Baby shower at a restaurant?

SouthRNComfort

A couple of family members have suggested hosting my shower at a restaurant. Is it crazy for me to suggest that it just be at someone's home? My reasoning: Restaurant showers feel do stuffy, stuck in one chair, harder to mingle, I had two wedding showers where only half the guest list showed up so I'm having scary flashbacks of wasted food and money, A few of my fiends that would attend have toddlers, and I want them to be able to bring them and just don't know if a restaurant shower will be kid friendly, I have a tiny suspicion said family members will ask my husband for money to foot the restaurant bill, so having it at someone's home would be less expensive Thoughts?

RibbitGrl930

One important thing I want to point out: do not assume that your hosts will be able to accommodate your friends' toddlers. As much as you would like them to be able to bring them, your hosts may not be able to afford or may just not want children to be there for personal reasons. So I would suggest letting that go as a reason for not wanting it at a festaurant.

As for your other concerns, I'm in agreement that I am not crazy about the idea of a restaurant shower. Having people at separate tables rather than being able to circulate and mingle sounds a bit impersonal to me...but then again, I've never been to one, so I'm sure it could be perfectly lovely. Oh, and as for your relatives asking DH to help foot the bill? Just say "Hells no." Parents to be should neve, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever pay for anything in regards to their shower. It makes them de facto hosts for their own gift-giving event, which is gross.

If you are truly uncomfortable with the idea of a restaurant shower, I would just bring it up once. Mention that you think having it at someone's home may he cheaper, you'd rather be able to mingle a bit more intimately with your guests, etc. If they insist on having it at a shower, then drop it. Either accept it the way it is, or decline if you're that uncomfortable with it.

RebeccaY1

There isn't much that you can do about where the shower is held.  My mother talked about having the shower in a restaurant, but after looking into the cost decided that having it at home would be better.  She decided that no children would invited because she didn't want to plan activities for them, have to babysit them, and worry about them breaking items in her home.  

EastCoastBride

In my group, showers have always been at someone's home.  But for my baby shower, my hosts were talking about doing it at a restaurant.  This "bothered" me only in that I was concerned about cost.  I REALLY didn't want this to cost them a lot of $$.

My one friend said to me basically what estwd said - the idea of not having to clean a home, set-up, make all the food, and then break it all down was VERY appealing to them.  It was actually worth it to spend the $$ to them.

Past that - they reserved a private area.  We had two long tables set up.  I moved between the two tables and talked to everyone, a few other people mingled, and the gift opening area was set up "between" the tables. 

I felt it worked out very well. 

Sit back and let your hosts plan what works best for them.  And I agree- it's their call if kids are invited or not.  Honestly- the idea of toddlers at a shower makes me cringe.  Toddlers LOVE to get into the fray and can be a big distraction.  If it's MY toddler or the toddler of a good friend, I might think it's "cute" - but if I don't know the kid, I find it annoying.

Disneygeek77

Estwd2 said:

I love restaurant showers because there's so much easier to plan. Very little set up or decor needed, and all of the food is prepared for you. As a hostess, I totally get the appeal of that and I wouldn't oppose their choice for that reason. However, your husband should in no way shape or form pay for that shower. That would essentially be like you throwing yourselves a shower. So if they ask, your husband should definitely refuse. If they can't afford it, that might eliminate the restaurant option right there.

I agree with this.  Absolutely refuse to pay for a restaurant shower.  Doing so might make it a non issue.

Oh and make sure that they don't foot the bill to the guests either.  The guests are already taking time out of their day to celebrate you becoming a mother and bringing you a gift.  They shouldn't have to pay for their food on top of that.

SouthRNComfort

Thanks for all the feedback. I'll have to have hubby practice saying no if they ask him to pay.

daisy662

I have been to a ton of showers both baby and bridal - easily over 50 over the years and I think 3 of them have been at someone's house. All have been at restaurants, country clubs, halls, banquet facilities, etc. a lot of these types of places have private rooms so you still have that intimate feel. I have never been to one where it was within the general public and I think that would be bad. A lot of them will make up menus for your group or do a buffet so you have a more fixed price than ordering anything off the menu. Logistically, it makes the planning so easy! I prefer them this way.but,agree with pp's that you or your DH should not pay for it yourself. If that happens, you should decline. Good luck!

dufferoo

Just curious, who is hosting the shower and how are they going to ask your husband to pay? Just call him up and be like "Yo, can we get some money?"? Seems so outrageous!

linzerd

Mine is going to be at a restaurant. But it has a separate room where we all will be. I also attended a friend's bridal shower once at a restaurant, same deal, separate room away from the rest of the patrons.

bossyfnp

Ive been to two baby showers held at restaurants in private rooms. One was banquet style, one had 2-3 menu choices that guest could choose from. Both went along smoothly, but i think banquet style is best. Mine will be held in a private banquet room, with appetizers being served banquet style