Need your advice ladies

KJKNAJ

Today I found out that my 8w2d baby was measuring correctly but had no heartbeat. Where I need your advice is that the OB left it to me to decide between waiting for a natural miscarriage or scheduling a D&C. He then went on to say a bunch of informative stuff but I wasn't really listening because I was still reeling from the bad news.

So, obviously none of you can tell me what I should do here, but, help! Your experiences? Your suggestions? I'm thinking I need to make this decision quickly?

aschultz9

With no signs of bleeding happening yet I would do a D&C. With everything measuring just right I would want one more US to confirm first though.

Kalidawn523

When I thought I still had a choice I had planned on doing the D&C. They are done so frequently now that the risk of scarring is so low. And they generally put you under conscious sedation so it isn't as risky as full anesthesia. The other ways (ie natural or meds) just seemed like they could drag on and be incredibly painful. My natural this weekend was really painful but did go better than I had thought. However this is an incredibly personal choice. I didn't really want to deal with the pain and mess and wanted to get it over with so I could move on and that was my reasoning for wanting the D&C. If you feel like you may want that experience to help you grieve that's ok too. It sounds like your body isn't aware of the loss yet tho so you may need meds to get you started if you want to avoid a surgical procedure. I'm so sorry you have to worry about this. I'm praying for guidance for you and for healing through whatever method you choose. ❤️

ironman2010

So sorry to hear about your loss!  I just experienced my 2nd m/c in October at 7w3d. We went in for a normal scan and was told there was no longer a heartbeat.  I too was asked whether I wanted to pass naturally or have a D&C.  It's sort of a hard time to make decisions like that right away so I decided to wait for a bit before scheduling anything.  I did decide to pass it naturally because I didn't want to go under general anaesthesia and natural seemed best for me.   It took two weeks (which is very normal) to start bleeding.  Two days after bleeding I did pass the embryo.  The cramps were painful and almost felt like labour the day it passed.  I actually felt the need to push right before it came out.  It was definitely not a pleasant experience but for me and my husband it was easier to say goodbye that way.  Sorry if this is a bit graphic but I always find hearing the truth more helpful.  If you think it will be too hard to go through that or to actually see it then I would suggest having the D&C.  I don't regret passing naturally but I'm not sure if I was ever much further along that I would go natural again.   I had a tiny piece of tissue left inside afterwards that was too small to have removed. As they said it would , it came out with my first period and it was finally all over.  I hope this helps in some way.  There is nothing wrong with waiting a bit so try not to stress yourself with the decision process.  Please take care of yourself. Hugs!   

TGager

I started bleeding and miscarrying the night before my D&C and they found that the baby & placenta hadn't passed, so I ended up with a D&C anyways. I had to go to the ER because I was bleeding so much that my blood pressure dropped and my iron was low. I felt so much better after the D&C was done. I have a lot of admiration for the women that can do it naturally, especially after the 6 hours that I tried.

Sorry you are going through this and hope that no matter what you chose it goes smoothly.

dawnstar898

I had a D&C my first time and will have one again this time.  I had considered going natural this time but they want to test the "products of conception" for chromosomal abnormalities and the only way to do that is with the D&C, which I'm fine with.  My hesitation was because of the cost, even with my insurance, but the hospital lets me make payments and there's no interest or time limit, so what's another 1000$ I guess!