEVER thought would happen.  It clearly made him a bit uncomfortable (he sat at a weird angle from me so he wouldn't have to look straight at me) but I just thought, "hey, if you can't handle this it's your problem, not mine" and nursed on. 
    When MH's male relatives are around I still use a cover. MH used to be so adamant about me not NIP w/ a cover that I had to ease him into the idea, so to BF without a cover around his brothers and his father will definitely be another obstacle. I'm just waiting until he has adjusted to the idea until we take the next step. 

    I know this may sound like I am too worried about how he feels about it, which I sort of am...a little. But my main reason to try to get him on board is that I know I need his support if I'm going to meet my BF'ing goals. 
    @Arya808 I get it, and I feel the same way. I wouldn't NOT feed DD the way I want JUST because H didn't feel comfortable, but I have had conversations with H about his comfort level. I do consider his comfort to a certain extent, as long as his preferences don't impact my and DD's comfort or success breastfeeding. It helps that our comfort levels are pretty much the same (I'll nurse in front of anyone, but I cover in public and in front of male friends/his male family members, because that's what I feel comfortable with)
  • Options
    I never thought I would be comfortable NIP especially without a cover.

     Also as a pp mentioned I am obsessed where at family gatherings I get annoyed when I can't hold him. I love him so much and I want to enjoy him at these occasions too. 

    I never knew I would be able to stay at home f/t (was not the plan but is what ended up happening) and now I can't imagine having to leave him.

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

  • Options
    km_mdkm_md member

    Arya808 said:
    Rebis58 said:
    Arya808 said:
    Summer889 said:
    Arya808 said:
    I did not think I'd be comfortable w/ NIP w/o a cover, but I actually kind of love it. I respect all the mamas who choose to cover up or who don't NIP at all, but I find it really empowering. I don't go whipping them out for everyone to see or anything, but it doesn't bother me when people walk by and see me BF'ing. The most surprising part is that my husband is getting used to the idea and being very supportive (which I did not think would happen). 
    Me too!  I even did it in front of my FIL a couple times, which I NEVER thought would happen.  It clearly made him a bit uncomfortable (he sat at a weird angle from me so he wouldn't have to look straight at me) but I just thought, "hey, if you can't handle this it's your problem, not mine" and nursed on. 
    When MH's male relatives are around I still use a cover. MH used to be so adamant about me not NIP w/ a cover that I had to ease him into the idea, so to BF without a cover around his brothers and his father will definitely be another obstacle. I'm just waiting until he has adjusted to the idea until we take the next step. 

    I know this may sound like I am too worried about how he feels about it, which I sort of am...a little. But my main reason to try to get him on board is that I know I need his support if I'm going to meet my BF'ing goals. 
    @Arya808 I get it, and I feel the same way. I wouldn't NOT feed DD the way I want JUST because H didn't feel comfortable, but I have had conversations with H about his comfort level. I do consider his comfort to a certain extent, as long as his preferences don't impact my and DD's comfort or success breastfeeding. It helps that our comfort levels are pretty much the same (I'll nurse in front of anyone, but I cover in public and in front of male friends/his male family members, because that's what I feel comfortable with)
    @Rebis58 Very true. BF'ing is hard enough without feeling ashamed or worried about what others might think. 

    When I do NIP I am always expecting someone to say something negative to me, so I have several comebacks in case that happens. My personal fav is, if someone says to me "Ew, you should cover up. Nobody wants to see that" I'd tell them "That's so funny, I was just thinking the same thing about your face!" 

    abrn 
    I was nursing at a baseball game (covered and by my own family) and some guy was staring at me with a nasty face as he walked by. So I asked him if he had a problem and he got all mad and tried saying that he was just going to the bathroom and then yelled at my dad. So weird. 


  • Options
    ArrgcrArrgcr member
    I really thought DH would step it up a notch this time around I should've known though because I got no help with DS while I worked two jobs, what would make me think he'd help now that I don't work?

    I sleep more. That's changed a lot. I have suffered with insomnia for years and since I had her, I sleep so much better. She still wakes up every 2-3 hrs but I sleep amazing, enough to keep the house looking better. A little better anyways...
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"