Godparents

laurenmdrn16

MH and I have finally decided on who we will ask to be godparents! I was filing out my life insurance plan, will etc and freaked out because we didn't have a final decision. At first, we were planning on asking MH's sister and BIL, but then my mom was saying how I should really ask my sister since she lives closer. Long story short, we decided to ask our very dear friends (not family) to avoid any awkwardness. They were MH's roommates in college, were there for us during some tough times, MH is their adorable daughter's godfather (she was born before MH and I met), we have the same faith and they have the best parenting style possible. If I can't raise my baby, there is no one I would rather entrust my baby to. Also, they live close by and are on good terms with both of our families. Their daughter has already drawn pictures for baby's nursery and decided that she and baby are going to be best friends after seeing baby kick when MH and I took her to see Despicable Me 2 (she is 5 so she will be more like a big sister or cousin).

We are going to have them over to swim in the pool and have a cookout this weekend and ask them. I am so excited! Are any of you ladies asking anyone to be godparents (either religiously or legally)? It is such a big decision, but I hope it goes well for everyone!

Michellepiner

We have talked about who our kids would go to should something terrible happen to DH and I. We chose my parents for various reasons, but we have not chosen godparents for any kind of religious reasons. But, I could not imagine having my kids raised by someone other than our families. That is just me.

laurenmdrn16

The good thing is that, as difficult as the decision is, you can change legal guardians if something changes. From what my insurance guy said, it seems like a simple process legally, so that helps take some of the weight out of the decision in a way. 

We went back and forth a lot on picking friends vs family, but know that our families will still be very involved in our baby's life. Also, something happened during MH's goddaughter's birth so they are unable to have more children, but always wanted their girl to have a sibling. Since she has no cousins close in age, having our baby as a god-sister or brother will be really sweet, I think. Also, MH joked that he didn't want to "cheat" our baby out of having all the aunts and uncles possibly PLUS godparents! Silly, but it does make sense for us.

Michellepiner

That makes sense. Each families' situation is different.

germanpickle

Our children will go to my husband's family. First my parents-in-law and if they are too old to assume care of our children, either my sister-in-law or my brother-in-law.  They live in Germany as well, have no financial problems, and did a very good job raising their own children. None of that is true about my family.

mrsredmoose

DS and DD will have different Godparents, but the same legal guardians. DS's Godparents are family, DD's will be close friends. Our first choice for legal guardian will be my sister (who is also DS's Godmother) and in the event she cannot take the children, our back up will be DH's BFF and his wife (the BFF will be DD's Godfather). Finding an alternate guardian was so difficult for us. We factored in the capacity for the guardian to love our children, to raise them similarly to what we would have done, and their financial and home stability.

mweav1025

We have different Godparents for both sets of children, but we haven't made any legal decisions as far as guardians.  There are several choices for us and I think once LO is born we will sit down and figure everything out as far as who we want to look after our children in case something happens.  We obviously want the kids to be together so that will weight heavily into our decision.  I know people who also ask the Godparents to be legal guardians but in our case because both kids will have different Godparents so we will be selecting a different couple for guardians since the Godparents aren't couples.

hartsl01

We will do different legal guardians and godparents. Our kids will have different godparents from one another but the same legal guardians. DH and I keep talking about it but can't make a decision so we put it on the back burner for now. It's definitely a big decision tho.

carawasa

We asked my brother and my SIL.  We had them over for dinner and they were really excited.  They are going to start trying for babies in September, and they live about 20 minutes away from us..they would be great parents to our baby girl if anything ever happened to us!

norbert5

Our kids have different godparents and the same legal guardians if something happens to us.

However everyone is aware and knows each other which is nice for us. I did just realize that if something does happen to us they will now have six kids total. Maybe I should check in with them and see if they are still okay with it?

laurenmdrn16

@norbert5, that was something MH and I tried to think about too. We didn't want to pick his oldest brother and SIL because they already have a large family. However, check with the people you have chosen as legal guardians. They may be perfectly fine with it. And I keep forgetting that this is worst case scenario. Chances are, nothing will happen, but it is good to have a plan.