Anybody else have mixed feelings on this Mother's Day?

JCM285

I truly hope that you all say "no" and that you are all enjoying your day to the utmost.  I am just saying this because PGAL brain is getting the best of me this weekend and although I am happy to say this is my first Mother's Day as a pregnant woman ever, I still don't feel like outwardly celebrating.  My mother and MIL came over today and we made them breakfast but I had a headache the entire time and couldn't keep my mind off the fact that my next appt. and U/S is tomorrow.  This is esp. unnerving, because during my first pregnancy, I lost my LO at about 10 1/2 weeks and it was a missed m/c.  Tomorrow I will be 9w6d, so I am very quickly approaching this milestone.  When I saw my chiropractor yesterday (who knows about my history of loss and current pregnancy), he said, "Well, why don't you look happy?" and I replied, "I'm not unhappy.  I'm just nervous."  I don't know any other way to describe it.  DH and our moms are starting to get excited about it again.  We even flipped through a baby name book for fun.  This is exactly what was happening Feb. 2013 before my first m/c and I feel as though I'm experiencing de ja vu.  I guess that's why I have mixed feelings about this Mother's Day.  Anybody else?

KMW08

It's really just another day to me. As a matter of fact I actually bought a MALE coworker lunch & told him happy Mother's Day & Nurses Week LOL he loved it.

I asked dh if he was doing anything for me, his reply "hell no! I'm not jinxing anything!" Men. Smh. Although I somewhat side with him shhhhh

JenniferAnn1972

I understand your feelings & wish you the best for this pregnancy.

E&B0811

I understand where you are coming from. Before today I was excited because, like you, this is my first Mother's Day as a pregnant mama. But, throughout the day I have received the sweetest text messages from some of my friends that know about our three losses.

I guess I just hadn't really considered how sad I would feel about my angels despite this awesome, healthy Vigorous Baby I am carrying right now. We haven't told anyone except my mom about the baby yet so I'm also feeling conflicted about the love I'm getting - like I'm lying to my friends. YKWIM?

Anyhow, all this to say I get where you are coming from. (((Hugs)))

mmsweeney1

Sorry your first Mother's Day wasn't the best it could be - I think we all understand the mixed feelings around here. Good luck tomorrow!!

MommaAshley12

I understand where you are coming from. Last Mother's Day I was miscarrying my first baby and it was a very sad day for me. I can't help but be a little sad today even though I have a healthy, fat baby in my belly. I hope you have a great appt tomorrow and get to see your sweet LO growing well. Big (((hugs))) and Happy Mother's Day to you!!

JCM285

Thanks ladies and big hugs to all of you too! I think being PGAL just puts a different spin on meaningful holidays for us in general. So sorry @MommaAshley12‌ that today had also an especially sad undertone to it although I am happy we are all in a better place today. Sending you my T&Ps for a continued H&H 9 months!

sweetpea2003

I understand that deja vu feeling. Last year I had my u/s where we discovered my miscarriage the week after a family vacation. I have an u/s this Thursday... and last week we were on a family vacation. The timing does not escape my PGAL brain. I sincerely hope you have a wonderful ultrasound today and can break out your baby naming book with confidence later .

LifeofCat

You made it through yesterday (((hugs))) I understand these conflicting feelings. I wish you all the best for your ultrasound.

This was my first Mother's Day without my mother and Marianne. Although I'm not fond of "Hallmark" holidays, I was dreading it. I cried the night before, but I'm proud to say I did not let my PGAL brain nor my mama's loss get the best of me, for their sake. I dragged my ass outside and had breakfast with friends (DH was gone for the weekend) and had a delicious lobster meal with my father and sister. I am grateful for Marianne and her little sister-to-be for making me a mother, and that I wasn't too mopey about my own mother; it's not what she would have wanted. 

I hope today is a better day for you

JCM285

Totally with all of you on the jinxing thing. We ended up having a really great appointment today so we are super relieved though!