I am very excited my mother is Willing to plan and throw a baby shower for me and my first child. I am due in September 2014 and am a very low maintenance person. My mom moved to a new home and really ants to throw the shower in her backyard. She has a nice backyard, but not much privacy, not to mention she lets her dog go everywhere in the yard. I am not opposed to having the shower in her backyard, it's just the timing of it all. She wants to throw a BBQ at the end of July, which is notorious for high heat and humidity. I run hot as it is, even before my pregnancy and I am nervous I will be extremely uncomfortable and nauseatingly hot in the backyard at that time of year since I will have a lot of extra baby weight. I am also nervous about the weather, what if it rains? I politely told my mom that was a nice idea, but I think my guests and I would be more comfortable in AC and advised about the potential for rain. She went on to say she has two EZ up tents which will protect us from the sun, but I I don't think 2 10x10 tents are going to do the trick unfortunately. When I went on to question the possibility of rain, she said we could have the shower inner garage..... I went on to advise that I am more than willing to pay for the hall rental at a VFW or K of C, but she refused and advised her backyard is the perfect spot for the shower that she' ll be throwing me... Is it just me? I am wrong? Please help!
It does sound like it would be uncomfortable. You can either suck it up and attend or politely decline the shower.
Thanks Ladies, I think the thing that bothers me most is she has a hall rental location basically in her backyard, so why is she so opposed to having it there? I even offered to pay the $125 rental fee if that is the issue. Again I'm not too fancy it's just a polish club, but would feel better if it rained, etc..
Will her home be available too so people can step inside if they get too hot ? I guess I don't see what the big deal is because people have 4th of July BBQs outside all the time, but I understand you will be pregnant and uncomfortable so that is also something she needs to consider.
Could you have a compromise ? Perhaps everyone eats and plays games outside, but you open gifts inside ? Did you say this is her new home ? Do you think that is part of it ? Part of her wants to show off her new home, but she also doesn't want people eating inside to cut down on accidents and ruining her new carpet ?
Her home is very small and shares it with roommates, so I don't believe the shower being held inside,even for gifts, would be an option... So that is why she stated if it rained it could be held in the garage :S.. I don't want to be difficult, but feel like it may be a thing of showing off her new home more so than for my benefit as awful as that sounds..
I have a feeling this is more about her new home too. It's not an awful thing to do. I know my mom threw my sister's graduation party partly because she wanted to show off her new kitchen.
Just like with any party thrown in your honor, if you think it won't work for you, there is nothing wrong with declining.
I've attended plenty of outdoor showers in July, even when pregnant. It can be uncomfortable, yes, but it's not intolerable. If your mother has already refused your offer to help relocate to an indoor location, you might want to suggest other possible solutions- like purchasing an additional tent and some fans. Or, plan something earlier in the day like a brunch or later in the evening like a cocktail party shower, when it's not at the peak temperatures of the day.
I've attended plenty of outdoor showers in July, even when pregnant. It can be uncomfortable, yes, but it's not intolerable. If your mother has already refused your offer to help relocate to an indoor location, you might want to suggest other possible solutions- like purchasing an additional tent and some fans. Or, plan something earlier in the day like a brunch or later in the evening like a cocktail party shower, when it's not at the peak temperatures of the day.
If she's still unwilling, you need to decline.
That depends on where you live. I live in the deep south but was raised in the north. I basically was not allowed outside during the summer when I was pregnant. Just getting the mail was miserable. There was no way I could attend an outdoor event.
I've been to weddings in late July outside and.... well, let's just say that I understand where you're coming from. especially for the fact that there won't really be anywhere for people to go if they hot and need to cool down.
Decline. Tell your mom that you appreciate her offer, but you're simply too concerned about the heat/weather and both your comfort and the comfort of the guests. Don't over explain it past that. Just stick to the fact that you feel it will be too uncomfortable.
I've attended plenty of outdoor showers in July, even when pregnant. It can be uncomfortable, yes, but it's not intolerable. If your mother has already refused your offer to help relocate to an indoor location, you might want to suggest other possible solutions- like purchasing an additional tent and some fans. Or, plan something earlier in the day like a brunch or later in the evening like a cocktail party shower, when it's not at the peak temperatures of the day.
If she's still unwilling, you need to decline.
You've obviously never been to AZ in July, LOL. There's no way an outdoor party would be acceptable unless it involved a pool, and even then, there has to be an indoor respite.
But even if it might be only 'uncomfortable', I would still be firm about it being indoors. Perhaps say "Mom, I'm so grateful that you've offered to host a shower for me. However, I am absolutely not comfortable with it being outdoors, for myself and the other guests, so we need to find another venue. As I mentioned, I'm willing to pay the rental hall fee, but if this isn't what you had in mind, then I will understand if you choose not to host the shower."
I'm in the Midwest and there is no way in hell I would want to be outside in the middle of July. DD was a July baby, and this upcoming baby will be July too - it's just extra miserable pregnant in that weather.
I would decline the shower. Even non-pregnant folks would be miserable outside.
"Your truth is different from my truth, and we're both right."
TTC since March 2013. BFP 4/13/13, blighted ovum discovered 6/6/13, m/c 6/8/13.
Envy1328
member
Re: Butting Heads on Baby Shower
It does sound like it would be uncomfortable. You can either suck it up and attend or politely decline the shower.
I've been to weddings in late July outside and.... well, let's just say that I understand where you're coming from. especially for the fact that there won't really be anywhere for people to go if they hot and need to cool down.
Decline. Tell your mom that you appreciate her offer, but you're simply too concerned about the heat/weather and both your comfort and the comfort of the guests. Don't over explain it past that. Just stick to the fact that you feel it will be too uncomfortable.
I'm in the Midwest and there is no way in hell I would want to be outside in the middle of July. DD was a July baby, and this upcoming baby will be July too - it's just extra miserable pregnant in that weather.
I would decline the shower. Even non-pregnant folks would be miserable outside.
"Your truth is different from my truth, and we're both right."
TTC since March 2013. BFP 4/13/13, blighted ovum discovered 6/6/13, m/c 6/8/13.
BFP 11/10/13, EDD 7/25/13 - stick little owlet!