Hi ladies. You give some great advice on here, so I'd like your advice on a tough situation I'm in. Sorry if this is long, but I want to make sure I give all the facts.
I belong to an organization of women. Another younger woman in the group, let's call her Dana, is currently pregnant as well, due one week before me. My best friend in the group, let's call her Erin (and another woman outside of the group) offered to host me a baby shower on a particular Saturday this summer. After their offer, Dana asked if she could host me a shower. We are not as close and the guests would have been the same for both showers, so I thanked her but declined and said she could get in touch with Erin if she liked to see if she needed any help. Erin said she told her what weekend it was, but said that she thought they had everything covered.
A couple weeks later, I conversationally asked Dana if she had a shower planned (so I could mark the weekend in my calendar.) I did not ask to host or help host. She responded by saying another woman in our group, let's call her Susan, had just offered to host her a shower. That was pretty much the end of the conversation. My friend Erin was at an event with Dana and Susan where I was not present right after this conversation. Dana and Susan again asked Erin when my shower was planned for. She told them the date, and Dana responded by telling Susan her shower must be before that, since she was due first. She then asked Susan to host her shower the weekend directly before mine. Susan asked Erin why my shower was so early (two months before my due date.) Erin responded that our other friend who is co-hosting is getting married and going on her honeymoon and that was the only weekend she was available, in addition to mentioning that it was best to have showers a little on the early side just in case. I was upset when I heard about Dana's insistence that her shower be the weekend directly before mine (especially since our guest lists will include most of the same women and it was mentioned that my shower was "too early" - remember that Dana is due only a week before me) but decided to let it go.
At an event last night, Dana stopped me and said, "Susan needs help with my shower. She said she can't do the cake and food. You can do the food. Get with her." I was shocked. First of all, I never asked to host or help host her shower. Secondly, I was still upset that she had insisted her shower be the weekend before mine. I didn't know what to say, so I asked when the shower was, and she told me it was the weekend before mine. I mentioned that I had already committed to another event that morning, so I hoped I could still make the shower. I didn't respond to the comment about making the food. I stewed over it last night, and then today sent a text to Susan and Dana: "Hey girls, I was thinking about something and just wanted to ask you: Since our guest lists will essentially be the same, do you think it may be a little inconvenient for our guests to have our showers two Saturdays in a row?" Neither woman has responded.
What would you do?
Edited: typo
Re: Dueling Baby Showers?
A word about deleting, though, you can't delete the thread. You can delete the title, and you can delete your responses, but if they were quoted (in a blue box in someone else's response to you) then whatever you said will stay. Since you've already been quoted, it's probably best to leave it and hope it gets buried.
If you delete and replace the title with something like 'Delete/d" or "." it's going to drive twice the amount of traffic to the thread because people are going to think something major went down. It's called a Dirty Delete, and people really don't like it.
Me-31, H-27
**Loss 1-Cycle 7(June 2013) at 5w6d-CP**Loss 2-Cycle 11(October 2013) at 5w4d-CP**
**Loss 3-Cycle 14 (January-February 2014)-M/C dx 2/10, EP dx 2/24, MTX 2/25**
Beta Hell--hCG finally down to 0 - 6/20/14
SA normal. Genetic testing normal. Hormonal testing normal.
HSG 6/30/14 - found blocked left tube and 2 'bubbles' on uterine wall.
Hysteroscopy/Lap--8/4/14 - Tubes unblocked. Polyps removed from uterine wall. Septum removed.
9/30/14--Off the bench! Unmedicated TI through December 2014
BFP 12/14/14!!! Beta #1, 12/16: 990 Beta #2, 12/18: Over 2000! Beta #3, 12/22: over 8000!
U/S #1, 12/23: gestational sac, possible heartbeat
U/S #2, 12/30: HEARTBEAT! 128bpm, measuring right on at 7w EDD: 8/19/2015
U/S #3, 1/9: BPM in the 180s, IT'S HAPPENING!!!