He/Him vs. She/Her

AGriffin620 · July 2013

Why does everyone keep calling our baby "he" or "him" when we haven't found out what we're having yet? It is driving me bonkers!!!

northport6 · July 2013

Yeah, what's that about? Happening to me, too. I wonder if it's just the awkwardness of keeping the pronouns neutral. With four months left, I find that exhausting myself.

GTown08 · July 2013

A lot of people seem uncomfortable calling the baby "it" and male pronouns are the default pronoun in our culture, for better or for worse. I tend to alternate between the three, sometimes calling the baby he, sometimes she, and sometimes it. I don't think anyone means anything by it, but I get how it can become frustrating.

MamaHanna · July 2013

I used ?he? because I was solidly convinced that I was having a boy. My DH only referred to LO as a ?she? because he thought it was a girl?and he was right.

golfingdarwinfish · July 2013

GTown08:
A lot of people seem uncomfortable calling the baby "it" and male pronouns are the default pronoun in our culture, for better or for worse. I tend to alternate between the three, sometimes calling the baby he, sometimes she, and sometimes it. I don't think anyone means anything by it, but I get how it can become frustrating.

Exactly. He/him have served as the 'gender neutral' pronouns for hundreds of years. No one means anything by it, it's merely the default.

ETA: We have no 'neutered' pronouns; "he" has really served that function. Latin has m/f/n, which was very annoying when learning the language, but is actually rather cool. There has been a movement in the US to adopt a neutered pronoun, but I don't think it has really caught on very well.

mrsAsullivan · July 2013

He is normally used generically for either sex. Personally, I'd rather use he when the sex is unknown than have someone call more unborn child "it". That's just my personal opinion since it means neither he or she but both.

natleilynn · July 2013

Ha! That's happening to me, too. Then again, everyone is completely convinced that we're having a boy. I don't know where all that is coming from.

zarahelise · July 2013

Before I found out I was having another girl, I called this baby "new baby". It caught on between my friends and family and a friend still calls her NB.

northport6 · July 2013

zarahelise:
Before I found out I was having another girl, I called this baby "new baby". It caught on between my friends and family and a friend still calls her NB.

My friends have taken to calling the LO "FutureSpawn," for better or worse. It gets nicknamed down to FS. We did receive a package address to "FS (hyphenated last names)" that was kind of funny.

AGriffin620 · July 2013

Yeah, I guess the "he" being neutral makes sense, but it is still frustrating to me. I've been trying to use "the baby" when I talk to people, but it isn't catching on. I can't wait to find out so we can use "him" or "her" for good. Thanks for letting me vent and for the good discussion!

AGriffin620 · July 2013

northport6:
zarahelise:
Before I found out I was having another girl, I called this baby "new baby". It caught on between my friends and family and a friend still calls her NB.
My friends have taken to calling the LO "FutureSpawn," for better or worse. It gets nicknamed down to FS. We did receive a package address to "FS (hyphenated last names)" that was kind of funny.

Ha! That's hilarious.

mightymousy · July 2013

Lol you know it never bothered me, probably because I always thought it was a boy so I was saying he/him too, but it drives me NUTS when people call my cat a she even though he's a boy LOL.

Ark2013 · July 2013

zarahelise:
Before I found out I was having another girl, I called this baby "new baby". It caught on between my friends and family and a friend still calls her NB.nbsp;

Lol. We do this too. We have done it since becoming pregnant with our second. It's new baby until we find out the sex and then it becomes him or her until we decide on a name. Then we just use the name.

golfingdarwinfish · July 2013

We started calling LO "olive" at 6 weeks and it has stuck. We know the sex, but still call LO olive.

Also, maybe this is flammable, but I had no problem referring to LO as an "it" and I sometimes still do.

BreeIsbell · July 2013

We naturally said he/him before we foun out it was a girl! Not because we wanted only a boy but for whatever reason that's what came to us in our conversations. Now we find ourselves having to correct it back to she/her because we just got used to saying it the other way. I wouldn't read too much into it :]

He/Him vs. She/Her

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