**UPDATE**:mixed feelings day...sadness winning out

mmhopeful

Today is finally CD1.  I called in and have a plan to start Lupron on December 26th.  (This made me happy....I'm moving forward.)

Today, my husband's work place gave out information that they are changing insurance plans.  I will be in the middle of this 2nd IVF round and once January 1st comes, I need to wait for an approval of my plan through the new insurance to continue with the process.  It could take up to 15 work days to approve.  The insurance company is who I need to wait on. 

I cried so hard right after talking with the finance person and then the IVF nurse.  We have come so far, gotten kicked down by circumstances and now it looks like we could be down for the count.  My coverage runs out on my b-day in early February.  Turning 40 has a whole new level of upset to it.  I really felt so helpless and hopeless all at once.  My husband was with me this afternoon and I was inconsolable.  My hopes are on hold right now.  We are trying to petition for a new ID number from the new insurance ASAP as we need coverage in order to continue.  Then, there is this reality check going on in my head that reminds me.....you may be able to move forward, but you need to remember the following:  1. Your methotrexate injection impacts everything....this will be a LONG Lupron protocol to get as far into January as we can.  2. There are no guarantees that you will have viable embryos 3. If they transfer 2 or 3, who is to say one will even work?  and 4.  The chances of another ectopic pregnancy are high because it's happened before.

I'm in the middle of report cards and my car had to be serviced today.  When it rains, it pours.  Trying to keep it together one more day so I can cry all weekend if I need to.  Just feeling so defeated.

 

***UPDATE***:  My husband and I drafted a letter and it will be submitted to the new insurance company to explain why we need our ID cards expedited.  HOPING this helps us.  I then got a package in the mail yesterday from a 3TC sock exchange program I was participating in.  It made my day a little better.    My report cards also got handed in to my principal and I made it to the weekend.  Thank you everyone for your support.  So trying to take things one step at a time, but I was officially at "the pity party" on Thursday.  This IF journey could never have been predicted.  Thank goodness I have all of you here.

kz's_girlygirl

Ugh! It definitely seems like there are always so many things working against us. I am so sorry you are dealing with so much insurance BS. I hope they give you the ID number ASAP so you can at least have that sorted out.

One breath at a time, one foot in front of another and, hopefully, day by day closer to your take home baby. Be gentle with yourself this weekend

LSN8308

im sorry you're having such a bad day. i know that sometimes you just need to go through the motions and sulk and cry and get angry. i hope that you feel better soon and are able to take things on one at a time and FX things all work out *hugs*

LilSip0611

It really does all seem to come at once and I'm so sorry you have to deal with insurance on top of everything else you have been through. Take it one day at a time and be good to yourself. Big hugs to you!

Margritli

I am so sorry, @mmhopeful. "The good thing about life is that it comes one day at a time." Big hugs to you! When I have a really tough day ahead of me or even a tough morning, I always look at the clock and tell myself, "In nine hours, this will be over." It helps me get through days that seem never-ending. I hope Friday afternoon comes soon for you!

RunCC37

Oh my... That is way too much stress for one person to bear. I'm sending you my thoughts and prayers and hope this works itself out.