How do I not see UO?

PrimRoseMama

Let's do this!

My UO:
I really dislike other moms in public who act like they are above you when your kid has a tantrum.

Case in point: there is a lady with a big dog & an 18 month old. DD is afraid of the big dog at the vet hospital so we have a meltdown. I talk her down etc. so after some water Abby settles down on a bench to color. I strike up conversation with the mom. "Your daughter is cute! How old?" She gives me this disgusted look & tells me 18 months old like she wants to spit.

The 18 month old goes over to Abby & Abby offers her crayons. The other mom pulls her away & is like "oh no, we don't play with bad girls."

/record stops

I wanted to rip her face off & toss it on the high way. Instead, I asked if her daughter was her only child. She gave me a horse faced blank look. "Yes, she is my only child..."

So I said, "oh so you don't have a two year old yet? Well then, please don't call my daughter a 'bad girl'. She's two. She got scared by your dog. She's over it & is being nice to your kid. Seriously out of line. She didn't hit, scream, bite or harm your kid. She offered her a damn crayon. WTF is wrong with you?"

She sat in silence & let the girls play.

JFC people!

sparkymcgeee

Oh prim I can feel the mommy anger swelling. Like full on adrenaline rage burning in my belly. I love your response. I'm scared of dogs so yeah I wouldn't be surprised if my two year old would be. Ugh.

PrimRoseMama

Meimsx said:

Oh prim I can feel the mommy anger swelling. Like full on adrenaline rage burning in my belly. I love your response. I'm scared of dogs so yeah I wouldn't be surprised if my two year old would be. Ugh.

:x

sparkymcgeee

Mormons don't believe in original sin. We believe that men will be punished for their own sins and not for Adam's transgressions. So we don't believe that if a baby dies they are damned. We baptize at eight or older when they truly understand right from wrong and understand the covenant they are making. I just have a hard time believing that a child that young isn't pure and innocent.

PrimRoseMama

@Lelo2006‌ : she would most likely be happy. I think it was the combo of new place & big dog.

sparkymcgeee

But technically isn't the Catholic doctrine that they end up in purgatory or limbo? I think that's incredibly sad.

jennipalmer

Not sure if this is UO but reading @PrimRoseMama‌ I think many animal owners aren't as aware as they should be. I am not saying all of them but many. I have English mastiff and a boxer. I know my mastiff is 150 pound baby but I keep her by my side when other people are around because there are adults terrified of her. I do hate the "she will eat the baby" comments! I get pissed when people have the little yappy dogs off leash because they think it is ok for a 10 pound terror to run around (again not all little dogs are bad but I think the ones who's owners are uppity and think their dog won't do anything are fooling themselves)
Someone's off leash pomeranian went ape shit barking and nipping my mastiff who then barked back once in warning. The owner starting with comments "oh puppy that dog will eat you" and I politely informed her not if she leashed her dog because small dogs can be just as dangerous and it is the law. Dogs are dogs no matter the size!

24karat

My music-themed UO for this week:

Aside from one or two individual songs I strongly dislike music by Lorde, Lea Michele, and Ellie Goulding.

Lelo2006

I think it's a little crazy when 3-4 year olds still have pacifiers.

PrimRoseMama

Don't you know? Only Mormons go to Heaven according to South Park!

@Meimsx‌ I kid, I kid. I've got mad respect for The Mormon Church.

Just one question: I heard that the husband gets to decide for the wife if she goes to Heaven in the Mormon church? That isn't true right?! Also something about getting their own planet. Jesus visited North America during the three days between crucifixion & resurrection?

Honestly, I'm seriously curious? Not trying to give you crap.

PrimRoseMama

Lelo2006 said:

I think it's a little crazy when 3-4 year olds still have pacifiers.

DD will be 3 in October. We have tried to get her off it. We are down to night time & the occasional use in public if she is having an epic meltdown.

I used to be Judgy about this too. Then life trout-slapped me with a kid that loves her pacifier. :P

Lelo2006

Chunkymonkeylvr said:

Lelo2006 said:

I think it's a little crazy when 3-4 year olds still have pacifiers.

I judged till myDD struggled to drop the addiction. I think by three we were night time only.

I think I can get behind using it for sleeping when they are older, but I just think it's a little weird when they're walking around during the day with one. It just seems like a plug to keep them from talking? Idk. My kid never took one so maybe if he had I would feel differently?

sparkymcgeee

PrimRoseMama said:

Don't you know? Only Mormons go to Heaven according to South Park! @Meimsx‌ I kid, I kid. I've got mad respect for The Mormon Church. Just one question: I heard that the husband gets to decide for the wife if she goes to Heaven in the Mormon church? That isn't true right?! Also something about getting their own planet. Jesus visited North America during the three days between crucifixion & resurrection? Honestly, I'm seriously curious? Not trying to give you crap.

Oh that's a lot. I'll PM you @primrosemama

MRads

I sucked my finger till I was embarrassingly old. Judge my parents away )

As if theycouldstop me from doing something I was determined to do.

Lelo2006

ramy3695 said:

I judge people who have never had a 3 year old and yet still judge other parents to the point of being "ragey". It's so fucking ridiculous. You have no clue what that family is going through or what that child needs or what those parents have tried.

I'm not ragey about pacifiers... I'm just more like, how did it get to that point? Then I feel bad because breaking the habit probably sucks.

Again, I'm probably just jealous because my kid spit out the pacifier and looked at me like I was insane when I tried :P

jennipalmer

@Lelo2006‌ I am not a fan of thumb sucking. I know adults who thumb suck and I am kind of uncomfortable when I am talking to them but that's my neurosis.

martyn17

Meimsx said:

But technically isn't the Catholic doctrine that they end up in purgatory or limbo? I think that's incredibly sad.

Not anymore, that doctrine has changed.  

martyn17

I think Prim should move, because she encounters too many crazy rude people.  If I lived had to deal with that level of rudeness, I would be arrested.  

Lelo2006

Also, I'm glad that there are nice btdt moms on the board who remember what it was like to be a "judgy" ftm and they don't get all ragey over stuff like my pacifier comment

lancomechica

Laurendag said:

ramy3695 said:

Laurendag said:

I judge people who are passive aggressive. Isn't that ironic?

I thought it was pretty obvious who I was talking about. I'll make it easier for you. I judge you for judging other parents.

You can judge whatever the fuck you want to. And I'm going to keep judging the parents whose 4 year old still has a pacifier in public. And I'm not a bit sorry for it.

I think we need to look at this as...is this harming the child/society as whole, other children or people.
To me it's not and I wouldn't judge. But...I judge the parents of the 10 year old who was caught selling pot at school in CO. WTF, parents?

[Deleted User]

@laurendag %-(  

I don't think that was passive aggressive, or was it?

ETA: Did you participate in the anger poll from yesterday? 

KikiCohen

I don't understand why everything turns into an argument these days.

Altima80

Page 3 and already going down hill. I shouldn't be surprised.

KikiCohen

Triscuits > Ritz

sparkymcgeee

lizabethann06 said:

Warning! Passive aggressive alert below. I just thought of another spot for the next bingo card.

Cupcake duel?

opheliainwaders

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Preach, mama. I will tear down anyone who disagrees, just TRY ME.

[Deleted User]

Black Pepper Triscuits are amazing.

At least we aren't "fighting" over something that's going to hurt that many feelings this week... and that makes me happy :-*

KikiCohen

Iand LoveandYou said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Disagree.   Townhouse > than all others
I like their oval shape.
I won't back down on this.  SorrynotSorry


I must admit that the townhouse crackers that are pretzels on top are pretty darn tasty.

KikiCohen

LadyBlue07 said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Ugh, Triscuits are so gross. How can you think they're good, @KikiCohen‌ ???

I love love love them! I could probably eat a box in one sitting. Especially the dill flavored ones. Nom!

KikiCohen

Asbromle said:

Black Pepper Triscuits are amazing.

At least we aren't "fighting" over something that's going to hurt that many feelings this week... and that makes me happy :-*

Truth. On both accounts.

opheliainwaders

ramy3695 said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Wheat Thins > Triscuits

BLASPHEMY

TheLittleRedM

Triscuits are disgusting. Their texture is gross. This is also the reason I think Wheaties are gross. 

Rice crackers > all. 

I don't eat crackers often...

Cheez-Itz FTW!

opheliainwaders

I am eating Triscuits RIGHT NOW, beeyotches.

KikiCohen

gulickr said:

I am eating Triscuits RIGHT NOW, beeyotches.

I'm jealous! P is napping on me so I can't get up. Booooo nap jail!

TheLittleRedM

Muirmaid said:

Triscuits are disgusting. Their texture is gross. This is also the reason I think Wheaties are gross. 

Rice crackers > all. 

I don't eat crackers often...

Cheez-Itz FTW!

I really struggled with this. Can't love tit because you're wrong about triscuits, but... cheez-its! I wish I could give you a half-tit.

I'll forgive you I don't expect this one to get many love tits. It's pretty unpopular Lol Except the cheez-it part.

coco2787

I think 1st birthday parties should be low-key.

coco2787

Mamasighs said:

Cfreymc said:

I think 1st birthday parties should be low-key.

BOOM

I agree with you but still. BOOM

Had to stir things up a bit. Cracker talk is boring.

sparkymcgeee

I totally bought Cheez-its this morning before the great cracker debate of 2014. So win one for me.

Wheat thins are delicious.

Triscuits are not unless they are flavored, Triscuit thins, or they are covered in cheese.

Saltines are boring but I still like them.

Ritz and townhouse are both in my mid-range cracker palate.

opheliainwaders

KikiCohen said:

I am eating Triscuits RIGHT NOW, beeyotches.

I'm jealous! P is napping on me so I can't get up. Booooo nap jail!

*throws triscuits at you*

KikiCohen

etoille said:

KikiCohen said:

LadyBlue07 said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Ugh, Triscuits are so gross. How can you think they're good, @KikiCohen‌ ???

I love love love them! I could probably eat a box in one sitting. Especially the dill flavored ones. Nom!

Do bagel chips count as a cracker or a chip?

A chip? I have no clue.

KikiCohen

Chunkymonkeylvr said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Hell no

Yes! *stamps foot*

jennipalmer

We are going to Disneyland for Liam's first birthday but I have never done a big first birthday party. However, every year since her first birthday my DD has had pretty big parties. DS1 usually opts for larger gifts to parties. A

opheliainwaders

KikiCohen said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Ugh, Triscuits are so gross. How can you think they're good, @KikiCohen‌ ???

I love love love them! I could probably eat a box in one sitting. Especially the dill flavored ones. Nom!

Do bagel chips count as a cracker or a chip?

A chip? I have no clue.

I vote chip, since they don't have a uniform shape like crackers do. (who knew I had such feelings about this??)

lancomechica

Triscuits are gross.
I am over doing the first bday party and I don't care...I worry I may not get to do another one so whatever. I have rented the place and hired a photog. I am low key in other things

opheliainwaders

etoille said:

gulickr said:

KikiCohen said:

KikiCohen said:

Triscuits > Ritz

Ugh, Triscuits are so gross. How can you think they're good, @KikiCohen‌ ???

I love love love them! I could probably eat a box in one sitting. Especially the dill flavored ones. Nom!

Do bagel chips count as a cracker or a chip?

A chip? I have no clue.

I vote chip, since they don't have a uniform shape like crackers do. (who knew I had such feelings about this??)

Ok then what about bruschetta toasts?

I think those belong in @livvyx's "novelty toast" category.

ceechie

3 years old and his life is already headed down hill.... So sad.

sparkymcgeee

I'm on the birthday party boat. I think it's pretty significant that your baby has just completed his or her first year of life. The first year is such a dramatic year. From completely dependent and fragile with no real cognizant anything to walking, talking, understanding, and some independence. I think that should be celebrated.

But I don't do parties other years. Milestone birthdays only. One is a milestone birthday in my opinion. I do agree it's not for the baby. It's for the parents but I still feel it's important. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to do something for the first birthday though. It's a lot of work, time, money and energy.

[Deleted User]

Meimsx said:

I'm on the birthday party boat. I think it's pretty significant that your baby has just completed his or her first year of life. The first year is such a dramatic year. From completely dependent and fragile with no real cognizant anything to walking, talking, understanding, and some independence. I think that should be celebrated.

But I don't do parties other years. Milestone birthdays only. One is a milestone birthday in my opinion. I do agree it's not for the baby. It's for the parents but I still feel it's important. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to do something for the first birthday though. It's a lot of work, time, money and energy.

I agree with everything you just wrote. You said it perfectly  \:D/

blairwitch

On the paci issue - I judged before kids and still do.  While all situations are not created equal...my feelings came from spending 9+ hrs a day with 8-12 2-3yr olds.  While not my kids...my coworkers and I would spend the day helping to break paci addications (usually at parent request)  to only have the parent walk in and pop the paci in the childs mouth before they walked out the door.  No prompting from the child either.

Crackers - Ritz and anything similar is icky.  Love Wheat Thins and Triscuits  

I can never think of an UO that hasnt been mentioned or discussed before...

karen0477

I'm a fan of the big first birthday party. We do an open house and this year I'm excited that, for once, it will be in the summer....my other two are fall babies. I already have allies dress, decorations and plates, cups, etc. I also have her cake planned out.....can't help it, I get excited for their first birthday!!

EVA116

Chicken in a Biskit Crackers > every other cracker

I think a big first birthday party is awesome. I think I might do a trucks theme....

 

jennipalmer

@Chunkymonkeylvr‌ wanna meet at Disneyland? :-)

jennipalmer

That would be funny if you were there same day as us. We are going 14th through 16th Liam birthday is 15th

coco2787

Meimsx said:

I'm on the birthday party boat. I think it's pretty significant that your baby has just completed his or her first year of life. The first year is such a dramatic year. From completely dependent and fragile with no real cognizant anything to walking, talking, understanding, and some independence. I think that should be celebrated.

But I don't do parties other years. Milestone birthdays only. One is a milestone birthday in my opinion. I do agree it's not for the baby. It's for the parents but I still feel it's important. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to do something for the first birthday though. It's a lot of work, time, money and energy.

I don't see how keeping it low key means that you aren't acknowledging any of this? I plan on celebrating the first year of his life, I'm just not going to turn into a huge headache for myself.

sparkymcgeee

Cfreymc said:

I'm on the birthday party boat. I think it's pretty significant that your baby has just completed his or her first year of life. The first year is such a dramatic year. From completely dependent and fragile with no real cognizant anything to walking, talking, understanding, and some independence. I think that should be celebrated.

But I don't do parties other years. Milestone birthdays only. One is a milestone birthday in my opinion. I do agree it's not for the baby. It's for the parents but I still feel it's important. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to do something for the first birthday though. It's a lot of work, time, money and energy.

I don't see how keeping it low key means that you aren't acknowledging any of this? I plan on celebrating the first year of his life, I'm just not going to turn into a huge headache for myself.

I didn't say it wasn't acknowledging it. I was referring to the people that say they don't plan on doing anything because the baby won't know the difference. And if you feel it would cause you a headache to do a party then don't. But just because others feel like it's a bigger deal than you do doesn't mean we are giving ourselves headaches or think our way is better. It's just want we want and like to do.

PrimRoseMama

We did something small for DD's first year, but that is because we didn't know that many other kids to invite.

For Alex's party we are going to something medium sized here at the house. Ball pit, bubble machine, crayon station & stuff. We will have a musician that the kids love come too.

Also, what counts as a "big To-Do"? I have mom friend's that own half-million dollar homes in the hill country. Their parties had a petting zoo, face paint, & entertainers. To them that was "small". However they do Great Gatsby type things on the regular.

ilovemyducks21

gulickr said:

I am eating Triscuits RIGHT NOW, beeyotches.

Me. Too. The Dill, Sea Salt, and Olive Oil variety. Yum. AND I have Cheez-itz for later. Best. Day. Ever.

sparkymcgeee

PrimRoseMama said:

For Alex's party we are going to something medium sized here at the house. Ball pit, bubble machine, crayon station & stuff. We will have a musician that the kids love come too.

 

Also, what counts as a "big To-Do"?

For me this counts as a big To-Do. So maybe I'm in the low key group afterall. Not really. I'm maybe a bit smaller than this.

We'll go to the park and I'll invite some of the babies that were born within six weeks or so of him (three off the top of my head) and my family. I will have gift bags and we'll do a coloring station but that's about it. Food and cake and done.

EVA116

Chicken in a Biskit

PrimRoseMama

Also do we need to have a bday party sticky thread?

Lelo2006

We are having a small family birthday (who am I kidding, the family is like 30
people...) and a joint birthday with all my friends from breastfeeding support group. There are 9 boys! :x

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

coco2787

BetsyD2010 said:

Cfreymc said:

Meimsx said:

I'm on the birthday party boat. I think it's pretty significant that your baby has just completed his or her first year of life. The first year is such a dramatic year. From completely dependent and fragile with no real cognizant anything to walking, talking, understanding, and some independence. I think that should be celebrated.

But I don't do parties other years. Milestone birthdays only. One is a milestone birthday in my opinion. I do agree it's not for the baby. It's for the parents but I still feel it's important. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to do something for the first birthday though. It's a lot of work, time, money and energy.

I don't see how keeping it low key means that you aren't acknowledging any of this? I plan on celebrating the first year of his life, I'm just not going to turn into a huge headache for myself.

I think the difference is it was said the first birthdays *should* be low key. They can be low key if that's your thing but there's also nothing wrong when they are big. I don't think I could tell someone how they *should or shouldn't* celebrate their baby. Ya know?

That's why it's a UO. To each their own.

arlingirl

I like all the crackers. Nom. I'm hungry now, too...ya dumb wh0res.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

sparkymcgeee

mystererae said:

mermomo5 said:

Meimsx said:

The Catholic Church in my view suffers from do as I say but we won't and don't.

Dunno, I think this is all religions...
Hmmm, I don't know about this. I don't think so for my religion.

sparkymcgeee

mystererae said:

Meimsx said:

mystererae said:

mermomo5 said:

Meimsx said:

The Catholic Church in my view suffers from do as I say but we won't and don't.

Dunno, I think this is all religions...

Hmmm, I don't know about this. I don't think so for my religion.

What I mean is there's going to be scandal no matter what because we're all human. So for me personally I don't judge the worth of my religion (to me) by the actions of its administration.
Ok but aren't those people supposed to be called of God? Like the Pope is supposed to be God's representative on earth according to the Catholic church right? So shouldn't the doctrine be consistent down to the lowest priest if he says it's that way? I get that priests are different as far as scandal but if the Pope says one thing shouldn't the priests teach that doctrine? We don't get to just make up our own beliefs if they are contrary to official church doctrine. Not in my opinion. You can choose not to follow but in my church you wouldn't be able to partake of the blessings if you don't. Like for example, in order to enter the Mormon temple you have to follow certain guidelines. Paying tithing is one of those. For a long time I had a hard time with that doctrine because I couldn't see it in my budget. I couldn't enter into the temple because of that. Does any of this make sense?

lancomechica

@EVA116‌
Chicken is a biskit...nasty.

EVA116

lancomechica said:

@EVA116‌ Chicken is a biskit...nasty.

shun

PrimRoseMama

EVA116 said:

lancomechica said:

@EVA116‌
Chicken is a biskit...nasty.

shun


Double shun! :P

SMac85

We did a big 1st birthday for DS1 and he hated it. He cried the entire time because he was so overwhelmed. For DS2 we have decided to go to the new Ripleys aquarium as a family and then have immediate family over after for cake. With that being said I already have his 2nd birthday planned so I am definitely not opposed to big birthdays! We are having a "travelling zoo" come to the house and his favours are going to be mini muskoka chairs personalized with each kids name. This wAy they all have a seat for the show.

sparkymcgeee

I totally get that but I didn't think that was the conversation we were having. That is a completely separate issue. Since the conversation was "isn't this church doctrine?" Then you said "I don't know any priests or nuns that believe that." If it's church doctrine shouldn't the priests be teaching that and not inserting their own beliefs?

Stina2012

I may steal the watermelon idea. It's a cute one!

grapeskittles4lyfe

Not an UO (I think...?) but 

YES please do a 1st BDay sticky! We're not doing anything big but I would love to see what everyone else is doing (or has done, as my LO is one of the August stragglers). With or without babies in the pictures @etoille , just themes/decorations is enough.

Pleeeeease?

theuntaggablek

Club > wheat thins
Wheat thins > triscuits
Triscuits > Ritz
Ritz = townhouse
Any cracker > chicken in a biscuit

In other news...
Cheese > cheese whiz

Everything bagels ruin everything. (That's the UO. )

Altima80

Wheat Thins are nasssssty.

Chicken in a Biskut are good until you overdose.

theuntaggablek

Out of curiosity, are blankies perceived to be as terrible as pacis @ 3 or 4?

Why or why not?

(This week DH initiated operation no more blankie. I am not completely sold but am going along and gritting my teeth through the sobs of "I want my blankie.")

ceechie

I just don't really understand why we have to break young toddlers of habits that don't really do anything bad. First we give them binkies to help sooth them, then we take them away?
Yes, I want my son not to be so dependent. But I'm not going to rip something that, in his little 3 years of life, has given him great comfort from his lips. The pic I posted, he was at the zoo. We went with a big group and he was having some anxiety. He was crying for it and upset. I'd rather him look crazy with a binkie and enjoy a day out then sobbing in a corner bc he should be weened off it. His binkie is his lovey. And he'll grow out of it. And I'm ok if it takes a minute because guess what, he will be just fine. And I'm sure he won't take it to college...

theuntaggablek

DH was worried about how it affects his teeth (he chews on it all night.) He doesn't use it at nap anymore so DH thought we should eliminate it at bedtime too.

Didn't mean to hijack UO with blankie talk.

sdtchica13

My two cents:

* I'm not touching the religion/god stuff.

* We are doing it up big for the first birthday, but I love to throw a good party, so I do this every year, lol!

* I agree with @laurendag about the paci thing, and I am a BTDT mom. I don't get ragey about it, but I do think that there is no discernible reason for a three year old to have a paci in public (barring a medical issue, sensory issue, etc.) One of my BFF's didn't take the paci away until after 3 because she didn't want to deal with it, and that I majorly judged. 

SMac85

ken&kendra said:

Out of curiosity, are blankies perceived to be as terrible as pacis @ 3 or 4? Why or why not? (This week DH initiated operation no more blankie. I am not completely sold but am going along and gritting my teeth through the sobs of "I want my blankie.")

My son still sleeps with his bunny and I have no intention of taking that away yet. I think that falls under the same category as blanket

theuntaggablek

Eek! I turned uo into a CIO thread thing, huh.

The teeth thing does seem real but I probably would be inclined to let him keep the blankie. I didn't want to send a mixed message or contradict his dad though who takes the lead on his bedtime while I get the baby to bed. If it makes you feel better @lizabethann06 he is surrounded by stuffed animals and peacefully sleeping at this moment.

SMac85

@lizabethann06 that's why we have two of the exact same bunny. Matteo chews on the bunny ears and I am constantly washing it. It was easier to have two so if one was in the wash he wouldn't be without it.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

theuntaggablek

@Mamasighs‌ He's about 3.5 so maybe we could've waited it out.

DH isn't heartless...he still has his bear, monkey and owl...and the lullabies....just no blankie.

ceechie

sdtchica13 said:

My two cents:

* I'm not touching the religion/god stuff.

* We are doing it up big for the first birthday, but I love to throw a good party, so I do this every year, lol!

* I agree with @laurendag about the paci thing, and I am a BTDT mom. I don't get ragey about it, but I do think that there is no discernible reason for a three year old to have a paci in public (barring a medical issue, sensory issue, etc.) One of my BFF's didn't take the paci away until after 3 because she didn't want to deal with it, and that I majorly judged. 

But when you see a toddler out and about with one, you don't know the back story. You don't know if there is a discernible reason or one that you qualify as "good enough" for the binkie. People probably think I'm lazy, too. I doubt they think about what's really happening. That maybe the little boy is probably stressed out because his mom had twins this year. That maybe his mom is helping his use it less but you're seeing him on a bad day.
And really, what makes them so bad?! Our dentist says it's a teeth issue if they use around 5yo. His language is great, as per his pediatrician. I'm working with him, but I also am going to pick my battles with this one. Not so cut and dry.

theuntaggablek

@Mamasighs‌ Exactly right?!

Part of me totally agrees with @ceechie and @Citrusfamily‌ and @lizabethann06‌ .

Part of me thinks that if you could see the spittle-soaked, chewed-on, germ-laden piece of cloth we're talking about--the one I've attempted to oxyclean and bleach in the sun 100x and was embarrassed to send to daycare because of its stains that you would think me terrible for letting it pass near my son's mouth!

sdtchica13

ceechie said:

My two cents:

* I'm not touching the religion/god stuff.

* We are doing it up big for the first birthday, but I love to throw a good party, so I do this every year, lol!

* I agree with @laurendag about the paci thing, and I am a BTDT mom. I don't get ragey about it, but I do think that there is no discernible reason for a three year old to have a paci in public (barring a medical issue, sensory issue, etc.) One of my BFF's didn't take the paci away until after 3 because she didn't want to deal with it, and that I majorly judged. 

But when you see a toddler out and about with one, you don't know the back story. You don't know if there is a discernible reason or one that you qualify as "good enough" for the binkie. People probably think I'm lazy, too. I doubt they think about what's really happening. That maybe the little boy is probably stressed out because his mom had twins this year. That maybe his mom is helping his use it less but you're seeing him on a bad day. And really, what makes them so bad?! Our dentist says it's a teeth issue if they use around 5yo. His language is great, as per his pediatrician. I'm working with him, but I also am going to pick my battles with this one. Not so cut and dry.

Like, I said, I don't get ragey about it, but I also think there are other age appropriate ways for a kid to find comfort. Also, other dentists disagree with yours and may have told you to ditch the paci by now (mine would have). I try not to judge because you don't know if a kid has sensory issues or someother medical reason to have one, but I did judge the heck out of my BFF (and my SIL for that matter) for just "not wanting to deal with it".

I will say that Corri was not a paci kid...once she realized no food came out of it, she had zero interest. So, I have never had to deal with taking one away, but Gavin is a paci kid (not an addict by any stretch, but he does like them), and my goal is to cold turkey him at one before he gets too attached. We'll see if I succeed in a few months. 

I do feel that a blankie or stuffed animal is very different than a paci, mostly because they are often not public. Corri has a dog (bingo) that she has had since she's 14 months old, and I would never dream of taking that away, but she also knows he stays home and is not for public view (unless we go on vacation, then he travels by suitcase, lol). 

theuntaggablek

Oh no-- I didn't want to underscore the idea of your actions as lazy at all @Mamasighs‌ . Your description of the wad behind the teeth sounded exactly like what our guy does....and that's what resonated.

theuntaggablek

Can we go back to triscuits?

theuntaggablek

Ummmm hot triscuits?

theuntaggablek

For the record, S will be participating with full parental support in take your stuffed animal to school day tomorrow.

KateJuly2013

Everybody judges everybody about everything all the time. It all cancels out in the end.

[Deleted User]

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sdtchica13

Mamasighs said:

Why is the dog not for public view? I'm seriously so confused right now. It's like this whole other world of parenting opened up just at this moment.

Not that its not for public view, more that its just not a good idea to bring it out and about with us. When she was little, she had a stuffed lamb and Sophie that we took EVERYWHERE, and I had no issues with it. The difference with bingo is that he's (yup, it's a he) bigger and has also been through the washing machine many times and may not make it through too many more wash cycles, so we try to limit its outside exposure because I'd rather her have bingo to sleep with instead of bingo in pieces coming out of the washing machine, lol.

That is not to say she doesn't bring other little things out and about with us occasionally, just that some things are best left at home. I don't think I'd let her bring a blankie out with us either, mostly because I'd be afraid of it getting destroyed or her tripping over it. However, like I said above, I have no problem with her sleeping with a stuffed animal forever...hell, my little sis brought her blankie to college and it now sits on her marital bed, lol!

sdtchica13

lizabethann06 said:

Why is the dog not for public view? I'm seriously so confused right now. It's like this whole other world of parenting opened up just at this moment.

Mister Bear comes everywhere with us. He was even in family pictures a few weeks ago. Jack's just a kid!

Right! I mean, right?

I'm so confused. Until this very moment, I never knew there were people who took away blankies from their little ones or didn't let their young kids bring stuffed animals out in public. I learn something new everyday. I wish I hadn't lol.

Soooo....basically, you are judging those parents who don't allow their kids to bring stuffed animals out in public?  )

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theuntaggablek

Citrusfamily said:

Can we go back to triscuits?

As soon as you tell me he has it back The daycare comment makes me think you do have more ego than hygiene in your decision. Please tell me I'm wrong. Sorry I just have all the sorries for him. It's his security in this crazy world.

I'm not following you here. 

DH has a legitimate, albeit unpopular, concern about the blanket's effect on the child's teeth. LO depends on it for comfort. I do think the blanket probably has germs, even though we gave him a freshly washed one nightly. All things being equal, I would probably say that the risk to his teeth is not so great that we couldn't wait another year until the blanket doesn't mean so much. DH & his dentist think otherwise. Since the kid has other comfort objects that he doesn't chew - a bear, monkey, etc. - I am willing to cede and encouraging him to squeeze Baxter Bear extra tight, and checking his windows an extra time to make sure there's no monsters.

Does he miss his blankie? Yes. Do I wish he wasn't sad? Yes.

Is he all alone in a cold crazy world? No. Does he stop crying within minutes? Yes.

Tomorrow really is, in a twist of irony, "take your stuffed animal to school" day at daycare. And we are encouraging him to bring one.

Does this mean "ego over hygiene"? I don't know - I'm not sure what you mean.

theuntaggablek

Also, I took Bingo Bear to college and was horrified when my roommate kidnapped him and held him hostage once. She even left a ransom note!

ceechie

Wine is my pacifier.

cuterusaurus

@lancomechica said:

@EVA116‌
Chicken in a biskit...tasty.

Ftfy!

theuntaggablek

@citrusfamily

Thanks for clarifying - I just wasn't sure what you meant before. Sure - we can disagree on this one. I don't floss everyday either.

queenbone

My problem with pacifiers for non-babies is that I can't understand wth they are trying to say when they are talking to me with their mouth full. And I think it is rude. I guess it is fine if you allow them to speak to you that way and you spend your time trying to decipher what they are saying, but I'm not their parent it isn't my job. And it is hard enough to understand what some toddlers are saying anyway as they are learning to talk w/o having a pacifier jammed in there. I had several friends who let their children have delayed pacifier usage and it was so frustrating to me. 

DS2 has sensory issues (as well as a speech disorder) so he chews on things a lot. Everything really, and his shirt will sometimes be soaked with spit because he has been chewing on the neckline. I'm sure people are judging me for that, and that is okay with me. His occupational therapist recommended chewies for him when he was about 18mo. 

This gives him an appropriate outlet for his chewing. These worked great for around the house, but I have 3 kids and they were always getting misplaced. I recently got the chewies on strings so he can have them when we're out and about. I really, really love these!

Again, I'm sure we probably get some judgement when we are out in public and he is using these, but I know what they are for, and that they are appropriate for his issues, and I teach him to take them out of his mouth when he is speaking to someone.

TL;DR: I highly recommend chewies to anyone who has a child with chewing/oral stuff going on.

sdtchica13

lizabethann06 said:

lizabethann06 said:

Why is the dog not for public view? I'm seriously so confused right now. It's like this whole other world of parenting opened up just at this moment.

Mister Bear comes everywhere with us. He was even in family pictures a few weeks ago. Jack's just a kid!

Right! I mean, right?

I'm so confused. Until this very moment, I never knew there were people who took away blankies from their little ones or didn't let their young kids bring stuffed animals out in public. I learn something new everyday. I wish I hadn't lol.

Soooo....basically, you are judging those parents who don't allow their kids to bring stuffed animals out in public?  )

Hahahaha Not quite! I just think kids should be kids, we shouldn't force them to grow up so fast and I definitely don't agree with taking away things that comfort them and are totally normal and healthy for them to have. But I totally understand why you don't want Bingo out in public, you want him to be around for her to sleep with and that won't happen if he's in pieces from too many washings. We have two identical Mister Bears but only one is approved by Jack for use because the other one is " pretend " and " not the same." ( Threenagers. Actually he's four, can I call him Fourtween? ) If anything happens to the " real " Mister Bear - well I can't even think about the drama and trauma that will occur.

H, bingo has been washed so many times that I forget what he looked like new. In January we realized my nephew had one too that has never been used and we were like, "ohhhhh, that's what bingo used to look like", lol! I also have a drama queen, so I don't want to risk a dead bingo...one night about a year and a half ago, Corri woke up crying because bingo's seam opened and he had a hole...I have never seen her so distressed before! I had to sew him immediately so she could go back to sleep, lol!

blairwitch

I also put paci and blankies/stuffed friends in different catagories.  I guess I have associated a paci with a bottle, something that goes away around a year of age.  Neither of my girls took to them, despite my best efforts.  And I wouldnt change my opinion on them if they did take one.  

As for other lovies...Nikita has a bunny.   That was her everything up until probably a year ago.  It has been loved and washed to the point it is almost beyond repair.   She knows this and thats when she started to leave bunny in bed more often.  She has 2 other identical ones but they just arent the same  

R314159

BetsyD2010 said:

I hope all you binkie and blankie takers end up with thumb suckers.

I have a thumb sucker. (
My LO took a pacifier for about the first month and then he refused and only sucked his thumb. I have tried numerous times to get him to switch back to the pacifier but he only wants his thumb!