May 2013 Moms
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Need Advice Please

Ladies, I need your perspective.  My mom was admitted into the hospital this weekend.  My mom's leukemia is back. I live in Colorado and she is in Texas.  My little guy is 23 weeks and still breastfed.  While he does drink the bottle at daycare I EBF while at home.  I want to go see my mom during the weekend but DH is being stubborn and says that I can fly down by myself because he doesn't want J flying down with me.  Honestly I don't remember all his reasons for him not going but in my opinion there are no valid reasons why he can't fly.  Am I being unreasonable?  Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated.  TIA
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Re: Need Advice Please

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    beaubecca said:

    I think your H is being weird about it. Lots of kids fly at this age and I don't think there's any reason not to bring him with you if that's what you want to do.

    Totally agree
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    CNJ4EVACNJ4EVA member
    edited September 2013
    I think your H is being unreasonable, especially based on the reason for your trip. I would definitely be revisiting the issue.

    ETA Sorry about your Mom :(
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    I'm really sorry about your mom. Is she in the hospital? If not, and you'll just be visiting her at her home, I agree with beaubecca. We're taking our babies to Europe in November when they'll be not quite 7 months. Pedi's fine with it. And one of my best friends attended my wedding in London and flew from the US with her 5 month old, and it was no big deal. Just get his flu shot, try to keep him covered as much as possible in the airport and on the plane, nurse him on takeoff and landing for his ears and he'll be fine.
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    I think you're totally okay to fly with him. He may get sick, it happens, but I don't think that's a good enough reason not to go see your mom. I would even argue that seeing J might cheer your mom up and make her feel better and stronger!
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    LolalipsyLolalipsy member
    edited September 2013
    Without knowing his reasons it feels like I'm being one sided but every fibre in my body says you should go with your son.

    Seeing you both could be just the boost your Mum will need to fight this.

    Eta: clarity




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    I'm really sorry to hear about your Mum. I'll keep her in my thoughts and prayers.



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    If it was his mother who was sick would his options about flying with LO be different?

    I don't think that flying with LO is a huge deal. I agree with PP, it may help with her spirits, and God forbid something happen to her, she will have been able to see him.
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    They have to run more tests today on her bone marrow to decide on a treatment plan so she will be there all week and possibly next week if they do start chemo on her.  DH's reasons are he doesn't want me flying alone with J.  He doesn't want me to rent a car and just have a family member pick me up and doesn't want to depend on someone having the extra space for J's seat.  The other option is we drive down there this weekend as a family.  So we would need to stay somewhere rather than a hotel because we will have the storage box on top of our car as well of needing to put it somewhere while at the hospital.
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    I am sorry to hear about your mom.  Your H is being unreasonable. It isn't like you are going on a booze-cruise, you are visiting your mom who is sick.  I also believe that seeing you and your LO will really help boost her spirits.  If he is adamant about LO not flying, then I would insist he drive down.  Either way, your mom gets to see both you and LO.

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    Agree with PP. Take him. He will be fine. Sorry to hear about your mom. Hoping for the best!
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    He is not budging on me taking J.  Unless I can find a ticket for less than $300 then he suggested we all drive.  That is really the best option, the only problem now is finding family to stay with while we are there.  Even if I did find a ticket for less than $300 he is still not willing to let me take J (the whole car seat/rental car issue).  
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    1. Nothing could keep me from my mama if she were sick. 2. Where I go, LO goes. The only reason I pump is for work. Me and my baby would be on a plane.
    This x100 for me.  I'm sorry about your mom :(
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    If you left the baby who would watch him? It just makes sense to bring him. He can get over it. Leukemia is not something to mess around with.


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    Thank you ladies. We found a compromise. We are heading out early Friday morning and all driving as a family. My aunt has room for us so we are staying with her and our friends will watch our dog while we are gone. It will be a long drive but this way we all go and spend the same amount of money on gas versus a flight for just me. All ask now is please keep my mom in your T&PS.
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    I'm glad it worked out! Definitely keeping your mom and the rest of your family in my thoughts. 
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    Thoughts and prayers!! I'm so sorry about your mom
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    beaubecca said:
    I think your H is being weird about it. Lots of kids fly at this age and I don't think there's any reason not to bring him with you if that's what you want to do.


    I agree with this. If she's not at the hospital there really shouldn't even be a question. to be honest, I would want my mom to have the time with LO... raise her spirits. I'm really sorry you are going through this.

     

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    Thoughts and prayers headed your way! So sorry to hear this about your mom! I would take your son with you! Seeing him could really brighten her day and remind her of why she needs to fight harder to beat it! Once again I am so sorry to hear!
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