I'm due early July with our first child & I've always known that there'd be a possibility of two showers for me (one in my home state with my family/friends and then one in my current city with dh's family). My mother has already offered to host a shower for me in May, so I've already bought plain tickets and everything.
Now nobody in dh family has formally offered to throw me a shower (I was prepared for this happening & I am ok with not having a shower if nobody offers). But lately family members have asked either me or dh if someone is already throwing me a shower. There was even one family memer who asked "are we supposed to throw her a shower?" as if bc I am family they are obligated to throw me one.
Me & dh family have not always seen eye-to-eye or gotten along, but I try to be the bigger person & know that I would not say no to anyone offering.
My question is how do I respond if one more person asks me if someone is already throwing me a shower. I know that I can politely respond with "no nobody has offered", but do I follow it up with your more than welcome to if you like? I have this feeling that some of them feel obligated to throw me one & I'm not really ok being at a shower that was only thrown bc they don't want to look bad.