July 2014 Moms

NBR: This doesn't go anywhere but I have to share-UPDATE 2

Salsera29Salsera29 member
edited March 2014 in July 2014 Moms
Here is the latest installment in the chronicles of "Salsera Works In An Asylum."

Except it's not that funny. Someone, and we don't know who, is shitting on the floor in the girls bathroom and smearing it on the walls. It has now happened 3 times. Once it was also found on the stairwell railings. This time the person wrote "Xoxo" on the wall in shit. From what I know about behavior disorders, this is a very, very bad sign. Like dead pets come next. I'm pretty freaked out that this disturbed child is one of my students and we don't know who it is! We had one student we knew was psychotic but he was put on home instruction pending placement laat week. So we really have no idea.

Update: Well it happened again today and they are pretty sure they know who it is. It's the girl I suspected right away because she has shown other signs of sexual abuse  or other major issues. Her teacher is a good friend of mine and I have told her more than once, "There is something WRONG with her. Her behavior is not normal." It happened at the end of the day today so I'm not sure what action is going to be taken. I'll find out tomorrow.

I'm stressed out about what to do. We have a guidance counselor, a school psychologist, and a principal who should all know better than me what the next step should be. But I have a feeling that next step isn't going to be what I think it should be. I don't want to step on any toes but I may have to follow my gut and do what I believe is right. (Sorry for being slightly vague. As some of you pointed out I don't want to share any details that could cause a problem).

Last Update: The guidance counselor and the principal talked to the girl this morning. Her guardians were contacted and some sort of help has been offered to them. Her teacher assures me that, "It wasn't what we thought" (meaning somehow they have determined that it's not due to abuse). So, at this point I have to leave it in the hands of the people with all the information. It seems like they have done or are doing whatever they can. I'm not being vague this time, this is all the information I have. Thanks everyone for your advice, and cross your fingers that she does get whatever help she needs. 


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Re: NBR: This doesn't go anywhere but I have to share-UPDATE 2

  • :-S

     

    Creepy! 

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  • Yikes. And yuck.

  • January BrideJanuary Bride member
    edited February 2014
    That is really concerning. And disgusting.
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  • What a shitty situation! (Get it?) but really: super creepy - do kids get to go to the bathroom without supervision or asking? I can't remember what we did in school maybe we had to get a pass .. What do they do there? I'm concerned I can't remember anything from school ... Where is my brain!
    Lol at "shitty situation" Well played :-) Kids do have to ask, and every girl who was sent to the bathroom in a certain time period was questioned. All that produced was something about pink Jordans being seen...but I don't think they got anything further than that.


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  • Just...whoa.
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  • We had this problem in one school I taught in. We were supposed to make sure students never went to the bathroom alone to try to stop it. I don't remember if he or she was caught. Yuck!!!

      
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  • We have had this happen relatively frequently where I work. Yay for public libraries!
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  • This happened every year at the school I taught it. So. Gross.
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  • That is so disgusting... in other news, you may someday be interviewed by reporters and get to say "But she SEEMED so normal..." Y'know, after all the corpses are found.

    The only bathroom issue I ever had to deal with as a teacher was a lesbian student who we eventually refused bathroom privileges to because she was repeatedly caught having sex with her girlfriend in a bathroom stall. She was only permitted to go between classes or if she had a teacher escort. Oh the joys of public education...
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  • edited February 2014
    that's extremely disturbing :/

    eta: ... especially the xoxo part.. that totally creeps me out
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  • I worked in group homes for youth and we were trained that this is often a sign of sexual abuse. It's referred to smearing and is an acting out behavior, a call for help. The other students may figure out who it is, or she may get caught and probably subconsciously wants to get caught. What age do you work with?
  • Salsera29Salsera29 member
    edited February 2014
    I worked in group homes for youth and we were trained that this is often a sign of sexual abuse. It's referred to smearing and is an acting out behavior, a call for help. The other students may figure out who it is, or she may get caught and probably subconsciously wants to get caught. What age do you work with?
    Oohhh I didn't think about that...son if a bitch now I REALLY wish we knew who it was. My school is K-5, but the little ones have their own bathrooms in the classrooms so it's probably a 2nd-5th grader. 

    ETA: that would also make it harder to figure out who it is. We all know the students who are "off" but someone being sexually abused...that could be anyone. Oh god, that hurts my heart. 


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  • Oh I'm so happy to hear someone else had shit in their school. My room connected to the auditorium, while I wasn't shocked to find used condoms in the middle school, I was appalled to walk into (not me literally, although someone did), and pile of poop. I mean, I hope they brought TP with, because I can't imagine shitting somewhere and not wiping.

    Then I got attitude from the custodian, when I told her what happened. I would have been pissed, but don't shoot the messenger!
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  • Is there money for security cameras? Of course you can't put them in the bathrooms, but in the stairwell at least....
    Probably not, but it's definitely a good idea. The problem is it would take until the end of the school year to put in the requisition, get the funds approved, blah blah blah.


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  • Salsera29 said:
    I worked in group homes for youth and we were trained that this is often a sign of sexual abuse. It's referred to smearing and is an acting out behavior, a call for help. The other students may figure out who it is, or she may get caught and probably subconsciously wants to get caught. What age do you work with?
    Oohhh I didn't think about that...son if a bitch now I REALLY wish we knew who it was. My school is K-5, but the little ones have their own bathrooms in the classrooms so it's probably a 2nd-5th grader. 

    ETA: that would also make it harder to figure out who it is. We all know the students who are "off" but someone being sexually abused...that could be anyone. Oh god, that hurts my heart. 
    Ouch, yes so young.  I was thinking maybe middle school, but darn that's young.  I hate it regardless, and I hope I'm wrong.
  • I just asked my best friend who teaches 4th grade:


    Once or twice a year we have a smearer. Usually it's sexual abuse situation and dyfs is called.

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  • jensaviccijensavicci member
    edited February 2014
    And you're still working there because?.....lol

    Not only is that absolutely disgusting, it's creepy. Now...when you walk into a room one day and the kid is sitting in their poo smiling at you and singing some jolly ass song encouraging you to "come play with them", you'll wish you'd have gotten out sooner.

    :)

    ETA: but on a serious note, hopefully you find the kid and get them help.

    ETA2: aw I feel bad now.....didn't read the comments on sexual abuse til now :( that's really upsetting.
  • Oh that is disturbing and heartbreaking at the same time! :(

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  • Oh my god. Horrifying! I hope they can figure it out soon and get this kid some help...


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  • My friend said they do fingernail searches to narrow down the suspects. 
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  • Yikes! I hope they can find out who it is and get them some help.

    A kid in high school a million years ago did it. We all knew he was off, but it turns out he was really sick, and ended up institutionalized. My sis is a School Psychologist and has had kids with this issue, and they usually are hospitalized at least for a bit...

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  • There is one girl I'm thinking about...do you guys remember when I mentioned her teachers high-fiving when they guessed that she was being abused? It would make sense that they wouldn't have noticed if she came back from the bathroom smelling. I have no credentials and no right to do so but I want to talk to her myself.


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  • My friend said they do fingernail searches to narrow down the suspects. 
    Oh dear god. I try really hard not to notice student fingernails. Ewwwwwwww


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  • This is so sad. Bless all of you teachers for everything that you do to care for and teach our children. You are wonderful women (and men).
    Thank you so much. That is appreciated more than you know.


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  • I just asked my best friend who teaches 4th grade:









    Once or twice a year we have a smearer. Usually it's sexual abuse situation and dyfs is called.

    We had a fifth grader at my old school that would write cuss words on the bathroom wall with poop. It eventually got narrowed down through obsessive bathroom checks and monitoring times students went to the bathroom. It was also attributed to sexual abuse :( so sad.

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  • So heartbreaking. Keep us posted if you figure anything out.
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  • So heartbreaking. Keep us posted if you figure anything out.
    I definitely will.


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  • Salsera29 said:

    There is one girl I'm thinking about...do you guys remember when I mentioned her teachers high-fiving when they guessed that she was being abused? It would make sense that they wouldn't have noticed if she came back from the bathroom smelling. I have no credentials and no right to do so but I want to talk to her myself.

    I missed the post about the teachers high fiving about her abuse. But that's disgusting. Why? My mind is blown by that, it is just as bad to me. Please tell me you lost your mind on them. They were severely reprimanded or something. My heart aches for her, those are the kids that need teachers the most.

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  • Salsera29Salsera29 member
    edited February 2014
    There is one girl I'm thinking about...do you guys remember when I mentioned her teachers high-fiving when they guessed that she was being abused? It would make sense that they wouldn't have noticed if she came back from the bathroom smelling. I have no credentials and no right to do so but I want to talk to her myself.
    I missed the post about the teachers high fiving about her abuse. But that's disgusting. Why? My mind is blown by that, it is just as bad to me. Please tell me you lost your mind on them. They were severely reprimanded or something. My heart aches for her, those are the kids that need teachers the most.
    Unfortunately I didn't see it happen, the guidance counselor told me about it. They are both abusive to the students and I think our new principal is finally catching on. Anything I see, I document and try to diffuse. Unfortunately I'm just the music teacher so there's not much else I can do to protect those kids. Apparently a parent was threatening to jump one of them yesterday. I would have sold tickets.

    ETA: I can't let this go. Another one of their students is neglected and often comes to school smelling like cat pee. One day he was standing in the hall and another teacher asked him why he was out there with his bookbag...he said, "Mrs. ________ told me to stand out here because I smell." Do I even need to say anything else?


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  • I used to work inpatient psych and this would happen frequently, but with adults. Most of them were abused as well.

    I would think that if they are writing "XOXO" in poop, that they've figured out how to tell a joke or try to be funny. That would make me thinkg that it's on the older end of your 2nd-5th grade spectrum.

    I hope for the student's well being, you are able to figure out who it is.


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  • Salsera29 said:

    Salsera29 said:

    There is one girl I'm thinking about...do you guys remember when I mentioned her teachers high-fiving when they guessed that she was being abused? It would make sense that they wouldn't have noticed if she came back from the bathroom smelling. I have no credentials and no right to do so but I want to talk to her myself.

    I missed the post about the teachers high fiving about her abuse. But that's disgusting. Why? My mind is blown by that, it is just as bad to me. Please tell me you lost your mind on them. They were severely reprimanded or something. My heart aches for her, those are the kids that need teachers the most.

    Unfortunately I didn't see it happen, the guidance counselor told me about it. They are both abusive to the students and I think our new principal is finally catching on. Anything I see, I document and try to diffuse. Unfortunately I'm just the music teacher so there's not much else I can do to protect those kids.

    Apparently a parent was threatening to jump one of them yesterday. I would have sold tickets.




    ETA: I can't let this go. Another one of their students is neglected and often comes to school smelling like cat pee. One day he was standing in the hall and another teacher asked him why he was out there with his bookbag...he said, "Mrs. ________ told me to stand out here because I smell." Do I even need to say anything

    my jaw is still on the floor. I'm sorry that you have to work with such despicable people. That's disgusting. I hope at the very least they dint get their contracts renewed, but I hope they lose their licenses.
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  • That's terrible and very messed up especially since it's such young kids. I hope your school is able to narrow it down soon, keep us posted.
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