Open-letter Tuesday

ziggy903

Dear baby,
Please show me your junk today. I brought juice boxes to work to drink before my appt to get you dancing. Sorry, not sorry.
Love, mom

Dear abdominal region,
Please be normal. I did not enjoy my digestional issues yesterday and I am not enjoying the pain I'm fairly sure is RLP today. Get your act together.
Love, body

OutOfStep81

Dear Ziggy's LO,

Cooperate for your mama please!

-Fellow GA bumpie

 

Dear Little Girl in My Belly,

Midnight is not the time to start a dance party. I love feeling you move, but 12-1am is not the time for it.

Love- Your super sleepy mama

rebecca4980

Dear boss,
Please take the stick out of your ass and realize that my family comes first.  I know I've taken off a lot of sick time lately, but what do you want me to do?  If I'm sick, I'm sick.  If my child is sick, I stay home.  Telling me I need to find "an alternative care" for him is bs.  If DS has a seizure and ends up in the hospital with a double ear infection, sure as shit I'm going to leave him with someone else.  Get the sarcasm?  And if I get fired over this, it won't end well.  For you.  And thanks for not responding to my email regarding his hospital stay.  Least you could have done was said "hope he gets better soon."  Like any good person would. 

Sincerely,
Your worker who will find it so satisfying to quit after LO gets here. 

DS,
Please get better so mommy won't worry about you.  Seeing your lips turn blue was super scary. 

Love,
your adoring momma

mamacrunch

Dear new medicine,

I am so happy to have you, but the nausea and jittery feeling is not appreciated. Please go away. 

Thanks, Amber.
***********************
Dear Son, 
 Thank you for being awesome today! I love you.
You are my favorite person ever.

Love, Mama
***********************

Dear Husband,

I hate COD!

Love, your wife.

becausemom

Dear Jacob,
Please stop kicking Mommy's belly button. It hurts.
Watching it pop in and out,
Mommy

Dear Jay,
Please watch where you pee in the mornings. I'm tired of cleaning the wall behind the toilet. I don't fit into the space back there anymore.
With love,
Mommy

Dear courier,
Please stop staring at my belly. You come to have me sign for things, and refuse to look at my face. You have a daughter. A round belly shouldn't be a foreign concept to you.
Annoyed,
The pregnant chick you see EVERYDAY

rebecca4980

Beachbumm2214 said:

rebecca4980 said:

Dear boss,
Please take the stick out of your ass and realize that my family comes first.  I know I've taken off a lot of sick time lately, but what do you want me to do?  If I'm sick, I'm sick.  If my child is sick, I stay home.  Telling me I need to find "an alternative care" for him is bs.  If DS has a seizure and ends up in the hospital with a double ear infection, sure as shit I'm going to leave him with someone else.  Get the sarcasm?  And if I get fired over this, it won't end well.  For you.  And thanks for not responding to my email regarding his hospital stay.  Least you could have done was said "hope he gets better soon."  Like any good person would. 

Sincerely,
Your worker who will find it so satisfying to quit after LO gets here. 

DS,
Please get better so mommy won't worry about you.  Seeing your lips turn blue was super scary. 

Love,
your adoring momma

Praying for you and your DS! Sounds scary... And I can't wait to quit after my LO is born either!

Thanks.  It was super scary.  Poor boy has been through too many tests and sicknesses lately. 

WookieesCookies

Dear work,

Let's be kind to each other these last few weeks. I would like to end it on a good note. I'm so glad that our relationship is coming to an end.

Love,
Your bitch

Beachmommy1029

Dear cervix and contractions, I need you both to calm down and just stay put, if not get better. This surprise bedrest has pretty much scared the shit out of me. Let all just get along, okay? Love, Nervous Mommy. Dear SO, while I'm glad you're going to California to see your friends, I am slightly jealous that I am confined to the couch while you frolic around eating delicious foods and exploring. I wanna play too! Love, my new SO is Hulu.

Mazingmommyof6

Dear LO,

Thank you for growing big enough and strong enough for mommy to finally feel you! It's about time!

Love,

your stressed out mommy


Edit spelling

Noethola

Dear baby Zig, 

I echo pretty much all of Feb14 and your mama. We love that you are very modest, but just this one time could you just show enough for the tech to tell your mama if Harmony was right or wrong?

Love, 

Your Feb14 family

Dear construction workers, 

Please remove the port-a-potty you put in our front yard, as I have asked you to. While we would love to list the house with an extra 1/2 bath, I doubt that is really the type buyers are looking for. Please move it by the showing this weekend. Please!

Cheers!

-Trying to sell the house

Akrani

OutOfStep81 said:

Dear Ziggy's LO,

Cooperate for your mama please!

-Fellow GA bumpie

 

Dear Little Girl in My Belly,

Midnight is not the time to start a dance party. I love feeling you move, but 12-1am is not the time for it.

Love- Your super sleepy mama

ziggy903OutOfStep81rebecca4980 Hope your son gets better soon & that your boss gets that stick out of his/her ass! 

Dear fellow CTA riders,

As the numerous posted signs say, please give up your seats for elderly, handicapped & pregnant women. If one more person pushes past me to get on the train, shoves me aside to grab an open seat or uses my body as something to hang onto as we're whipping around corners, I will have to verbally berate you in front of the other passengers. Don't poke mama bear. 

Sincerely,

The clearly pregnant woman who is just trying to make it to & from work safely 

dbr018

Dear Glucose Test,

PLEASE don't fail today.

Love, I don't want to give up ice cream

Codypup

Dear Wiggles,

 I'm pretty sure that you're the reason my stomach is acting like I just scarfed down 14 bean burritos. I'm happy you're growing and all, but this being-up-all-night thing is getting kind of old. Are you having a party in there? Are you bored? 

Love, Mom 

Dear H, I'm sorry I blew up the bathroom this morning, and then forgot to turn on the fan or open the window. 

 Love, Codypup

(Edited for format)

mabjcb19

Dear Ziggy's LO, please spread your legs, just for today!

Dear back pain, go away, you are cramping my style.

Dear work, I believe the above issue would be solved if you forked out the cash for some new desk chairs to replace the one I am currently using that is over 10 years old.

Dear LO, I am truly enjoying the dance show you put on for me but please stop getting stage fright when Daddy comes over to feel, he's getting left out and bummed.

KazDuck918

Dear Life,

     Is it seriously only Tuesday? I really need a day to sleep in. Please speed up just a tad so it's Saturday again.

Thanks,

Walking Zombie

djtippietoes

Dear anterior placenta,
I don't like you. I want to feel movement already.
Love,
Me

cattuccino

Dear baby Ziggy, 
Cooperate for mama today. We're excited for an update! You're also not coming across as one of those cooperative babies and might be giving Mama Ziggy a run for her money when you arrive...let's let her catch a break before the real fun begins, yes?

Love, 
A Fellow Bumbie

Dear Co-Worker, 
I understand it was cute and romantic for your BF to spontaneously buy you plane tickets so you can go visit him in Vancouver, and I know long distance royally sucks. But your trip means I have to move (and maybe even cancel) my babymoon. Because we both can't be gone at the same time, and some part of me is sympathetic to your long distance relationship and the sweet surprise and plane tickets are hard to refund. 
But it still royally sucks and upsets me, and I wanted my baby moon during that time, 
Your boss, 
who is awesome, 

you better realize it. 

Dear LO, 
You are amazing. I love your kicks and wiggles. 
Keep it up. 
I love you to the moon and back already. 
Love, 
Momma

boogerbearoriginal

Dear Self:

Please stop worrying about LOs, both will be ok, you're a good Mom.

Signed,

Crazy lady who can't stop her brain from going to scary places.

Amyjoy1972

Dear stomach
I have enough gas to go from va to ca. Please let me feel normal.

Waterschild

Dear 3d Ultrasound tech,

Thank you for doing a half ass job during my ultrasound. Your bedside manner leaves A LOT to be desired, and I'm extremely glad you are confident enough in your gender confirmation that you think its ok to raise your voice at me. I sure did appreciate you stating, 'it's a girl' in a stern 'don't question me' tone. Especially after stating my baby was too small to see anything, yet within seconds of the ultrasound you declared the sex. The whole experience with you made me feel SOOOO warm and fuzzy inside.

Thanks for that, and the fact that I am questioning if I am carrying a girl. Guess I'll have to wait and see.

Sincerly, a pissed momma of a possible girl...

BioGirl21

Dear bangs:

Stop growing so fast! You were cut 2 weeks ago and now you're an inch longer? WTF

 

Dear H's job:

Thank you for not being huge dicks like H thought you would be and putting the OT that was missed on this paycheck onto his next one. While the 12 hours OT would be nice now, the next check should be nice!

cbear47

Dear Ziglet-
Please give your mama a break and show your stuff! (She's a special lady, but shouldn't always be the exception to the rule!)
-Feb. 14

Co-workers-
We work in the food service industry. It is wrong for you to come to work with "that awful virus" going around. Yes, I'm pregnant. That has nothing to do with my reaction to you being sick!!! And management staff, if you don't start sending these sick people home, I'll report you to cooperate office!!!!
-Tired of avoiding co-workers

Dear Neighbor-
We moved into our house in May. We introduced ourselves to the neighborhood then. You didn't come to our housewarming BBQ.
Lucky is a (almost) 2yr old, 95lb, Great Dane/Lab mix. He is a big dog. We haven't worked out all of his bad habits, but we've only had him since the last week of May. He is so much better than he was and is almost "ideal" on a leash.
Our very first interaction as neighbors should NOT be you telling me I wasn't allowed to walk my dog past your house because "it scares your family." Lucky hasn't EVER used your yard. You see me walk past your house to go to the park, and walk back holding a BIG bag of poop. You see us (me or my DH) walk past three times a day.
When you are not home, your kids actually pet my dog. They are NOT scared of him.
I will NOT change my path and walk my dog on the busy street. I'm sorry you are scared of dogs, but please don't blame me for your fears. And if you ever want to get over your fear, my derp of a dog and I will be here.
-your "bitch" of a pregnant neighbor

mlynn333

Dear right boob,

Please stop hurting. Left boob is fine, why aren't you? There's no subtle way to deal with you hurting at work, and I just can't take it anymore.

Thanks,
me

Kedra231

Dear @HashtagRainbow & @WickedNE,

Thanks for the notice.  My PERSONAL posts are what I have to say; sometimes my responses to other posts may ramble a bit b/c I'm multi-tasking, but I feel stupid going back & deleting half, like I'm hiding something or changing my opinion to "fit" & I don't do that.  

Nobody has to read them or respond if they choose not to (posts or responses). SOME of my replies may be long, yes, but readers are also free to skim, skip, or read.  Even if they do read, I certainly don't expect agreement or understanding from all OP's.  No expectations, no rules, no demanding you read my posts/responses or reply.  

Sorry they disturb, feel free to skip them if they're long, or add me to your lists if it's that bad. I'm certainly not the only one who posts long responses sometimes; reading is always optional for everyone & sometimes I skip the longer ones too.  (The OP never knows, no harm, no foul).

Thanks much for notifying me.

melgrady

Dear BART trains and Unions,

Please finalize contract negotiations so I don't have to worry about how I am going to get my pregnancy butt into work. I am tired of waking up in the middle of the night to see if I have to adjust my commute and childcare plans because of your threats to go on strike.

From, Disgruntled Commuter

coralreefmom

Dear Pizza Dude, Yes, I know my apartment is a disaster. I call it packing. Don't judge. Sincerely, I really hate packing and moving eta: formatting

RondackHiker

Dear Feb 14, I've gotten a lot of support here. I like to think I've given a lot of support here. As a rule, I genuinely enjoy posting here and getting to know everyone. But can we please, for the love of god, stop complaining about the "usual bullies" or the "usual drama starters" or the "top ten" posters? Just say who you mean. And yes, I realize that I'm also not saying who I mean, but I don't feel like reading twelve different threads and writing down names. But really, please stop. Read the bullying thread pinned at the top of this page and read the rules for posting and see what is ACTUALLY bullying and against the rules. It's really irritating when all regulars or frequent posters are called bullies or accused of being unsupportive... Especially when there WAS no bullying and many regulars WERE supportive. In short... If you have a problem with me or another regular, grow some balls and name names rather than complaining about everyone. Thanks, Really tired and grumpy rondack

shellbell3845

Dear MIL, I don't care how much you badger us. You're not going to know the name of LO until his birthday. I don't care if you whine, scheme, stomp your foot, or guess. It's a secret. You're lucky you know he's a boy. No one else has a problem with this decision, and since you've basically been uninterested in my entire pregnancy, I don't feel inclined to indulge you. In fact, I'm really tired of the games you're playing. Sincerely, Your DIL who is actually not a monster

Kedra231

HashtagRainbow said:

@kedra231

Sorry, chose not to read the words, just to stare at the picture.  Feel free to post more of him.  It might not clear up YOUR grumpies, but it does a lot for mine.

vbryant55

Dear Employer,

Please give me the evaluation and subsequent raise that was promised to me 6 months ago. I am good at my job, damn good! Seriously, I am pregnant and I run circles around your so called other District Managers. I have tried being patient and bringing it up gently. Momma needs her money and she needs it now. 

Thanks,

Running out of patience and money!

Dear Husband,

I really am excited about your new job, and I'm sorry for being a bitch when you told me you had to be gone until November 11th for training. This job means a lot for our family and I know you are just doing your part and trying to be the best Dad you know how to be. 

Love,

Missing you already 

Dear LO,

This moving thing you do is phenomenal and I'm sorry that I was "smidge" disappointed when I found out you were a girl. It was immature and Momma knows better. 

Love,

Mommies aren't always right

mrsgoe23

Dear grandparents of Leah,

I think your "competition" of bestowing LO with gifts is amazing. Please keep the love flowing

Love,
The vessel of your precious granddaughter

Dear boobies,

I know you're stoked to start breastfeeding but there's no baby here yet. How about we stop leaking through 3 shirts a day?

Cordially,
Niagra Falls

Dear peers,

I know I'm about to be "someone's mother" but if I want to play Pokemon X or fangirl about Catching Fire then I will. I don't understand why that would negatively impact my parenting skills, unless you're just implying that "21 is just so young" and judging me.

Signed,
No one asked you.

Winnieella

Dear H,

 I don't know where you got the saying Cheese and Rice...but now that I have seen it on the bump, it's just supper funny. Also, thankyou for dealing with my puking....now you understand why it is so hard for me to clean. 

Love, 

Your (as you say) pukey mcpukesterr  wife

Dear Winston, 

You don't have thumb, how did you learn to open closed doors? Also, if you open them, please shut the door behind you. 

Love,

 Your confused mama

kt_arr

mlynn333 said:

Dear right boob, Please stop hurting. Left boob is fine, why aren't you? There's no subtle way to deal with you hurting at work, and I just can't take it anymore. Thanks, me

Dear @mlynn333,

Thank you for the good lulz. I also may or may not have spit my breakfast while reading that.

Signed,

Fellow bumper

Dear right foot,

Please stop cramping up and causing my toes to go numb. You're making it really difficult to do this whole work-out-and-be-healthy thing we've got going on every morning. I'd appreciate your cooperation.

Sincerely,

Disgruntled pregnant lady

KTdidit

ashleen223 said:

Also, Dearest Hubs,

Anytime you would like to quit smoking like you promised to do 2 years ago would be great. It would also be great if you would stop treating me like I'm the asshole when I mention your lack of commitment to quitting.

Signed your bitchy and impatient wife

Cosigned. DH has quit twice in the last year, both using Chantix, and has started up again. He doesn't realize that the medication won't do ALL the work for him, that he has to put some effort in too. Its annoying and I'm honestly disappointed in him.

Dear iTunes,

I'm not happy that I finally pull out DH's iPod to put my Hypnobabies tracks on it, and when I hook it up to the computer you deleted all of DS's lullabies that were on there. Plus you are not very easy to navigate. You better not mess up my phone when I hook it up too. I'm only doing it to have a backup of my 200+ pictures.

No love - irritated Momma

 

Dear DH,

Your comment about how expensive $150 is for the childbirth class I want to take was not appreciated. Especially on the heels of how you found a hotel for your dumbass trip to Nashville with your cousin (to see two band you've ALREADY SEEN) for "ONLY $99". And then proceed to say "I agreed to go with you, stop yelling at me". You are on my shitlist for tonight and you better be incredibly nice to me tonight.

Love - your wife who is not impressed with you today

 

And finally:

Dear stranger,

Thank you for using my debit card to charge $642 for something through AT&T, causing me to call and flip out on some customer service moron that answered. You better hope that I get my money back and I never find out who you are. You are also lucky that I brought lunch to work today, because my bank had to cancel my card and I wouldn't have been able to go buy lunch even if I was starving.

Sincerely - I'm choosing to believe that we have eerily similar debit card numbers and it was an innocent mistake

WookieesCookies

Dear TMI guy,

Stop wasting your breath. You are annoying. Just answer my questions, I don't need the extra fluff. When I ask you if you have had any tooth pain, I don't need to hear the story about how the flu shot gave you a sore throat. When I ask if you have noticed any swelling in your mouth, I don't need the "no but my ankle has been swollen". You answered every question in similar fashion. Just answer the damn questions with a yes or no, I don't need the extra information, I don't need your life story, I just need to clean your teeth and for me to do that I need you to quit talking!

Thanks,
Girl on a schedule

KTdidit

HashtagRainbow said:

@kaholland4 My DH is a dumbass too. He was on Chantix earlier this year and swore after 8 weeks he was done and could go off the meds. I told him he needed at least 12, if not 16 weeks total on it. But noooo, wtf do I know? He just admitted to me the other day after I caught him red handed that he's been smoking for months behind my back. I'm so disappointed in him. Also, that's nice your DH is bitching about spending $150 for childbirth class. Would he prefer to spend it on cigarettes?

It's not that he would rather spend the money somewhere else, he just doesn't get the idea of childbirth classes at all.

spicysurro

Dear Chiropractor,

 I went to you to try and address my pain not be sold a million products. I want you to help me not shove things I "need to buy" in my face. I wont be seeing you again.

Love,

 Still in pain.

Dear Self,

 Im proud of you for taking the first steps to become a Doula, I know you are scared but it can open many doors for you.

Love,

Me.