Who gets invited to the birthday party?

smg2302

I just got notified from the bump that DD's birthday is 10 weeks away.  I thought I had a leg up on planning, but apparently I don't.  I'm trying to write out the guest list, and don't know where to draw the line on invites.  It's starting to feel overwhelming in numbers.  Since I don't live in the same area as my or DH's family, I don't expect a lot of people will show up.  I'm starting to get the same anxiety issues that I had at baby shower time.  Will someone be offended if I don't invite?  If I do, is it gift grabby?  Long story short- who is going on your guest list?

Boo0512

It's hard to decide who gets invited IMO. We'll for sure invite our parents, siblings, nieces/nephews and our grandparents. However, I'm trying to decide if I'll invite our BFFs and a few of our neighbors that have kids.

If you are worried about sounding gift grabby you could always write, "your gift is your presence" On the invite. Some will want to get a gift anyway though.

smg2302

It will be at a house, just not our house.  Luckily my family and ILs get a long well,  but both sides are guilty if "well if you invite a, you have to invite b."  Maybe, rather than worrying about who to invite, I need to be thinking of how to respectfully tell both sets of parents how/why were keeping it small and your best friend from elementary school does not need to be on the guest list.

emmy236

Well our party is a little different. It's Memorial Day weekend and people are coming for the whole weekend. Not just because R is turning 1 but also DH is graduating. So a lot people from his side are coming to celebrate both events. I kind of left the people to invite up to my MIL. Her people will be staying in hotels with the exception of my SIL, her baby and dogs, they're with us (no one else seems to want to stay in a house with 2 babies under 1 and 5 dogs) ILs are also springing for most of the food and drinks which will just be easy things to throw on the grill and beer and soda. We're inviting our friends with kids here (4 families) and then whatever other family members want to make the trip. I'm thinking like 25 people max. I'm just going with the theme of controlled chaos. As long as everyone is fed and happy it will be fine.

ordinary1

We will be inviting both sides of the family and a couple friends of mine.

TrulyBlessed22

I'm no help here because Latinos tend to make a huge thing about 1st Birthdays lol (actually everything is almost always a big deal lol). Anyway, God willing we will have beautiful weather so we can keep it outside because we will be inviting lots of people. Good news is I plan on keeping it Low key for at least the next few Birthdays till maybe 5 lol

Shoegal36

I'm inviting immediate family and friends with kids. For us, it's more important to have our friends there who we see all the time than extended family. I was the same way with my wedding. My friends came before cousins and aunts that I see every 2 years at Christmas. But that just me, and how my family is.

TradeMama

We are inviting our parents and siblings from out of state, plus close friends who know C. It's mostly friends with kids, but also a few childless friends and older friends who always check up on him. It'll probably end up being about 35 people... 10 might show up (in addition to family).

We are doing a cookout for cinco de mayo.

nbatchen

Our amount invited is crazy! Like 70 people including couples kids and such. But we are having it back home and are only going to be there for a couple days. So it is the easiest way to see everyone. Though I am sure a lot won't come due to it being Memorial Day weekend.

blush64

With my first two I invited my grandparents and a few aunts and uncles and cousins as well asy siblings, their families and my parents. I have a large family so I did not invite everyone and no one was offended. We all get together at least several times a year anyway.

I have always been close to my family but everyone is busy so I wanted to keep it small and relaxed. I go back to work just after her birthday and I will already be upset, anxious amd scared about that.

For A we are keeping it small. I will invite my parents, siblings and their families, possibly one friend. Rough total 12-14 kids and 11-12 adults.

sundaesprinkles

I have the opposite problem. I'm struggling to think of people to invite. All I have on the list is the six grandparents (DH's parents are divorced and remarried.), my brother, his sister and her husband, two aunts and two cousins. All in all only about 14 people! I really think that will be it because I don't know who else to invite. DH has one good friend but we never were invited to their kids' birthdays. I have two good friends (one with a 3 year old) and I feel awkward inviting them too because the one with a kid never invited me to any birthday parties for her son. I don't want to appear gift grabby. I'm just a little sad it will be small. Especially since things are a little awkward between DH's mom and dad since they are divorced. It would be easier if we had more people to diffuse things.

LaxMOM44

whoever gives the best gifts...d'uh

snowgirl427

I just invite people I want there. I'm not one for family obligation past dh's siblings and my parents. I would say though that I'll only in ite people we are close to. I don't worry about appearing gift grabby. They all know just being there is more than enough.

Schell2013

We are going to be doing it at a camp ground. I am just doing close family and the friends we see on a regular basis. If I live in the same town and don't see them or have any contact with them in the last 6 months I won't be inviting them to DD's bday. I don't want to be gift grabby looking. And really if they haven't bothered to come see her in the last 6 months (unless they live far away obviously that's different) then they probably won't care if they aren't invited anyways right?!

Shoegal36

makeupgeek said:

I have the opposite problem. I'm struggling to think of people to invite. All I have on the list is the six grandparents (DH's parents are divorced and remarried.), my brother, his sister and her husband, two aunts and two cousins. All in all only about 14 people! I really think that will be it because I don't know who else to invite. DH has one good friend but we never were invited to their kids' birthdays. I have two good friends (one with a 3 year old) and I feel awkward inviting them too because the one with a kid never invited me to any birthday parties for her son. I don't want to appear gift grabby. I'm just a little sad it will be small. Especially since things are a little awkward between DH's mom and dad since they are divorced. It would be easier if we had more people to diffuse things.

Do you think you weren't invited to your friends' kids' parties because you didn't have children yourself? And maybe you'll be invited to the next one? We didn't get invited to kid's parties until LO was born and we've already been to a couple.

sundaesprinkles

Shoegal36 said:

makeupgeek said:

I have the opposite problem. I'm struggling to think of people to invite. All I have on the list is the six grandparents (DH's parents are divorced and remarried.), my brother, his sister and her husband, two aunts and two cousins. All in all only about 14 people! I really think that will be it because I don't know who else to invite. DH has one good friend but we never were invited to their kids' birthdays. I have two good friends (one with a 3 year old) and I feel awkward inviting them too because the one with a kid never invited me to any birthday parties for her son. I don't want to appear gift grabby. I'm just a little sad it will be small. Especially since things are a little awkward between DH's mom and dad since they are divorced. It would be easier if we had more people to diffuse things.

Do you think you weren't invited to your friends' kids' parties because you didn't have children yourself? And maybe you'll be invited to the next one? We didn't get invited to kid's parties until LO was born and we've already been to a couple.

I've thought of that but her DS turned 3 in December and we weren't invited to a party. But I'm pretty sure she does a small family party so that is probably why. It's not like she's having a huge party and not inviting us. It's not that I care if I'm invited to her parties or not, it's just that since she didn't invite me to hers I don't want to appear gift grabby if I invite her to ours. I still may invite her anyway. I'm still thinking about it.

mammie

We are doing 2 parties. The first one is for friends and their children about 20-25. The second is my family (my siblings and their children) about 20 people. We don't have a large enough space to have everyone at once. I will probably do one over lunch time and family over dinner time. If my some of my family is busy that day I may combine the 2 parties.