Baby Showers

LittIePenguin

When do you think the ideal time is to have a baby shower? I see women doing it as early as 4 months and as late as 9 months.

I'm 3 months now, but I want to start planning my baby shower so I dont wait until last minute and all the halls are booked for the wedding season.

When should I plan it? Suggestions.. ?

Thanks!

LyndseylovesHugh

You shouldn't plan it, the mother-to-be should never plan her own shower. A shower is a gift giving event and it is tacky to throw one for yourself.

mcgeeva

I agree. Don't plan your own shower. Tacky. If someone offers great!

LittIePenguin

That really didn't answer my question at all, but OK! I don't have any sisters or brothers or close friends that can plan my shower. My older cousin is helping me plan it, but I want things my way, not their way, so i'm involved in a lot of the decision making, which I like. The last thing I want is to walk into my own shower and be disappointed. So quite frankly, I don't care if you think its tacky or not, LOL.

mcgeeva

Wow..that's all I can say. You sound like a peach.

LittIePenguin

Thank you

LittIePenguin

I love the fact that everyone has their own opinion yet no one actually answers the question that this thread is even about! Both of you just sound real stuck up, sorry. Some people dont have the luxury of having someone else throw their baby showers.

LyndseylovesHugh

If no one offers you a shower then you don't get one. It is a gift, not a right. As for your original question, what does it matter what we think? You are going to do what ever you want anyways so why don't you just throw your shower when ever you want?

LyndseylovesHugh

Maybe you should ask this question on the Baby Showers board, you will get more responses there.

LittIePenguin

I swear, some of the women or should I say girls on this board are a real joke. Every pregnant woman is entitled to a baby shower to ring in the blessing of a new baby. You gals seem like your living in the 50's where it was mandatory to have someone plan your shower. Everyone is dealing with their own issues in life and like I said some don't have that luxury of close friends, moms, sisters to do that for them, THAT SHOULDN'T MEAN THAT THEY AREN'T ENTITLED TO HAVING A BABY SHOWER. That's a ridiculous thing to say.

mcgeeva

There is a difference between needs and expectations. And by your post..you should know what stuck up is. Most people don't have their shower until closer to 6-8 months. If you have these high expectations you should know now that most people don't even shop off your registry. So you may want to buy things that you need for you child yourself.

LyndseylovesHugh said:

Maybe you should ask this question on the Baby Showers board, you will get more responses there.

Yes please! I was tempted to repost to the baby shower board as a joke. You know how they love to answer these types of post And coming from someone who had to pay to get pregnant both times around..I surely understand what it means to pay for a child and provide for my own kid so sorry I don't feel bad no one wants to throw a snotty ass bratt a shower

LittIePenguin

I dont expect anyone to buy me anything I cant afford or give to my baby. I already bought all the major necessities. That is NOT the reason I want a baby shower. I am not trying to MILK my friends & family, I just want to have a gathering of love ones to celebrate this blessing.

LyndseylovesHugh

LittIePenguin said:

I swear, some of the women or should I say girls on this board are a real joke. Every pregnant woman is entitled to a baby shower to ring in the blessing of a new baby. You gals seem like your living in the 50's where it was mandatory to have someone plan your shower. Everyone is dealing with their own issues in life and like I said some don't have that luxury of close friends, moms, sisters to do that for them, THAT SHOULDN'T MEAN THAT THEY AREN'T ENTITLED TO HAVING A BABY SHOWER. That's a ridiculous thing to say.

Saying that you are entitled to a shower is the ridiculous thing. If you don't have any close friends then who do you expect to show up to this super special shower you are entitled to?

LittIePenguin

Idani said:

LittIePenguin said:

I swear, some of the women or should I say girls on this board are a real joke. Every pregnant woman is entitled to a baby shower to ring in the blessing of a new baby. You gals seem like your living in the 50's where it was mandatory to have someone plan your shower. Everyone is dealing with their own issues in life and like I said some don't have that luxury of close friends, moms, sisters to do that for them, THAT SHOULDN'T MEAN THAT THEY AREN'T ENTITLED TO HAVING A BABY SHOWER. That's a ridiculous thing to say.

Did you ever stop to think perhaps you have no one to throw you a shower because of how you behave and act?  No one is ENTITLED to shit.  It isn't the 50's but basic manners that prove what you are doing and acting like it tacky. 

You're comical, I must say. Thanks for the laugh hun, I needed it.

LittIePenguin

You clearly used a word that is not appropriate on a baby forum. Do yo teach your kids that language too?

LyndseylovesHugh

LittIePenguin said:

I dont expect anyone to buy me anything I cant afford or give to my baby. I already bought all the major necessities. That is NOT the reason I want a baby shower. I am not trying to MILK my friends & family, I just want to have a gathering of love ones to celebrate this blessing.

Then have a meet the baby party after he/she is here, or invited your friends over for a dinner party. You can celebrate without throwing yourself a shower. A shower is a gift giving event, it is tacky to throw a party for yourself where gifts are expected. You can celebrate and not make your loved ones feel like they have to buy you something. Chances are some will still bring you a gift but it won't be expected.

LittIePenguin

LyndseylovesHugh said:

I dont expect anyone to buy me anything I cant afford or give to my baby. I already bought all the major necessities. That is NOT the reason I want a baby shower. I am not trying to MILK my friends & family, I just want to have a gathering of love ones to celebrate this blessing.

Then have a meet the baby party after he/she is here, or invited your friends over for a dinner party. You can celebrate without throwing yourself a shower. A shower is a gift giving event, it is tacky to throw a party for yourself where gifts are expected. You can celebrate and not make your loved ones feel like they have to buy you something. Chances are some will still bring you a gift but it won't be expected.

Thank you! This is the first real worthy answer I've gotten so far. I will look into that instead. Sorry for being snippy before but I was honestly asking for opinions, not to be criticized. 

Meery82

OP, quit acting like an entitled ass. No wonder no one wants to throw you a shower. Yuck. You are not entitled to a baby shower. If no one throws you one, you don't get one. It's a gift. Buy your own shit. No one is answering your question because you aren't supposed to throw your own shower. And quit flagging people just because you don't like what they have to say. Cursing is not a flaggable offense. Get over yourself.

Mizoo

Wow!  OP you are acting like an entitled brat.  I agree with Meery82, no wonder no one wants to throw you a shower!

Meery82

Meery82 said:

OP, quit acting like an entitled ass. No wonder no one wants to throw you a shower. Yuck. You are not entitled to a baby shower. If no one throws you one, you don't get one. It's a gift. Buy your own shit. No one is answering your question because you aren't supposed to throw your own shower. And quit flagging people just because you don't like what they have to say. Cursing is not a flaggable offense. Get over yourself.

@littlepenguin, apparently you can't read. Nothing I said is flaggable. Go review the TOS and follow it or you will be banned. And remove the flag. Ugh.

graciesmurf

Hi OP,

You sound like the type of person who likes to be in control of all the details... nothing wrong with that.  I think you should focus your attention on throwing a meet the baby party after your LO is born.  That way, you can have say over everything and not be disappointed.

tealowl

LittIePenguin said:

That really didn't answer my question at all, but OK! I don't have any sisters or brothers or close friends that can plan my shower. My older cousin is helping me plan it, but I want things my way, not their way, so i'm involved in a lot of the decision making, which I like. The last thing I want is to walk into my own shower and be disappointed. So quite frankly, I don't care if you think its tacky or not, LOL.

OH GOD THE TRAGEDY OF THAT.

noragerman86

I don't think planning a shower is the same as throwing your own. You only get one so it should be what you want. I'm letting my mom and mil and aunts throw it and send out invites but I'm still telling them what games and prizes I want and what decorations I want . I've dreamed of this my whole life so I want it a certain way. They were going to throw it anyways and this way they have all the ideas and where to get things handed to them. They are still the ones inviting people and "running" the shower. I don't think it's tacky to want what you want. It's your and your babies day! I'm doing mine at 7 months.

toddbaby

Asking a question & expecting an as swear is one thing. Bashing her bc you don't agree with her is different.

TikiTurtle

LittIePenguin said:

You clearly used a word that is not appropriate on a baby forum. Do yo teach your kids that language too?

It's a forum for grown women, not babies. Should we not use words like sex? Penis? VAGINA!?!?! I'm sorry, but if your delicate little lady ears can't handle "shit" then you won't like it here.

Ps: twatwaffle. Just for the fun of it.

Tassie06

I'm not hormonal so I'll answer your question. Lol. A baby shower is usually thrown up to 2 months before baby. Although, not ideal for you to throw your own shower. You're right. It's not the 50s. Why not wait until after baby?. Do a meet and greet maybe 3 weeks later.

Gigi8212

JFC OP. You're acting like a real dick. Your cousin wants to throw you a shower. Let her plan it as a gift to you. That is what a shower is!! A GIFT.

You should never, ever throw your own gift giving event. But OP obviously knows that, so we can all say it until we're blue in the face but in the end she is going to throw herself one tacky ass shower.

LyndseylovesHugh

Tassie06 said:

I'm not hormonal so I'll answer your question. Lol. A baby shower is usually thrown up to 2 months before baby. Although, not ideal for you to throw your own shower. You're right. It's not the 50s. Why not wait until after baby?. Do a meet and greet maybe 3 weeks later.

Pregnant or not I know that throwing your own gift giving party is tacky. "Hormones" have nothing to do with that, common sense does.

MamaLlama14

Tassie06 said:

I'm not hormonal so I'll answer your question. Lol. A baby shower is usually thrown up to 2 months before baby. Although, not ideal for you to throw your own shower. You're right. It's not the 50s. Why not wait until after baby?. Do a meet and greet maybe 3 weeks later.

Coming for the show from the Baby Shower board! First, to address the quote above: Erm, when did having common sense and tact while telling the honest truth equate to being hormonal? I swear, women who blame things on pregnancy hormones and perpetuate the stereotype really piss me off.

Now, onto @babypenguinwantseverythingandwantsitnow whatshername: GROW UP.  A shower is NOT a celebration of a baby that isn't even born yet; it's a welcoming to motherhood for a new parent and is thrown FOR you as a gift from someone else.  If no one has offered, then guess what? You're not ENTITLED to anything.  I strongly suggest taking the advice of PP regarding a little self-reflection: maybe there's a reason no one has offered to throw you a shower yet! And- gasp!- it might not even be your bratty attitude.  It might just be the fact that you're BARELY pregnant yet and most people wait a bit on these things.

LoveIsAll25

I agree with PP's, you shouldn't throw yourself a baby shower. I am sure no one has offered because you are only 12 weeks pregnant. I don't know about your friends and family, but mines didn't start bringing up the word 'baby shower' until a few weeks ago, and I am 24 weeks pregnant.   Everyone knows baby shower = gifts.  If it's not about the gifts then have a BBQ and when people ask about your baby registry say you already have everything you need.

yvanehtnioj

OP I was able to see through the haze of brattiness & defensiveness and will actually offer some advice: if you aren't interested in gifts and want to put it all together yourself, I think what you want is a meet n greet/sip n see/whatever they call that stuff to celebrate the baby. Those are not showers, they take place after the baby is born (and therefore truly celebrate the baby and not just the mother), and planning one for yourself is not considered tacky at all.

noragerman86

I've been dreaming of how it would look. There are themes on Pinterest for a reason. If no one had preferences everyone would have the exact same shower. Get a life people. Talk about lack of support for fellow moms and preggos, it's silly that this site even exists if people are going to be that rude. Opinions are fine but I thought everyone was an adult here and respect is common sense.

MamaLlama14

noragerman86 said:

I've been dreaming of how it would look. There are themes on Pinterest for a reason. If no one had preferences everyone would have the exact same shower. Get a life people. Talk about lack of support for fellow moms and preggos, it's silly that this site even exists if people are going to be that rude. Opinions are fine but I thought everyone was an adult here and respect is common sense.

@noragerman86 I just realized where I know you from! I loved you in this movie.  Can I get your autograph?

Cranang

Cran was here. Just wanted to stop in and express my support for people with manners.

OP, you're a real piece of work.

naturaloaklandmama

I have to say I agree that throwing your own shower is not proper etiquette but I am shocked to hear how viciously people are attacking those who are interested in throwing their own shower. This level of judgment is absurd to me. Who cares if they want to throw their own shower? If you disagree, then just enjoy your own shower (or lack thereof if circumstances result in no one throwing you one) and leave other moms to do whatever they want. She didn't come here for advice on whether it was appropriate to throw her own shower. She came here merely to ask about timing for when a shower is generally given. Taking it on this vicious tangent is frankly confusing to me. 

yeah.

LittIePenguin said:

You clearly used a word that is not appropriate on a baby forum. Do yo teach your kids that language too?

Did you flag her for saying shit? That's amazing.