May 2013 Moms
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Sometimes I want to strangle DH

snowgirl427snowgirl427 member
edited August 2013 in May 2013 Moms
I got little sleep last night. Very little. This morning DH planned to do yard work. It gets very hot in the afternoon so morning is best. I give him LO while he was watching sports center so I can go to the bathroom and eat a piece of toast.

DH lets the dog lick LOs hand. I ask him not to since LO sucks on his hands more than anything. So I get up and get the hand wipes to clean LOs hands. I walk up and DH tries to hand LO to me. I said to give me 30 seconds to wash his hands. He proceeds to go bat sh*t crazy telling me that it is going to be too hot and that I don't care since I'm not the one out there.

I pointed out there will be no temperature change in 30 seconds and he continues to talk about how I'm not the one doing it. This is all after he spent the previous hour watching sports center which had just ended.

Sometimes I just want to strangle him.

Edit- bad typing

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March - May 2014 - Natural cycles - no luck
June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

Re: Sometimes I want to strangle DH

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    I definitely hope they catch on soon! I-)

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2:
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    June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

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    I feel for you. MH is lovely but he doesn't listen sometimes which is fine until it concerns DD then I go potty.



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    CNJ4EVACNJ4EVA member
    edited August 2013
    I totally feel your pain! I do 92% of the caring for LO and 100% of the cooking and cleaning. This morning DH actually got up with her at 7 (I got up three times MOTN) and he's been complaining how tired he is since I got up. I can tell he has an attitude towards me even though he's denying it.

    It's so frustrating. Also (while I'm venting), DH had never once told me that he thinks I'm doing a good job or that he's proud of my efforts with pumping ( my supply is on the low side and I've been trying hard to up it). Meanwhile, I praise him often on how good a Dad I think he is (even though I think he could help more).

    I know I shouldn't need to hear it, but it would be nice if he acknowledged me....just once.

    Edited because my reply posted before I was finished.
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    CNJ4EVA said:

    DH had never once told me that he thinks I'm doing a good job or that he's proud of my efforts with pumping ( my supply is on the low side and I've been trying hard to up it). Meanwhile, I praise him often on how good a Dad I think he is (even though I think he could help more).

    I know I shouldn't need to hear it, but it would be nice if he acknowledged me....just once.

    .

    Come to think of it, MH hasn't either...

    I know it isn't the same, but I think you are doing a fantastic job! :)

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2:
    March - May 2014 - Natural cycles - no luck
    June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

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    I've had so many sit down talks with DH about this stuff, he really doesn't get it.  I think he is incapable of empathy.  I swear if I hear "sleep when the baby sleeps" one more time...
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    DH had never once told me that he thinks I'm doing a good job or that he's proud of my efforts with pumping ( my supply is on the low side and I've been trying hard to up it). Meanwhile, I praise him often on how good a Dad I think he is (even though I think he could help more). I know I shouldn't need to hear it, but it would be nice if he acknowledged me....just once. .
    Come to think of it, MH hasn't either... I know it isn't the same, but I think you are doing a fantastic job! :)
    Why thank you and right back at ya!
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    LaxMOM44LaxMOM44 member
    edited August 2013
    Ya H didn't get it until I left him alone all day with the baby and prefilled bottles of breastmilk and told him good luck. When I got home she was crying hysterically and I felt awful but ever since he tells me how grateful he is and that I'm doing such a great job and he actually tries to help. He still hands her to me whenever she's crying which drives me nuts cause he's just as capable as I am as long as she's not hungry, but in general it was a good experience for him. Poor LO though I just pray she isn't permanently scarred.

    Edited because iPhones suck.
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    I left DH alone yesterday for less than an hour while I went to the grocery store. DS was crying and I asked if he had just started crying. DH said he had been crying since I left.

    I was a little happy but sad for LO. He was miserable all day for some reason and just wanted mommy. I took him, he cried for about 5 more mins and then passed out for a 3 hr nap!

    DH didn't say anything to me. Cnj4eva - now that I realize he has never once told me good job, it bugs me!!

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2:
    March - May 2014 - Natural cycles - no luck
    June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

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    Cnj4eva - now that I realize he has never once told me good job, it bugs me!!
    I've been harping on it ever since I put it in writing yesterday. X(

    I'm sorry that your DH isn't letting you know how fabulous a job you're doing. At least we have our fellow bumpies!
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    There are days when I think DH is simply the best, he's so good with her and helps around the house but other times I get so incredibly frustrated and feel the exact opposite. My friends and others have told me that as LO gets older, he will get better with everything as men do better when they can interact more with their kids. FX that this is true!
     


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    gmorel said:

    There are days when I think DH is simply the best, he's so good with her and helps around the house but other times I get so incredibly frustrated and feel the exact opposite. My friends and others have told me that as LO gets older, he will get better with everything as men do better when they can interact more with their kids. FX that this is true!

    I think this is going to be true for my husband. He doesn't have much experience with young babies so when she's fussy and crying, he doesn't know what to do. I give him pointers and he does his best, but after about 10 minutes he hands her back to me if she's still fussing. It annoys me, but at the same time, I don't want my baby to be crying and upset for that long. He even said to me once, you handle her now and I'll handle her when she's older and running around crazy.
    I don't necessarily agree with his logic, but I will remind him of it when the time comes!

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    jayro10 said:

    gmorel said:

    There are days when I think DH is simply the best, he's so good with her and helps around the house but other times I get so incredibly frustrated and feel the exact opposite. My friends and others have told me that as LO gets older, he will get better with everything as men do better when they can interact more with their kids. FX that this is true!

    I think this is going to be true for my husband. He doesn't have much experience with young babies so when she's fussy and crying, he doesn't know what to do. I give him pointers and he does his best, but after about 10 minutes he hands her back to me if she's still fussing. It annoys me, but at the same time, I don't want my baby to be crying and upset for that long. He even said to me once, you handle her now and I'll handle her when she's older and running around crazy.
    I don't necessarily agree with his logic, but I will remind him of it when the time comes!

    Yeah, I think we are more maternal by nature, obviously lol, and as hard as it is for us, we are more patient etc with our LO's. I know DH is a great Father and cannot wait to see him with her when she's a little older. I know he'll giver her great memories like learning to ride a bike etc, that's when he will shine and she will be Daddy's Lil Girl
     


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    My husband and I had an issue last night too, I'm so tired of needing to ask him to do things. I mean if you see dishes in the sink wash them, just take the trash out if its full. I'm trying to get caught back up on everything since I'm working a m-f job now. It's hard to keep up with house work and 3 kids. I'll be glad when school starts so it will maybe me a tad easier with only the baby at home for a few hours. Good luck, some men just don't ever get it.

    I hear ya on asking him to do things! It makes me feel like such a nag. It's like he has selective vision when it comes to things like dishes, etc. we have stairs in our house and ill set stuff on them to take up the next time I head that way, DH just walks right on upstairs and doesn't notice the stuff. Drives me crazy! But overall he's good with LO I just get annoyed at having to ask for help all the time.

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    I can't complain too much bc dh is helpful with cleaning and lo. What does drive me crazy is the fact that he tries to turn it into a contest. Plus I'm also bugged by the fact that he thinks he does more than I do. Which brings into play the whole contest thing. I work full time too, take care of lo and try to cook and clean as often as possible.
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    nonniedee said:

    H frustrates me sometimes- he is pretty messy around the house and lacks the initiative to pick up and do things without being asked, but when he holds her and talks to her my freaking heart melts. He is so adoring.
    Ditto to the leaving them alone, I went out for a girls night and he stayed with pumped milk- since I got a little tipsy he had her the entire night. He said what a new found respect he had for what I do and is MuCh more helpful now!

    I did the same and came home to this

    image

    She was wearing a too small onsie, and there were bottles of bm strewn about.
    I'm dying laughing lol.

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2:
    March - May 2014 - Natural cycles - no luck
    June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

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    CNJ4EVA said:



    Cnj4eva - now that I realize he has never once told me good job, it bugs me!!

    I've been harping on it ever since I put it in writing yesterday. X(

    I'm sorry that your DH isn't letting you know how fabulous a job you're doing. At least we have our fellow bumpies!


    Me too! I even called him out on it. Didn't do any good lol.

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2:
    March - May 2014 - Natural cycles - no luck
    June 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    July 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    August 2014 - Clomid 50mg - BFN
    September 2014 - Clomid 50mg - Fingers crossed...

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    I will say my DH tries! But sometimes I just wanna knock him out! I am EP and he does not get how hard it is to pump during the day when LO wants to be entertained! My supply is dropping and all he can say is that I should pump more! I am trying really hard to pump til the 6 month mark but it is getting harder and he just doesn't get it! And the dishes! I swear he will walk by them a million times!!! He does try to calm LO when he is fussy but usually ends up handing him back to me! Well he will have to deal with dishes and baby soon because I go back to work Sunday. I just hope LO takes it a little easy on him so I don't worry too much!
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