How to politely decline "advice".

feliciaw86

My best friend is pregnant too. I've been planning this pregnancy for over a year, done research like crazy, read baby books etc. Hers was a total surprise, found out a week before I did that she's two months along, but feels the need to give advice that I already know about. I've tried telling her I'm fully prepared, but she's not getting it. How to I nicely say shut up?

Jessie333

You have to learn to master the smile and nod.

firefly1231

i grappled with this one too, and as pp said, still do.  My favorite go-to "well, every baby is different so we're trying to stay open-minded about our options".  that shuts everyone up  

BankerBSN

I usually say "Oh!  Let me write that down!" and pretend to write on my palm.  But then again, I'm a snarky beotch.

vintagejjane

Like PP said, this is just the beginning! I usually just did the smile and nod and "Oh okay". It used to really bother me especially when I was pregnant, but you get used to it. Most of the time people think they are trying to help you. Then you get the other people who are just idiots.

nesenotes

I just nod and smile. Unless it's a really stupid comment and then they get a side eye.

ZAP12

I just took it and then decided whether I wanted to follow their advice or not. There's really no way to get them to stop without being confrontational. Just say thank you and then decide for yourself.

LadyRoarsome

If only there was a way to actually stop people from giving advice. Just shake your head, nod, and say thank you.

Lynzdice21

My best friend who has a 2 year old has been pissing me off! 

"You can't have coffee because if you have a miscarriage you'll blame yourself"

"I hope you like rootes because you cant dye your hair"

"You're really going to travel to Mexico next month while pregnant?"

DOES MY FUCKING LIFE NEED TO END BECAUSE THERE IS A BABY GROWING IN ME!?!

UHG! Ok so I get the coffee thing, my Dr did say I could have one cup a day, but the way she said it totally pissed me off. 

We didn't tell our parents yet but my MIL is the passive aggressive "oh are you sure you want to do that?" type... cant wait!!!!!!

hthomas17

"Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the F#%! you were gonna do anyway."

Winter2166

My sister had a baby 6 months ago and my family is always giving unsolicited advice. I am trying to find the nicest way to get them to stop before I tell them I'm prego.

brittandjp

I respond one of two ways, "Okay, thanks!" and nod. OR "Well actually,____." complete with my disagreeing statement. It depends on who's giving the advice and the content.

feliciaw86

She told me not to buy What to Expect WhenYoure Expecting because her Dr. gave her a copy at her appointment, I told her I bought it two months ago when we started TTC, and said "oh, the doctor won't see you before 8 weeks" before I even called for an appointment. She actually asked if I had insurance... I've been planning this over a year!! I just want to be like, shut up! I know more than you!