No baby shower?

maryomelia

Hi ladies. I'm a first timer with a baby boy on the way. I don't expect to have a baby shower seeing as all my friends and family are spread out across the country and have no real base where I'm located. Is it still acceptable to create a registry and expect people to buy me gifts? How would I go about "spreading the word" without sounding like I'm just asking people to give me gifts? Thanks for any advice!

notreal2

Make a regustry, because you get completion coupons for your own purchases. If people want to buy something for you off of a registry, they will ask, otherwise, there is no polite way to disseminate that information.

mcgeeva

LalaMama81 said:

It's never acceptable to expect people to buy you gifts or to share registry information unsolicited.

 You never know if you will get a shower or not who knows. I would still create a registry b/c 1. you will get a discount on those items later and 2. some people might ask you for it. 

This exactly

ddembinska

Create a registry.

No way of knowing if somebody will throw you a shower.

SO's family lives 500 miles away, but insisted on hosting a shower. We are going there in January for it.

spano41

Creating a registry is also a good way to organize your thoughts as to what you are going to need.  I'm sure some people will send you gifts unsolicited and some people might even ask if you have a registry.  I think it would be fine to tell your close family members (mom, sisters, etc) about the registry so they can spread the word if people ask them. 

PrimRoseMama

You can create a registry. There is a completion coupon.

IMHO, it is not acceptable to "spread the word" or expect gifts. If someone wants to get you a gift they will.

shaunessa

I couldn't attend one of my girlfriend's shower b/c she lived 7 hrs away and I had to work.  Having a registry definitely helped me pick out items she wanted as opposed to me just guessing and buying.  

If people ask if you're having a shower, just say no.  THEN if they offer to buy you something mention your registry.  But don't say "I'm not having a shower, but you can buy me a gift @ ___".

Disneygeek77

Only mention the registry if asked.

zou bisou

maryomelia said:

Hi ladies. I'm a first timer with a baby boy on the way. I don't expect to have a baby shower seeing as all my friends and family are spread out across the country and have no real base where I'm located. Is it still acceptable to create a registry and expect people to buy me gifts? How would I go about "spreading the word" without sounding like I'm just asking people to give me gifts? Thanks for any advice!

You see the paradox between the red and green statements? 

I recommend you plan on buying your own baby stuff.

mandilou221

This was my experience with DS's baby shower:
My family (in Cleveland, OH) had a baby shower without us where they would show everyone what they bought and basically had a wrapping party. My grandparents brought all the gifts with them when they came for a visit shortly after Luke's birth.

My friends (locally in northern Mississippi) tried to have a surprise baby shower for me, but it wasn't a surprise. Still nice. 

We traveled to the Mississippi coast to have a planned shower with my husband's family.

Apparently we made out like bandits.

I think if you tell a few people about your registry, maybe share that you feel weird publicly announcing it, they will spread the word for you.

HobokensFury

Expecting/ asking for gifts is never proper.  You can set up a registry and tell people about it only if they ask you about it.

GreenleeMalon

Not only do I use it as a checklist (because the mental list was getting too long) but my mom is throwing my baby shower and she said she is going to let people know where my registry's are if they would like to buy something. I am not expecting anything out of anyone for my baby shower.

GreenleeMalon

All of my family is spread out as well...

michellersayer

We created a registry for our baby shower and we also had family spread out that asked if we were registered anywhere.. If people ask first then I told them.. I never just expected them to buy anything though.

Luckie519

I am with others about creating the registry, due to the completion coupon.  Also, if a good friend or coworker of mine is having a baby, I get them something regardless if they have a shower or not.  This is my second, so I will not be having a shower, although several friends and coworkers have asked me what I need or would like.  If they get me something, cool, if not, no big deal.  I personally don't think it's okay to just throw out you have a registry, unless something asks if you need something.  Then maybe it would be ok to mention you made one and see if they ask where, etc.

crystalmir91385

You never know what will happen. My best friend lives 1000 miles away and still invited me to her shower for her first baby. I didn't go but, I still bought her a gift.

Giraffealaff

I would still create a registry, but I wouldn't "expect" anything from anyone. If people want to provide you and LO with gifts, they will inquire as to where you are registered at which time it would be acceptable to let them know. But if they don't ask, you should not make it a point to go around and inform everyone. That can seem gift grubby and greedy, which is honestly, what your OP sounds like...

If anything just make a registry based on the stuff you know you want and won't mind buying yourself if need be, the bonus are great and super helpful when on a budget.

Nicole Zook

I found that i used the registry to organize my thoughts about what i needed but also to get price comparisons. We dont have a lot of money and so im trying to get good deals on some used stuff. and the best way to know if your getting a good deal is to know what it costs new.

sheila27

Do the registry! Your family can buy the gifts online and you can pick them at your local store!