Breastfed baby does not nap

murderbot

My 4 week old eats constantly. This is today's log: 7:30 am 3 oz of pumped breast milk, 8:45 - 9:25 nursed both sides, 10:08-10:36 nursed both sides, 11:32-11:58 nursed both sides, 12:43-12:59 on right side. FINALLY NAPPED for 50 minutes. So that means between 7:30 am and 1 pm he was awake except for falling asleep for 5 to 10 minutes between switching breasts. Then 2:37 - 4:10 pm nursed both sides. He's awake between every one of the nursing sessions. At night he does make 2.5-3 hour stretches. When my husband comes home he will give him a bottle of breast milk or formula, because I have no time to pump he'll probably get formula, then last night he nursed from 6:20-9:30 with two 20 minute breaks. Right now he's waking up from the cat nap he has in between breasts and rooting and acting hungry. I'm miserable. I hate breastfeeding. I want to eat or go to the bathroom. I cry as I'm feeding him. I have really bad thoughts. I want my husband to come home and just leave him with him. And I feel bad that my husband works so hard to help me when he's here. I'm having second thoughts about posting this even though it's to a bunch of internet strangers. A baby this young should sleep more, right? This has been going on for about a week. Before that I was exclusively pumping and it was a little better. My lactation consultant got him to latch on again and I thought it would be so much better but it's actually a million times worse.

DreamDisney

Oh god cue crazy lady that's going to tell you how your child should be sleeping.....

(Nothing against you OP) 8-}

murderbot

I'm meeting with the lac consultant again Thursday if the roads clear by then. I'm going to discuss everything with her but I don't know if I can wait that long. I've had issues with depression in the past and know I should try to talk to someone about it, I just don't have the courage to talk to someone about it yet. It's hard to explain. Like I don't want to admit defeat. I feel like I should be smart enough to figure this out on my own. Plus my doctor seriously retired after my baby was born. I was literally her last patient. I don't want to talk to a complete stranger. (Even though I'm doing it now I guess). I'm scared he's not developing correctly since he's not sleeping. If it's a growth spurt should it last almost 5 days? I will ask the bf board too. Thank you for your input.

laynal

My child has been cluster feeding a lot lately too. I feed her on both breasts when she does it. Basically, when it seems like she's just kinda relaxing at my breast which is normally after the thirty minute mark, I unlatch her, burp or change her and if she's still hungry I move her to the other breast. Totally normal for them to have some days of long eating/wake periods.
Don't feel ashamed to admit you need help. Is there anyone you can talk to to at least get your feelings off your chest? Your hubby, mom, or a friend? This parent thing is new and it's not always an easy transition.

mwhipple77

I can't help with the constant feeding, but I think you do need to talk to someone. Having a baby can be very frustrating at times. I was very open with my husband, although I never had any symptoms of PPD. Many moms get it, there is nothing to be ashamed of, especially if you have a history of depression.

Are you completely against formula? Could you possibly try to supplement for a feeding or two a day to save your sanity?

Try to find time to yourself when your husband is home. Take a hot bath, get out of the house alone, go get dinner, anything to make you feel like your old self.

PrimRoseMama

MosyMama said:

Everything you posted sounds in the normal range for a 4 week old. But I agree with PPs that it sounds like you really need support right now. There's nothing at all wrong with asking for help...lord knows we all need it at some point, especially in the beginning.

Agree. This all sounds normal. Frustrating? Yes.
Exhausting? Yes.

Big hugs, babies gonna baby.

taraleanne

Well mama, all of this sounds normal for a BF baby...  I agree with alot of the pp advice. Try and find some YOU time when hubby is home, get involved in a mama's group, leave a bottle and go run an errand, take baby for a car ride immediately after a breastfeed (babies sleep in the car!), invest in a good baby carrier and wear your baby, they sleep then too. 

Cluster feeding and not sleeping is very normal during growth spurts and in babies this young. 

Look up the wonder weeks (app on a smart phone or check website or there's also a book) as it explains growth spurts known as leaps and will help you to understand what's going on with your baby.  

Your hormones are still running wild, your feelings are normal, your baby's nursing behaviour is normal. We know it's hard but I PROMISE it will get better and this won't last forever.  Also keep meeting with your lactation consultant to make sure the latch is good. 

My other advice is to stop recording every nursing session and just follow your baby's cues for hunger and sleep. If you are reading various books on baby sleep stop reading them and just snuggle your baby. I say this because I was once this mama and as soon as I stopped doing those things I was alot more comfortable in my own FTM shoes. And finally, seek support from anyone you can- a relative, a friend, whoever. If you feel anxiety and might be at risk for post partum depression, talk to your doctor or public health nurse immediately.

Hang in there mama, what's going on right now will not last forever. All the best.

edit for spelling.

onenewmama

I recently went from EPing to BFing and am noticing similar issues with LO eating a lot more frequently and sleeping a bit less. I agree there are things about BFing that are harder than pumping. I definitely feel less in control without knowing how much LO is eating and with having to feed him so much more often. I am trying to remember that this is kind of like starting BF all over, so there will be a few days/weeks that are rough as we work it out, but in the long run, it will be freeing not having to be tied to the pump and washing bottles, pump parts, etc. So, I am hoping we get a routine soon and I that I will feel more confident that BFing is working out. For me, it's really hard to be confident in it working since there were such issues in the beginning. We have been at it for almost a week now (LO is 8 weeks old and we had to EP from about 2.5 to about 7 weeks) and it is starting to get easier every day. Definitely a work in progress, though. I just wanted to let you know you are not alone in the EP to BF challenge.

I also agree with PPs that you should let your husband help out with giving a bottle of BM or formula for a few feeds a day--sometimes that small break makes me feel a million times better!

SharonB222

I would bet its transitional. I've learned to give things at least a week (unless an emergency). Perhaps you were on a pumping schedule and now LO is establishing his schedule (the bbs "remember"). Perhaps LO is cluster feeding in advance of some of those stretches. My LO fed 2 hrs around the clock up until 6w; now twice a day he is cluster feeding every hour for 4 hrs and then will have a 3-4 hr stretch. I keep thinking he's having a growth spurt but the stretch makes me think he's tanking up and defining a schedule - "make more milk at this time of day please". With DD, when I went back to work she reversed cycled which was more demanding initially (a week or two). Hang in there! Call you LC again if it would help.

Littlemama01

Yikes, sounds rough!! I would like to add that sometimes babies deal with gas pains but rooting and acting hungry...maybe after a full two boob feed you could try some gas drops and give it a few minutes. Also my LO won't lay flat after feeding but will sleep if I prop him up. I usually use the boppy pillow. Definitely call a dr, they are only a stranger for the first visit, you need to start somewhere!!! And I agree with @mosymama, you can put the baby down for a while, even fussing, and get some lunch or bathroom time. They will live!!

RondackHiker

Lurking, but I'm worried about you.

How are you? You can go to the ER if you need to.

waittilltomorrow

I agree about the wind. My lo makes feeding signs like rooting, sucking hands etc when she has gas. Have you tried propping up the cot at one end? A couple of old phone books great for this. This helped my reflux baby. If you are struggling with breast feeding, how do you feel about mixed feeing? When I started to struggle with feeding I would sometimes give the baby formula. It didn't hurt the baby but it improved my sanity enormously. Is there a mothers group you can join in your local area for support as well?