We found out with my two previous pregnancies and plan to find out this time as well. DH and I were never patient enough to wait the full 40 (or in my case, 41) weeks to find out. This time, I really want to find out. If it's a boy, it will be so much fun to shop for boy clothes and decorate a boy's nursery for a change. If it's a girl, it will be good to know that we're fully stocked in terms of, well, everything.
"What crappy grandparents out there don't buy their grandchildren birthday presents, Christmas presents, baptism presents, Easter presents, and just because presents? All of those gifts could theoretically be pink or blue."
Not every person places as much weight on material gifts as you seem to assume your family will. It's douchey to call people crappy because they place value on more than just stuff. There are plenty of ways the Grandparents can show their love without spending a dime. Holy presumption!
"Idon't want a boy in a pink stroller, or a girl in a blue one. I prefer both to use green and brown."
First world problems, man. Really. Serious question: why does this matter so much? The baby is not aware of what color the stroller is. I promise the average person doesn't notice.
As soon as people find out you had a girl (if you do)...you will be showered with girly things. I was team green with DD and bought 2 girl outfits and 2 boy outfits, then had my mom wash the girl stuff and bring it to the hospital once she was born. It worked out well! Of course we recevied tons of girly things as gifts, and as soon as I was ready I was out shopping! LOL. Or online shopping.
In terms of saying there is plenty of time to buy pink or blue later that is technically very true. There will be a whole lifetime of the child being a girl or boy and people will inevitably purchase gender specific items later on. I don't see what the big deal is about thinking grandparents will make pink or blue purchases since this is very typical in my social circle. What crappy grandparents out there don't buy their grandchildren birthday presents, Christmas presents, baptism presents, Easter presents, and just because presents? All of those gifts could theoretically be pink or blue.
Wait, is this real life? Are you seriously insinuating that NOT buying presents at every single holiday makes someone a "crappy" grandparent?
Some people can't afford to buy gifts constantly, that doesn't mean they love the child any less... Wow, I still can't believe I just read that.
I originally planned to not find out (I love the surprise of it all) but started stressing (don't know why). My boyfriend was so intently watching the monitor I caved in and found out. We did a small gender reveal at my parents Christmas Eve b/c my mom had already started planning girl clothes - ummm NO!!
My major concern was getting a bunch of clothes at the shower. We have lots of practical stuff we'll need so I'm hoping that will override the desire of friends and family to play dress up with my little one.
I'm still planning very neutral decor - including car seat, toys, clothes, etc. It's just something about the browns, blues, greens and yellows that I adore!!
Idani said:I have to agree. The "What crappy grandparents" really really rubbed me wrong way.
This bothered me too. I was actually thinking about this while watching my 1 year old nephew open Christmas presents last night. I'd rather my parents buy my child one small gift for his/her birthday or Christmas if they insist, and take whatever else they planned to spend and put it in a savings/529 account for them. This is what I have chosen to do for my nephew and I'll do the same when my niece arrives in April.
Yay!! Go for it girl!!! Be team green!! We are also expecting our 1st little miracle in June and we are team green! I think its going to be an amazing experience to be able to be surprised! Like my mother says "Well after all that hard labor it is an amazing surprise to see what you're baby is!" As for clothes for both girl or boy I have a few outfits of each that will last till I feel up to shopping! We also plan to have a baby shower after the baby is here so not only are they able to come to the shower but they can also meet the little pumpkin!! Good luck and blessings to you!
My hubby recently decided that he wanted the gender to be a surprise. I absolutely don't. So I convinced him to comprise. Instead of waiting all the way till push day (yes, lol, that's what I'm calling it), we are going to have a gender reveal baby shower. Our ultrasound is this Thursday, and assuming baby cooperates and lets the tech see the gender, we're going to have them NOT tell us, but instead write it down and seal it in an envelope. I am then going to (without peeking) hand the envelope over to my friend who is hosting the baby shower. Key guests will be told ahead of time what the gender is, but me and hubby won't find out till the day of the baby shower. So I have to wait a bit longer, but not all the way till the end! Hubby went for the idea because he thought it would be fun and we could share our moment of surprise with our daughter (she's 3 and won't be in the delivery room) and friends.
We decided not to find out the gender of our baby for a few reasons:
1) We love surprises! and either way, this is a good surprise.
2) We plan to have more kids so it's only smart to buy gender neutral gear, furniture, etc.
3) It makes the day the baby is born just a little more exciting because everyone is so anxious to know if it's a boy or a girl.
We only bought small clothes in gender neutral colours (white, blue, yellow, green), because we can go buy larger outfits in gender specific colours after the baby is born.
we found out with DD1 and got the opposite reaction - most of my family & friends had stayed team green and were shocked we found out! They were almost...disappointed? for us for "ruining the best surprise life has to offer" or some bs. Um, we were still surprised, just at 20 weeks instead of 40. This time I don't want to find out, but DH does...we shall see!
We are keeping it a surprise! I did NOT want to do this -- I am far too impatient.. But I buckled and we are waiitng... i have to say, the closer it gets to the due date, the more happy I am that we waited!! I am so excited to meet him/her that I can hardly stand it. Whatever you decide, good for you -- it is going to be exciting to matter what!!
Oh ya, as far as neutral clothing. We just bought a few outfits in each gender and are keeping receipts. It certainly makes it more tricky, but my hubs had a good point that we are saving a ton by not buying a ton of stuff before the baby comes. Also, we were told that we will get a ton of outfits and stuff from people so it's not that big of a deal. Hope this helped
stroller colors or not, they'll still ask you if you have a boy or girl. My son wears blues and reds and they still ask me if I have a boy or girl and he definitely looks like a big boy. He's 3 months. lol- I had to find out with my baby because I don't plan on having any more children even though Gunner wasn't a planned pregnancy he wasn't unwelcome either. I see him as my miracle baby. High five to all the single mothers out there raising your babies. We don't need their fathers to be a family unit if it's their choice to continue to be boys and run around making a fool of themselves.
If I planned on wanting more children after Gunner, I probably wouldn't have asked to know what the sex of my baby was.
Hubby and I decided to keep it a surprise and people are very surprised! It seems like everyone finds out these days as soon as possible. I definitely understand the benefits to finding out early, so you can plan -- but for me those benefits didn't outweigh my desire to wait. Yes, some things will be a little harder (we have to pick 2 names out, we won't put a lot of clothes on our registry, we have to find gender neutral bedding -- which is surprisingly harder than I'd assumed) but overall I think it will make the birth that much more special to hear "It's a ......!". I also (perhaps naively) have told myself that pondering over the gender during labor *might* help distract me from the pain of it all. It's a personal decision really -- do what feels right for YOU!
I like Rebecca's post in parts but respect her opinion. We are team green and want to control the pink or blue snow ball effect off baby stuff before baby arrives. I too have my reasons for nuetral baby gifts in hope for things that are pratical rather than wasteful and don't end up as donations, Goodwill, or on Ebay. In reality, some people don't know how to shop for baby gifts. I have friends who are first time moms who end up with gifts that are never put in use nor their taste. I added the basic stuff to my registry for those who wish to give us a gift. But we bought and buying expensive items on our own that WE like and need.
My mom has always said there are so few naturally surprises in life, why ruin one. My Fiancé and I are not finding out what we are having and people think that we are crazy too. I have just always known that this is something I want to be surprised about!
I don't get the whole "lets not tell anyone until its born" thing. No one cares what genitals your kid has THAT much. It's not like people are holding their breath for you to tell them what the sex of the baby is.
I just want to say I envy those of you keeping it a secret.. this is my last baby, my fourth, and I have two boys and a girl. I know no matter if I find out or not, what I'm having is what I'm having, but I want to find out because I just have such a hard time not knowing for some reason. I wish I had it in me to just not want to know/want to leave it a surprise. But I get excited for any friends or family that end up doing the surprise thing, because I love the idea of it. It's a beautiful thing. Newborns wear mostly gender neutral stuff anyway, at least mine have.
I found out my first baby was a boy just because I'm a sonographer and happened to see between his legs. My husband didn't want to know so i kept it secret! I just hid any clothing i bought and pretended to look at girls names as well. This second time round he says again he doesn't want to know but I think I do.
I'm way too impatient to not find out. But I do want the experience of being surprised in the delivery room so we are thinking if we get one of each on our first two tries then we will let the third one be a surprise. This is our first and we are finding out next week. Trying to keep my mind off of it because I am SO ANXIOUS!!!
Team Green last pregnancy. Doing it again this time.
We bought bigger items in gender neutral colors. We knew we were going to have more than one. It seemed like the practical thing to do. As far as the nursery, I picked out an option for a boy and one for a girl. When DD was born, I went online and ordered what we needed. We had painted the room a neutral color and had furniture. It only took a couple of weeks and on our doorstep we had everything else we needed...linens, wall decor, etc. DD came home in a plain white outfit. This baby will come home in the same outfit. We have gender neutral clothes that will last this baby at least a few months.
We went Team Green because I'm insanely hard to surprise. I'm almost obnoxious about it. This was the one time in my life when I really, truly wanted to have something unknown. Practically, it worked out great. Emotionally, it was the best thing ever. My delivery experience turned into such a wonderful 'present' opening. I knew I had a daughter for the very first time when I actually laid eyes on her.
For me, that is why I think Team Green is awesome. It's not for everyone though.
I'm having a girl and her car seat, stroller, pack n' play and high chair are blue plaid. Why? Because I like the color blue and she's not going to know that I got her "boy" things.
I wanted to keep it a suprise and not find out, until we walked into a couple of baby stores and realized there aren't a lot of options in terms of neutral clothes! It sucks and then my husband tells me that he wanted to find out all along.. there's no way he's going to find out and I'm going to wait until delivery date! It would kill me to know he knows and I don't! Plus the planner in me wants to get everything ready for our little boy or girl... but there's so little surprises left in life... so I'm just confused right now!
We're not finding out and it is driving H CRAZY. He says he needs to "prepare". I tell him "prepare for what? It's a baby either way. It wears pajamas for the first 6 months".
I think it will be fun picking out 2 names and the nursery colors we love are neutral anyway.
I justify my stubbornness because I have to go through pregnancy+L+D+postpartum. I win.
ps- I had CVS so I could find out the sex now- it's in my medical record. But I WILL RESIST!!!
Re: Keeping gender a surprise
"What crappy grandparents out there don't buy their grandchildren birthday presents, Christmas presents, baptism presents, Easter presents, and just because presents? All of those gifts could theoretically be pink or blue."
Not every person places as much weight on material gifts as you seem to assume your family will. It's douchey to call people crappy because they place value on more than just stuff. There are plenty of ways the Grandparents can show their love without spending a dime. Holy presumption!
"Idon't want a boy in a pink stroller, or a girl in a blue one. I prefer both to use green and brown."
First world problems, man. Really. Serious question: why does this matter so much? The baby is not aware of what color the stroller is. I promise the average person doesn't notice.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
Baby #1 due June 5th, 2014
This bothered me too. I was actually thinking about this while watching my 1 year old nephew open Christmas presents last night. I'd rather my parents buy my child one small gift for his/her birthday or Christmas if they insist, and take whatever else they planned to spend and put it in a savings/529 account for them. This is what I have chosen to do for my nephew and I'll do the same when my niece arrives in April.
My son wears blues and reds and they still ask me if I have a boy or girl and he definitely looks like a big boy. He's 3 months.
lol-
I had to find out with my baby because I don't plan on having any more children even though Gunner wasn't a planned pregnancy he wasn't unwelcome either. I see him as my miracle baby.
High five to all the single mothers out there raising your babies.
We don't need their fathers to be a family unit if it's their choice to continue to be boys and run around making a fool of themselves.
If I planned on wanting more children after Gunner, I probably wouldn't have asked to know what the sex of my baby was.
We're not finding out and it is driving H CRAZY. He says he needs to "prepare". I tell him "prepare for what? It's a baby either way. It wears pajamas for the first 6 months".
I think it will be fun picking out 2 names and the nursery colors we love are neutral anyway.
I justify my stubbornness because I have to go through pregnancy+L+D+postpartum. I win.
ps- I had CVS so I could find out the sex now- it's in my medical record. But I WILL RESIST!!!