Unsolicited belly rubs *rant*

Kander320

Gotta love the holidays and being the first pregnant one in this huge family of my husbands. My MIL doesn't seem to be able to read my body language whenever she reaches out and pets me. Ugh.

It even got so bad that I was overly sensitive to it and slapped my husbands hand when he went to touch it. It's the first time he even tried so I think I hurt his feelings but I couldn't take it anymore.

My family understands I have a bubble and don't seem to even try and touch my belly (which isn't even big yet BTW)

Yay for another 5 months....

RachelCA29

I totally get you!

As soon as my husband's grandma and aunt saw me on Christmas Day they went right for my bump, and didn't even say hello/acknowledge me first! It's like I am no longer a person, but a carrier for a touchable bump. And I really don't like people touching my stomach; my mom asked my on Christmas Eve and I let my whole family know I would not be open for belly touching. Ever.

I personally think it is a very intimate thing. It's a thing for my and my husband to touch. I think it's something we created, and we get to grow and cherish, and I want to keep it to just him and I.

So after his aunt went at me like I was a Buddha statue, I politely announced to everyone that I was not comfortable with people, even family, touching my bump. His aunt pretended she didn't hear me (she was like, "well no one was trying to grab your butt", as if I had said "bum") and then when I clarified, she didn't talk to me for a couple of hours! It's like I get no opinion over how public my own body is because I'm pregnant with his family's first grandchild/great grandchild.

You have every right to set your own boundaries! THEY are in the wrong/rude if they ignore them.

usernewname

I know what you mean! When I went home my mom started touching and I moved away. I wish I was closer to my mom but that was too much in my bubble.

getitdone

My argument is - if you didn't put it there - then don't touch it. That being said, I did let my mom, my Granny who is 92, and DH's Granny who is 90 touch it when I saw them at Christmas. Outside of those rare occasions, no one else but DH and I should be touching it.

RachelCA29

getitdone said:

My argument is - if you didn't put it there - then don't touch it. That being said, I did let my mom, my Granny who is 92, and DH's Granny who is 90 touch it when I saw them at Christmas. Outside of those rare occasions, no one else but DH and I should be touching it.

That is EXACTLY what I told my family! (I was more polite when telling my husband's family. lol.)

kristine526

I thought I would be an "OMG don't touch my belly!!!" person, but it surprisingly doesn't seem to bother me. Granted it has just been people I know, and it'll probably bother me when strangers do it, but it's not too bad... yet.

jjtyler

I wasn't pregnant during the holidays and also took forever to show a bump when I was pregnant the first time, but I definitely envision someone getting knocked out in the New Year...

WTF with people feeling like they can rub your belly OR WORSE, put their head close to it and TALK to it...that shit is reserved for my sister (and I still think it's weird), hubby, and dd...

jschwind22

This happened to me for the first time on Saturday night.  I suppose it was what I get for being the pregnant one in a bar, but it was highly obnoxious.  Why do strangers think this is ok?  I'm sure they wouldn't like it if I rubbed back.  Maybe that should be my strategy...

mmks

For any stranger or non-immediate family member, my strategy is to rub their stomach too!
Why do people do this anyway??? I've never wanted to touch someone's preg belly just because. My BFF let me feel her baby moving when she was pregs and that was so neat, but I never would have touched the bump otherwise!

RedInLove

I haven't had a stranger touch me yet, and I pity the fool that does so, especially if DH is there.

SMIL touched quickly today, I didn't mind too much. My 8yo niece patted it and said 'Bye, Baby!' when we parted ways today, that was adorable.

typeset

I rub them back. 

Miles2Go

Unsolicited belly rub = unsolicited boob grab. Fair is fair.

theoryofwhat

Miles2Go said:

Unsolicited belly rub = unsolicited boob grab. Fair is fair.

I've tried everything but this to no avail. Looks like I'll be grabbing some boobs.

Bootsie327

It doesn't bother me to have friends and family touch, and 9/10 times they ask first. I can't deal with randoms thinking pregnant bodies are public domain, though. Luckily this hasn't happened yet, but I'm sure once I'm bigger, there is sure to be SOME ballsy stranger with grabby hands coming my way that I have to shut down.

alphalyrae

I don't worry about being 'rude' don't fucking touch me and you won't have to hear me tell you not to touch me. If I can see it coming, I head it off by putting my own hand on my stomach as a guard. Otherwise, they get an earful as loud as I can possibly make it to embarrass them. I'm not ashamed for telling you not to touch my body.

salehsmith

This is my hubby's solution for me

sheriot

My family went at me like I was the star of a petting zoo. Luckily one of my aunts loudly asked if I minded and I just said, "Not at all, I am just going to rub your tummy, too. Fair is fair." Another aunt joked that she had a holiday food baby, but no one touched it after that.

If I had a stranger touch me I'd give them a "You Dirty Creeper" face and walk away because, like any normal human, I sure as shit don't want to touch a stranger.

@salehsmith I love the tshirt.