Could use some thoughts or opinions

loreeann86

Sorry this will be long...DD will be 13months on the first, she's still BF on demand and most of the time to sleep. She will not take BM from a bottle or her straw cup (that she loves). I can't get her to take more than a couple sips of almond milk in a whole day. She has only been watched twice before. Once when 3 months old my mom and grandma came to us and watched her so DH and I could to dinner (we live 5hrs away from friends/family). By the time they got to our house DD was already down for the night. Back then she didn't nurse to sleep, was on a schedule and when she went down for the night she didn't make a peep till morning 6-7am. The second time she was baby sat was again by my mom while we were home visiting and it was during the day for a couple hours. It's been 6 months since she's been with anyone else besides me or my husband (mainly me).

Some wives of men that my DH work with are wanting to get together Monday night for Mexican food and margaritas. They are pushing me to go. DH works that night won't be home till after 11pm. One of the wives said her husband would watch DD so I could go. It feels strange to me to leave DD with him..they don't have kids, he is a very nice guy, my DH really likes him, it's not that we think he's a creep or would hurt her... Maybe I'm just having a hard time with leaving her? I do worry that she'll be unhappy the whole time. My other thing is I'd be dropping her off at 630pm. I am trying so hard to get her on a schedule again. Tonight she went down just before 7 and hasn't woke (it's a little after 10pm now) so I feel like we are hopefully making progress. Should I not enjoy a couple hours out and say it's because I'm working on DD's bedtime routine? Or go for it and hope DD will not scream the whole time I'm gone? I've already answered this a billion times in my head that I shouldn't go. But I know I would have fun and I need to get out....what would you do?

Kara13360

I'm a SAHM as well. Also has only been watched twice by my mother and last time was last June. I would have a hard time with someone else watching my son even if it was my mom again because I fear he will cry the whole time as well. I think we probably worry too much about it. If whoever watches them knows to play with them and keep them distracted from the fact we are not there they will most likely be just fine. I say try it and go out. Just keep your phone close.

jjdillie

I would not leave my DS with a man I don't know, especially one who does not have kids. Personally, I would feel better leaving my LO with a woman I didn't know instead of a man. Do any of the wives have a babysitter they use?

ohiodoxiemama08

I 100% understand your hesitancy. It's a big deal to leave your child with someone, especially someone who isn't family, doesn't have kids and when you're trying to stick to a routine. I agree with PP, maybe ask if they can push it back after she goes to sleep, that way the babysitter would be there just in case she wakes up. If not I think I'd pass. I'm sure that this guy is perfectly fine but it seems like you'd be too worried about her and not able to relax enough to have a good time.

loreeann86

jjdillie said:

I would not leave my DS with a man I don't know, especially one who does not have kids. Personally, I would feel better leaving my LO with a woman I didn't know instead of a man. Do any of the wives have a babysitter they use?

We know him, my DH has been working closely with him for a little over a year now. His wife and I have gone to the park together a few times and he's come too. They love kids and want their own soon, he was good with her at the park. That's why I say we aren't concerned about him doing anything bad with her...I think it's mainly i'm worried about how she'll do. I definitely would not just leave her with any one, especially a man. The wives that are going out Monday either don't have kids or their husband will be home to watch them. 

loreeann86

Thank you for the push to go ladies, I needed that from other moms who have little ones & would understand. I'll ask if he can come to us so I can try and put her down before I go. I'm sure she would be much happier if she was in her environment and with her toys. I hope she sleeps all night if I get her down before going, if not i'll just cross my fingers that she'll be happy for him. The restaurant we're going to is only 10min away She ended up sleeping from 7pm to 8am last night, woke a few times whining with her stomach pain/gas but went back to sleep right away. So it was a good night for us.  

jjdillie

loreeann86 said:

jjdillie said:

I would not leave my DS with a man I don't know, especially one who does not have kids. Personally, I would feel better leaving my LO with a woman I didn't know instead of a man. Do any of the wives have a babysitter they use?

We know him, my DH has been working closely with him for a little over a year now. His wife and I have gone to the park together a few times and he's come too. They love kids and want their own soon, he was good with her at the park. That's why I say we aren't concerned about him doing anything bad with her...I think it's mainly i'm worried about how she'll do. I definitely would not just leave her with any one, especially a man. The wives that are going out Monday either don't have kids or their husband will be home to watch them. 

In that case, I would probably go.  Like others suggested, I would try to put her down before leaving. If she doesn't go to sleep before you leave, she'll be fine. I'm a single mom and I had to leave DS with his dad for a few hours a couple of weekends ago for the first time. It was harder for me than for DS. He fussed for a minute when I left but he was fine while I was gone. We all need a break sometimes. If you trust the guy, then go enjoy yourself.

Hollylb3

If he would come to you, I'd do it. Otherwise, I'd try to find someone reputable to come to you. A friend's sitter or someone.

loreeann86

Thank you guys! He said he'll come to our house and watch her I am actually excited to go out now, I'm not feeling as stressed about it